Impossible - May's variant

3rd Chapter : The happiest country

May and I talked for like the whole day. Well, not in our Spanish class, our teacher seems to hate us already. Before we went out school together, May asked me if I had time this evening to go watch a movie at the Savoy Cinema. To be honest, I hadn't. I just wanted to go home and finally start reading "Paper Towns" by John Green, but it seems that she could be something like a friend for me. I'm usually pushing everyone away, but not this time. I promise that I will change. I just want to be different from the last Jenna who was totally done with everything in Manchester. Not again, I won't let people like this get me again. I'll just be social, nice and... And fabulous. So I just said yes, why don't start being social today?

"How was your day? How's the school? Do you met nice people? What about your lunch? Is there a reason to worry? Did you break anything?", my mom said, or screamed while she was running down the stairs.

"Oh my god mom! Everything is fine calm down!" - "Ph, I'm just caring about you... So, what happened?"

"You are wei-" - "Just like you" - "wow, maybe I wanted to say wondeful? Well, nothing much happened. I met this girl named May and we're meeting this evening. So I'll probably will come home later as I usual go to bed reading."

"And when will this be please?", stupid question. She knew what I think about time. "I don't know, later..."

"well, okay. At least it's good to know that everything's fine and you're making friends. Hungry?" - "Kinda. But me? Making friends? Never. She's talking like all the time and I give answers."

"You're so negative. Stop!"- "I know, sorry." I'm always negative. In everything. But it's a family thing! From my father's side. He was always very negative and never saw the good in anything. This trait can be really hard, for the person and everything around them. But it's chronic I swear!

"It can take a while, just come down when I call you" - "It's fine, I'm starting to read "Paper Towns...", I don't think she even heard me. Just after "It can take..." I was already on the stairs.

I really tried to read so hard to read. But I couldn't. My room is still so empty, with nothing personal of me. I can't read in such an empty place without soul like this. Impossible for me.

"Jenna you're too late", May said to me with a little anger in her voice, "have you ever heard of time?! I'm waiting for you since almost 1 hour!"

"I know, sorry I didn't find the right way. And time? If clocks wouldn't excist, nobody would care about "time". Time is such an excuse for getting mad at people for coming a bit later than you."

"Wow, that was deep. Never do that again.", deep? What? That's just true. Don't be superficial May! "Sorry."

"Anyway, lets get in it's cold" - "Cold? If you wouldn't wear such short things like this you wouldn't be cold!"

"Naah shut up." Wow, she could be even a little bitch. I liked her anyway. "You can be kinda superficial huh?"

"No, not really. I just talk and don't think about my words. So I sometimes really seems rude or superficial. I'm sorry if I were already rude to you. Most of the time I don't even remember what I said 5 minutes ago.", she said. Well, at least she knows herself. "So, what should we watch?"

"I don't know. Any suggestions from your side?" - "That's why I'm asking you." , oh how right, "Well, we could also just go around, I show you a bit of Dublin and you tell me a bit about yourself, huh?"

"Well, okay. Even if I don't like talking about me. I always think I sound selfish and who likes selfish people? I know enough and they are just... ugh. I don't want to be vulgar or even be nasty! I just hate people like this and it's also the reason why I am here.", what the fuck did I say?

"So you moved now why?"

"People just fucked me up and I was so done with everything, you can't even imagine I swear. They literally made me feel like I was meaningless. Like I had nobody and no purpose. Well, it were true. I had nobody. My parents were the only ones who could keep my head up. Till my father died. My mom still isn't over it. I had to go through everything alone for months over months. And then there came the point were it was enough. Were I said to myself 'I can't keep going like this. I need to start over again anywhere far away from here.' So I'm here now and I don't even know if I should be happy about it or cry instead. Sometimes I just wish I could go back to page one of my life and start over again. But lets say this is page 10 and the 0 is for the chance I already had." It was hard to hold my tear back, but I happily calmed myself. Again.

"Wow, that sounds hard.", that sounds hard? Is that all? Well, better than she'd just be quiet and say nothing. But it's May, she talks like people who breathed helium and talk the whole time because they love their voices. "It is. What's wrong? Don't you love to hear your own voice?"

"I do but I seriously don't know what to say... I never believed all these stories celebrities tell in every interview over and over again could never happen in real life. But if you say the truth, it obviously can." And she calls me deep?

"Obviously. The only difference is that I don't tell the whole world and that my story is actually true, I think a lot of all these celebrities are little attention seekers. I'd rather die than be famous. But everyone's like them."

"So they're just uhm... Ordinarry to you?" - "Excactly. The whole world's made of little ordinarry attention seekers."

I looked up to her for the first time after we started talking. She were a few inches higher than me. Not more than 10. "I just think you can't say the world is filled with all of them. There so many other people in this world than you know. You haven't seen much of the world yet huh?"

No. Of course I hadn't. I've never seen anything else but the UK... "No, I'm a boring person. But I mean I'm just 15!"

"Have you ever been to Switzerland?" - "No, I read a book played there." - "Was it a happy story or has it had a good end?" - "Yes why?", I was confused about this conversation. What's the point?

"I knew it. The happiest people live in Switzerland. I don't know why but if you google it, google will tell you it's the best place to be born.", she seemed very excited about the fact that she was obviously right.

"Did you know that the best places to be born in are Switzerland, Australia, Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Singapore, New Zealand, the Netherlands, Canada an Hong Kong?"

"No, but what do you want to say with this fact? The best country to be happy isn't the one wich is on the top of a rate, it's the one were you want to be and where you're happy." I said. She didn't even answered me. Obviously I beat her with this fact wich was true.

"I know", she said after forever. "So I live in the best. I love Ireland."

We were standing in front of a big Cathedral. I heard about it before, ut never knew the name. I think May noticed that I wondered about it so she said "It's the Christchurch Cathedral, it's one thing I also love about Dublin.", it were really big and I was too flashed to say anything but a creepy "wow".

"H-How late is it by the way?" I asked thinking about my mom. She always worried too fast about me. "uhm... 9:30 pm"

"Sorry, I have to go now. I beg my mom is already worrying, she does very fastly."

"Well, okay. Do you find the way home alone?" - "Yes it's okay thank you"