Sleep State

Chapter 14

- Ana -

The rapid flutter of her heart inside her chest left her stunned by his complete honesty. She had not expected an answer, nor did she want one, but if there was only one response he could give, she was glad it was that one. 

It was no surprise Christian had feelings for her, however, the strength of those feelings were not defined, not until now at least. Her cheeks flushed with warmth upon his disclosure and she sucked in her bottom lip again. 

A sudden rush of overwhelming emotion expanded in her chest and the air she breathed became thin. The last twenty-four hours had proven to be trying and tragic. The realm of possibilities continued to sprout like weeds rapidly and wild. She wasn't sure how many more surprises her fragile soul could handle. Never in her wildest dreams would she had conjured such a situation, but apparently her comatose state had.  

"You barely know me," she whispered. 

The obvious had been squashed like a bug over and over again. Yes, they were strangers, but strangers with an uncanny connection and attraction formulated by the pretend reality they had built together. 

"I know you well enough." Christian tilted his head down so their foreheads could touch. 

Did he? She barely knew herself.

"Christian ..." Ana sighed. 

If he was about to declare his undying affection for her, now was not the time. It would be too much, too soon. While she enjoyed his company in more ways than one, she enjoyed the idea of dissolving the barrier that kept her from the life she had hung on to only a room away more. Her discovery had blossomed a newfound hope and she was not about to let that slip from her hands. But, the way he touched her, stared at her, and searched her soul for the mutual affection he condoned for her had become an obstacle she did not know how to overcome. 

"I don't want to stay here," she recited her deepest desire. "Please, now we know the truth. Just think, we can finally be free. We can live again."

The disconnect of their skin to skin contact caused her gaze to falter. A heavy disapproval sounded in his moan she knew he thought she could not hear. "And what if we do leave this place? That doesn't guarantee anything." He huffed.

"It guarantees life." Ana responded quicker than expected.

"Life," Christian humored the notion. "You and I both know we have no idea what waits for us on the other side. For all we know, we could be walking into a life of complete bullshit."

"I'm willing to take that chance," her internal conflict swirled and grew inside her. 

He was right. With no memory and no clue to what waited for them past the bright light was slightly terrifying, but what waited for them on the dark side where light vanished and life ended was even worse. Half way between both was enough to drive one insane with time and she already felt herself falling under its spell. 

"What if we don't remember?" Christian pondered.

"Then we'll just be continuing the trend." Her lighthearted comment did not amuse him.

"Damn it, Ana." The heat from his forehead returned as it touched the cool skin on hers. "That's the thing. I don't want to continue the trend. I don't want to forget about you. I don't want to lose you." His soft voice caressed her soul. Damn him for making this harder than it had to be.

"But what if we don't forget. What if we remember all of this." She shined a light on the possibility. However, Christian wasn't as optimistic as she.

"Highly unlikely." He shut down the idea.

Ana filled her lungs with as much air she could breathe in and exhaled, "I don't want to forget about you, too." She closed her eyes tight. "But I can't stay here, Christian, and neither should you." If he was going to try to convince her otherwise between life and death, he clearly did not know her at all.