Reasons To Try |Completed|

Chapter 14

"Mommy!" Both the girls yelled out to me happily. Maddy and Cassy both ran to me and engulfed me in a huge hug. "I missed you mama!" Maddy told me.
I smiled. "I missed you too!" I told them. I stood up and Maddy settled with holding my hand while Cassy wanted me to carry her. "Did you guys behave?" I asked, knowing already that they did. They always do!
Cassy hugged my shoulder and nodded. "We did everything we were told mommy." She assured me.
"Good, thank you for behaving." I then looked toward Theresa. "And thanks for watching them. I really needed the night away, it's been a little crazy the last couple weeks." I informed her.
Theresa frowned. "So I guess you can tell me about it then?" She asked hopefully.
I shook my head. "Not with the girls here. I swear I will tell you about it later though." I made her a promise.
Theresa huffed but accepted the answer. Turning toward Matt and Ian, she gave a smile. "So, how have you two been doing?" She asked. They didn't say anything and Theresa laughed. "I'm gonna be the only one who's out of this whole secret then huh?"
I put Cassy down and sent the girls into the bedroom for a minute. "Things just aren't good right now. There's kind of a huge rift in everyone's relationships right now." I told her. "It's between Josh, Matt and I."
She gave an 'O' face and then nodded. "I see. Well, I hope things get better for all of you soon then." She told all three of us. She then grabbed me and pulled me aside to whisper in my ear. "Do you have a place to stay?" She asked.
I shrugged. "Well, I was planning on just going to a hotel until they left my house. I mean, I have one direction in my house right now because of Josh so I want them all out and then we will be going back. And then we will probably move somewhere." I told her honestly. I hadn't even told Ian I was thinking of moving,well not seriously anyway. I know he will freak the second he finds out.
Theresa gave me a cold look. "Don't run from your problems Lex. You've done that your whole life and it hasn't gotten you very far. Don't keep running. Don't make the girls run from your problems." She told me.
I thought about it for a minute before nodding. "Okay, well it's just a thought right now. I having made any plans yet. But I'll make sure you're the first to know what I plan on doing once its final." I assured her.
She nodded and I went to the bedroom to grab the girls. When I got close though, I heard something very surprising that I didn't think I would ever hear. I stood at the door and listened for a moment. They were playing a game, I think something related to school.
"So, that means angle theta equals 91 degrees." I heard. "Now turn the page and do the question on the back. It says that you have to do powers. So the first one is 5 to the powers of 5. And that equals 3,125." I listened to Cassy teach Maddy math.
Maddy gave a frustrated groan. "I don't know how to do that math Cassy. I'm just 6." She told her.
I came into the room. "Come on girls, it's time to go." I glanced at the book Cassy was taking her 'math class' from. The answers to her questions were not on the page. I grabbed the book and brought it out. "Ian, pull up your calculator for a minute. Check what 5 to the power of 5 equals." I requested.
Ian did the math on his calculator. He answered a moment later. "It's 3,125."  He told me. Everyone looked at me and Cassy smiled, knowing that she was correct. "Why did you suddenly want to do math?" Ian asked curiously.
I looked at Cassy and she gave a very happy look. I was shocked. "9 to the power of 6."
Ian started doing the math on his phone but Cassy answered first. "It's 531,441." She told me with a glowing smile.
I looked to Ian and he nodded, clearly shocked. "How did you do that?" He asked Cassy. She just shrugged her shoulders. Ian looked at me. "You have a genius!" He exclaimed.
Maddy grabbed my hand, obviously upset that everyone was amazed by her sister and not herself. But she is a very bright child too! Maybe she's not a math genius but in her own ways, she is brilliant. I just squeezed her hand for reassurance. She seemed to be accepting after that.
Theresa took the book from me. "I would let her take this but unfortunately it's Stevens. Him and tommy were here a few nights ago and I guess he left it here." She explained. Tommy is her son and Steven is her stepson. She gets Tommy every weekend and then he goes back with his father, Theresa's ex husband, Evan during the week. Steven sometimes comes along but he's 15 so he doesn't really care as much as Tommy, who's 8.
I sighed and grabbed the girls bags and they got their coats and shoes on. Ian took them out to the car and got them in and buckled. I turned to Matt. "Matt. Do you mind waiting here?" I asked sweetly.
Matt gave me a curious look. "Why?" He asked.
I gave a still sweet look. "Because I don't want you at my house anymore."
He groaned. "You still won't forgive me? I told you I was sorry and you don't even care?" He whined.
I gave a hard glare. "You keep telling me it's Josh that I'm mad at and not you! Obviously if you were truly sorry you would just own up to your mistakes!" I yelled at him a bit louder I meant to. I calmed myself down. "You can come back to get your things when I tell you to and then you need to leave and not come back for a very long time."
Matt was shocked by my request. "But, what about the girls? You can't just kick me out of their lives!" He suddenly looked scared.
I chuckled. "Actually I can." I told him. He gave a look that was begging me not to take them away from him. I closed my eyes and cleared my thoughts. "But I won't." I told him. He went up to me and hugged me out of pure relief. I shoved him off me. "Make no mistakes Matthew. I won't take them from you because of them. They love you and I'm not about to take away someone they love. But it is by no means because of you soley." I told him. I then said goodbye to Theresa and walked out the door.
----------------------------------BACK AT HOME------------------------------
     "Do you plan on forgiving them any time soon?" Ian asked me curiously.
     I glanced at my older brother. "You don't have to choose between us you know. It doesn't really concern you anyways." I told him, regarding the fight between Josh, Matt and I.
     He chuckled. "It doesn't actually. You are my sister, they are my band mates. And the two little girls caught in the middle of the whole are my nieces. Of course it concerns me Lex." He informed me. I didn't even realize any of it until now. "Listen, I have no right to tell you what to do but can I at least make a suggestion to you?" He asked.
     I nodded my head. "I was really hoping you would." I admitted. I didn't exactly have the greatest history with dealing with those two boys. I didn't want any repeats.
     Ian stepped closer to me so only I could hear him. "Move on!" He told me. I gave him an irritated look, assuming he thought I was overreacting just like the other boys did. "Show them that whatever hold they think they still have over you isn't there. Show them that you can move on to the next chapter of your life and find someone else." I softened my features, realizing the true nature of his original comment.
     Thinking for a moment, I nodded. "As usual, you're completely right!" I chuckled. "I've got no reason to mope around all day waiting for one of them to say the right thing to make me fall back in their trap." I announced rather loudly.
     "That's right! You're. Strong, independent, beautiful young woman who deserves way more than either of them ever gave you. They were too dumb to see what they had when they had you. Show those bastards what they're missing out on!" He told me proudly.
     I was starting to feel really pepped up. Then I realized I had no idea how to properly move on. I didn't even know where to begin. "I'm ready but can you tell me what my first step is?" I wondered aloud.