In love with Chris Collins

Chapter 54

Song For Chapter: Not About Angels by Birdy

I woke up in my bed with Chris lying by my side. He was sleeping peacefully with his arms wrapped around me, I slightly moved his hand over and kissed it. He got up and smiled

"Morning" he said in his raspy morning voice I looked at him and smiled

"Morning" I said yawning and got up and went to the bathroom and when I did I saw blood in my underwear and I instantly got scared I then took a shower as quick as I could and changed underwear and put on a pad and then I put on a black and white shirt dress with some white converse

"Chris I think we have a problem here" I said holding my stomach I looked down at my stomach and back up with tears in my eyes

"oh no what happened" he said running over to me and hugging me I wrapped my hands around him

"I-I went to go use the restroom and when I did I saw b-bl-" I said but he cut me off in the middle

"oh god no we have to go to the hospital like now, like right now" he said as I grabbed my jacket and my purse and phone then he grabbed my hand and we both ran to the car when I got in the car a tear ran down my face along with a bunch of other ones

"what happened I don't understand I did everything right I swear where did I go wrong" I said putting my hands up to my face and wiping the tears off of my face Chris grabbed my hand from off of my face kissed my hand

"whatever happens just don't beat yourself up over it okay we can always try aga-" but I cut him off

"I actually don't want to try again, if I loose this child I wont be able to deal with loosing another one so we are not trying again but if nothing is wrong and everything is fine we will keep the baby" I said he nodded but he was a bit hurt I could tell

"I mean of course later in life if you still want a baby we can try again but...you know what I can't even talk about that right now we are going to be optimistic about this the baby was fine it could be premature laboring or something it doesn't have to be bad right?" I rambled while Chris was driving me we pulled up to the doctors office and the tears started coming back

"god Chris I am so nervous" I got out of the car and leaned on the hood of the car while crossing my arms he got out and then he wrapped his arms around me

"look like you said we are going to be optimistic about this we are going to go in there with a positive attitude and we are going to be fine everything will be fine its okay" he said I didn't really feel like arguing but I nodded anyway, in my mind I was saying that everything won't be fine but I appreciate and understand what he is doing he's...he's trying.

He grabbed my hand and we walked in together I wiped the tears out of my eyes and tried to look as normal as I could even though my eyes were red and my face was puffy looking 

"uh we have an appointment for Taylor" Chris said 

"yes" the front desk lady said and gave Chris the little board so he could fill out the papers on it

we both sat down and I started to get cramps that made a tear fall out of my eye but I quickly wiped it away before Chris saw but it was too late 

"whats wrong" he said sympatheticly 

"nothing" I said 

"whats wrong" he said again filling out the last word on the paper

"I just had cramps just now" I said just then I heard

"Taylor smith" I looked up and the doctor took me in the back 

"okay today we are going to do the screening" I looked at Chris as I laid down and she slithered on that cold blue stuff and put the little monitor on me she looked at the screen and gave me a worried look 

"what" I said nervously 

"Ms. Smith i'm so sorry but you lost your baby" I looked up at Chris and cried so hard I just lost my baby