Accidentally In Love

twenty

It's been months since Magcon broke up. Yes, it was pretty sad, but me and Matthew are as happy as ever. It turns out that Matt had gotten the leading role of a new movie. He still won't tell me what it's about, but I have currently released my first album and it went big. Right now, I'm getting Sam ready with the help of Grace. Cam said that he was going to give her a promise ring and we can't tell her anything about it. "There." I said as I finished the last curl on her hair. "Oh my gosh! I love it so much! Thank you!" Sam cheered as me and Grace laughed at her excitement. Cameron knocked on the door and I opened it. He gave me a small, "Thank you." I nodded and walked to my room due to my phone that was ringing obnoxiously loud.

I hesitantly swiped my hand across the screen as the contact read, 'Los Angeles Hospital'. "Hello?" I sweetly asked. "Hello ma'am, is this Mackenzie Adams?" The nurse asked me.

"Yes..." I trailed off.

"I'm sorry to tell you this, but Jacob Whitesides has recently been fin a car accident. I'm extremely sorry, but he is not breathing." Right then, right there; I fell on my knees and began to stare at the wall from sudden shock.

"W-what?" I barely chocked out.

"I'm sorry for your loss." A tear fell down my cheek that was followed by another. Soft sobs came out of my mouth as I hung up the phone. My hands were shaking, my throat had a lump in it, and my soft sobs were close to screams by now. I place my head in my hands. This is all of my fault. My fault. Mine. I brought my knees up to my chest as I tightly hugged them. Flashbacks of Jacob slowly played in my head like if my whole life had been a movie. Tears were falling on the floor as I stood up. I need to see him one more time. I quick ran out of Matthew and I's house. I was running through the streets, but it was difficult because the the tears in my eyes never seemed to stop rolling down my cheeks. By now, I was starting to hiccup due to the lack of being able to breath.

I ignored everyone's concerned questions until I was at the front desk of the hospital. "J-jacob Wh-itesides." I was barley able to get out. "Down this hall, room 42." She never once looked at me, but I didn't care now. I sprinted all the way to his room. Room 40, 41, 42! I wiped away my tears and slowly opened the door. "Jacob?" I asked, but I knew that it was meaningless because he can't hear nor answer me. I looked at his pale and scarred body lie stiff on the thin bed. I grabbed his hand and lightly kissed it. He's so cold. All because of me. I could've helped him.

"Hey there, I know you can't hear me, but I wanted to say that I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I never tried harder i-into...showing how much my love is for you. I'm sorry for not being the best friend. I really tried, but I never seemed to do it. I'm sorry for never being as good of a person as you wanted me to be. I know I have been bitchy many times, but I regret everything so much. This wouldn't have happened if I didn't ask you to come over. I-I feel like I never try hard enough, like I just slip everything past my fingers. But I am extremely sorry about being so greedy, that's the reason why you are here; dead. And it's also why I'm talking to myself while holding your lifeless hand. I just never do anything right. I'm sorry Jacob, but for one last time...I love you." My heart squeezed and I was bawling my eyes out on the cold floor. He didn't deserve this. Jacob has more into his life. All I have is Matthew now, I don't talk to Sam that often and Jacob is gone. I love you brother.

I kissed his forehead and walked out of the door. This time, I took my time into walking home. One by one, hot tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. I quickly swiped it away as I opened the front door. "Hey May- oh my god, what's wrong babygirl?!" Matthew ran to me and started hugging me while lightly rocking me back and forth. The lump in my throat grew as I didn't want to tell Matt what happened. "J-Jacob got into a car accident and..." I started to sob even harder from thinking about finishing this sentence, "he's d-dead."

"Shh, babygirl, I'm still here. You're not alone." I nodded and walked up to my room. I quickly grabbed Jacob's guitar that he left over by accident. I picked up Matt's camera from the closet and turned it on. "Hi guys, I know that I look like a piece of crap. But some shocking news was said to me a while ago and I completely broke. I dedicate this song to you." I slowly whispered the last sentence as I looked up at the ceiling. I strummed the guitar and started to sing.

"Some things we don't talk about.
Rather do without and just hold the smile. Falling in and out of love.
Ashamed and proud of, together all the while. You can never say never while we don't know when.
But time and time again.
Younger now than we were before.

Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go.

Picture, you're the queen of everything.
Far as the eye can see under your command.
I will be your guardian when all is crumbling.
I'll steady your hand.
You can never say never.
While we don't know when.
But time, time and time again.
Younger now than we were before.

Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go.

We're pulling apart and coming.
Together again and again.
We're growing apart but we pull it together. Pull it together, together again.

Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go. Don't let me go."

I slowly finished the song that Jacob once sang to me. By now tears are falling on the guitar. I turned off the camera and quickly uploaded the video on my channel. "Baby?" Matt knocked on the door. "Come in." I sniffed and waited for him to walk in.

"Are you okay?"

"No."

"Do you want to be alone?"

"I can't. Last time when I was left alone while I was sad..." I trailed off and lifted my hoodie sleeve up to expose my faded scars. "May." He was about to cry and I hated seeing him cry. "Don't e-ever do this again." He demanded as he kissed each scar. I weakly smiled at him. Matthew pulled me into a tight hug as we both sobbed onto each others shoulders.

"Don't worry sis, I'll take care of you." Jacob? "Remember what I said? Forever and always just like I promised."

_______________________________________
I was crying so hard just writing this, but I thought that I should add something in here.

Lol. I was listening to depressing ass music as I wrote it, so why not?

I'm sorry if I made you cry. Just kidding
（〇冖〇）

I wove you.

Hahahahaha.

I'm bipolar as hell.

Qotu: what's your favorite fanfic?