This is a depressing poem I wrote a couple of weeks ago. I just needed to get this off my chest to help me feel better.
A Word That Can Mean Different Things
Staring down at the shiny object held in my hand
Everything around me fading away
Lost from my thoughts
Overwhelmed from my body screaming at me
Screaming and begging to be destroyed
For it to feel pain
I wanted to resist
But the need to punish myself
Was all that was on my mind
Pain being much deserved
I dug the blade in my arm
And dragged it across my skin
Feeling the painful pricking as it cuts my flesh
Warm blood pooling out of the cut
Staining the corner of the blade
There was one cut
But I needed more!
I cut more
The cuts forming into letters
More blood spilling out
More pain in my arm
One tear
Then another
Why did I keep going?!
All I feel is regret
For what I just did
Reality is now sinking back in
I don't feel pain anymore
Now I feel regret
What is wrong with me?
I can't undo this
The scars are permanent
Hiding it won't be enough
I'll still know it's there
To haunt me forever
I can't stop staring at my arm
At the word I carved into my skin
A word that can mean different things...
"Kill"
