In the Shadows~zayn au~Completed ✅EDITING

~Chapter 47: While It Lasted~

Shorter update, but it goes with the last one to kind of make a big update together. Here's the rest of Louis' story 😭

"Excuse me?" Louis hissed.

"What?" Kalysta couldn't believe how this had turned out. "I have no respect for someone who so blatantly gives up on everything important!"

"That's enough, Princess!" Zayn interjected harshly. "Hear the whole story before you make snap judgments.

"Go on, mate," he whispered, patting Louis's shoulder.

Louis seemed smaller, somehow, as if her castigation had truly impacted him. "She's right," he whispered. "You're right." He looked up at her, and she could see the depth of his self-hatred. "Just please let me finish.

"My mother passed within a year, and my father didn't take it well. He became depressed and I didn't make things easier. My mother's death made me angry, hurt. I shirked my studies and went prancing about with the other kids outside the palace. Meanwhile, Liam began studying what I should have been studying and then some. My father mostly ignored me, and I took advantage of that.

"It came to a head a few months after I turned seventeen, when I found I was going to be a father. Her name was Valerie, the girl, and she was sixteen. We'd been seeing each other behind our families' backs. She was of a minor nobility, but she had the freedom I wished for, freedom to live her life without the weight of an entire country on her every decision. I got a taste of that freedom when we were together. She was truly lovely." He gave a sad smile. "I was unhappy with the development at first, because I worried a child would be an end to my perceived freedom, but I did love her and so I married her. My father was pleased, because he thought it would put an end to my acting out. I eventually grew to love the idea of becoming a father myself."

His next pause was the longest yet.

"The marriage was good while it lasted. She gave birth to the twins, but her labor was too hard. Despite the best midwives..." His voice faded and he stood up quickly, moving to the opposite side of the room, facing away from them. "I lost the woman I loved, just as my father had. I held Valerie's hand and watched that joy-light leave her eyes and felt the enormity of what my father had experienced all those years ago, or perhaps a portion of it. I realized then what my actions must have done to him. He'd lost his wife and I couldn't be bothered to do the simplest of tasks." His voice quavered, and she could hear the tears he must have been shedding.

It made sense that they'd all ended up here. First Zayn's emotionally fraught story and now this. Both these men suffered extreme losses at such a young age and she couldn't comprehend it. She had nothing to compare to this.

"It didn't stop there, though," Louis confessed next. "I couldn't bear the thought of staying. I still can't. There are too many memories haunting me here, my mum's death and Valerie's. I left. I left my elderly father to his rule, my eleven year old brother, and my own children because I couldn't face the idea of being a widower, a father, and a ruler. I fled to the sea."

He turned to face them now, his face tear-streaked but determined and frustrated.

"So no, I didn't want to mention all of this before." His voice was soft, but firm. "I know you don't understand it, and I don't expect you to. I've been gone for so long that there's no place here for me anymore. I'm more valuable with Zayn, and this cause is too important.

"You saw how it was when we arrived; I'm more like an uncle than a father to the twins, and Liam makes a better father, just like he makes a better ruler, and a better man.

"As you can imagine, Liam doesn't welcome my visits. What you witnessed is the most cordial interaction that Liam and I have had in the last several years. I couldn't be sure whether he'd even grant us audience. And there you have it." He took a deep breath. "I've bared my soul to you, confessed my faults. My irresponsibilities aside, it's about time you let me know just what's going on here."

A/N: That's all for now, folks, but I'll try to update again as soon as possible.

Love you bunches and I LOOOOOOVED your comments on the "steamy" chapter earlier. You all crack me up. You'll get your dirty deeds (done dirt cheap) in good time. ;)

~Kari~