"I'm Fine"

Chapter 8//Crashing Down

23 Days Before the SUICIDE

I woke up and looked at the alarm clock feeling that something was off. I got out of bed and dressed into a fresh outfit provided by the hospital.
This is wrong. Something's wrong. Then it clicked- I didn't wake up and wish I was dead. As soon as I thought that I regretted it, because I felt the pressure in my chest as soon as I did.

I sighed and walked to the breakfast hall alone.

Today was cinnamon rolls, sausage, and coffee. I decided to just not get food, knowing I won't eat it.

I sat down alone, well, not completely. I still had my demons. Then a thought hit me. I haven't had a single thought of suicide since this morning... Maybe, maybe, I'm getting better. I was about to get up and go back to my dorm when I ran into a girl behind me. She was tall with blue eyes and brown hair. She was perfect.

"Excuse you!" She scoffed.

So maybe not perfect.
"Sorry, I, uh-" I stuttered.

"You worthless piece of shit!" She said. She looked down and saw my scars on my arm. "Ew. Your emo." She said with a disgusted look.

Tears started to spring to my eyes.
"Don't mess with me, Wescott. I will ruin you." She said with a smirk. She turned around and walked away. I sped walked to the bathroom. You worthless piece of shit. I said to myself. The tears came.

I was now sobbing silently into my hands. I recovered then walked out of the bathroom like everything was fine.
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I stood up on that balcony in tears. But not because I was sad- but because I was happy. It was finally ending. I would finally be happy. I hovered one foot over the edge. I'm not afraid. I leaned forward and let go.

*the day before*

Go die you emo bitch." The girl from breakfast said while I walked past her. That's the plan. I thought. Because it was. It's visitor day.

Meaning they keep the doors unlocked.

Meaning I can escape.

Meaning I can die.

I started to walk faster to the lobby. Replaying the plan in my head, I smiled as I reached the lobby. I casually walked, not drawing attention to myself. I walked through the lobby and reached the door. I felt the cold metal before making a run for it. I ran faster then I ever have.

I ran.

And ran.

And ran.

Until I saw an apartment complex that was high enough for me to jump from. I ran toward it and went to open the door.
It was locked. Of cores. Just then a man comes through the door. About middle aged, average. "May I help you?" He said in an Irish accent. "Yeah.. I locked myself out." I cleverly said. "Well here, I'm going out anyway, so you can go in" he said smiling. I thanked him more then I needed to and ran up the stairs.

I reached the 7th floor and went to the roof. I ran to the edge.
*Flashback over*
I let go. Not even a second after, I hear a voice. "Wait!" He screams. He grabs my arm. I feel my arm practically be pulled out of socket and look up in shock. Pierce. My mouth fell open as he pulled me up. "No! Let me fucking die!" I yelled and kicked. But it was no use, he was stronger.

"What the hell were you thinking!" He said. I was thinking I wanted to die.