Fuck it. (Creeypasta/Others/Humor)

Introductions! Audrey meets Eyeless Jack and Slenderman!

A/N: in the end of each chapter they meet a third and/or fourth person jussoyaknow.
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AUDREY P.O.V

"I'm off to find new pastas! The scary creepy pastas!!" I sang, trying to mimic the Wizard of Oz song. Now who shall I meet.. There's so much to choose from!! OOH! I know! Slenderman and Eyeless Jack! Perfect. I went about throughout the halls, but couldn't find them.

"Where the hell could they be! Masturbating? Damn--" My sentence was cut off, by.. Screaming?

"AHHHH!!! THE MONSTER STILL HOLDS ONTO ITS VICTIM! SHIZZ!" I heard a voice that sounded like.. Kasel?

"Damn Kasel scared the living shit out of me.." I muttered. If anyone were watching, it would look like I didn't get scared, but instead have a boss poker face. You see, I literally scream in the inside but on the outside my face is blank.

I continued walking when a brilliant idea came to mind. --Wait, WAIT! "What the fuck is this light bulb?" I tried waving off the glowing thing over my head. It vanished.

"That was weird, am I right people who's reading? THATS RIGHT! I broke the fourth wall~"

Ok, so the plan was to run for no reason and bump into the person I "Don't" wanna see. Cliché always works in these novels.

I started sprinting through the halls. I stopped and rested against a wall. I panted heavily, "D-damn.. I sur-e hope I-I-- DAMMIT I-I'm TOO OUta.. B-BREATH TO TALK!" I said trying to catch my breath.

Once I did I started speaking again. "Damn, I sure hope I won't bump into Eyeless Jack and Slenderman.." I said, about to run. "*cough* no sarcasm intended." I lied.

I started running again, then BAM! I crash into someone. I knew this would work HA. There stood in front of me, the star of many fan fictions, the infamous Eyeless Jack everyone!

"THE CLICHÉ GODS HAS REWARDED ME WITH.. THIS CLICHÉ. "

Eyeless Jack looked at me weirdly. I can tell. Cause I'm magical. "So, Ya like cats? YOU BETTER! OR IMMA NUKE YOUR BANANA!!" I ushered.

"Alright, alright! I like cats!! Please don't nuke my precious stick.." His voice lowered as he covered his crotch.

"Dude, I actually meant your banana." I pulled a real yellow banana out of his pocket.

"Oh, well then I don't like cats cause.. I'm allergic." He said, rubbing his nose as an indication. I gasped, feeling as if I blew up. I raised the banana and tighten my hold around it, squirting the squishiness from inside in his face.

"YOU JUST GOT NUKED, EYELESS JACK." I ran off and he began chasing me. I threw the banana peel on the floor, causing him to slip. "HAHA, IM AUDREY BY THE WAY! LATER CAT HATER!!"

I was well enough far away from him now, but I can still hear him yelling 'You squirted it up my noise!!' Now that is a comedy book for Ya!

*Time skip DaNcE*

"SLENDYBALD LETS PLAY!! SLENDYBALD LETS PLAY!" (Get it? Korean drama anyone? No..? Ok. :c ) I yelled. Where the hell is this bald man. I wanna meet him already!!

Then, as if I were in a dream, a wondrous smell hit my nostrils. I instantly started running to where the glorious sent was coming from: The kitchen.

"I SMELL FUNYONS!!!" I bursted through the kitchen door. "Wo-WOAH! SLENDYBALD!! I FOUND YOU!" I ran up to him and pounced on him, making him fall over. "1,2,3. Your out!" I laughed.

I perked up, the smell averting back to me. I see the bag. The bag of fabulous funyons.. But it's beautifulness is being .. EATEN! I ran up to the person who's eating the funyons and slapped him across the face.

It was Masky! I could recognize that mask anywhere! I snatched the bag out of his hands and shoved it down my pants.

"MINE!" I yelled, backing up to the door. Masky was about to protest, but I pointed a hand gun to stop him. "Officer Audrey, at your service. Nice meeting Ya Slendybald and Mr. Mask." I said before backing out of the kitchen dramatically.

I was currently in the living room, sneaking a Funyon from my pants when, "POOP BALLZ!" I yelled as I was tackled to the ground. "I HAVE A HAND GU-" I was cut off by massive licking around my face.

"Smile?" I grinned as I petted the dog. "Your fur reminds me of cotton candy!!"

"AUDREY! Thank gosh your done with your introductions! You are done right?" Kasel said from a nearby couch. I nodded and brought smiley cotton candy with me as an adorable entertainment.