In the Shadows~zayn au~Completed ✅EDITING

~Chapter 89: Conditional Refusal~

                  

                  

Aye aye aye, it's been so long since I updated!! I'm so sorry, guys! I've had a bit of writer's block and I've been a bit busier than usual as well. This is a long chapter, so I hope it makes up for it! There's a lot going on in this one!

Shoutout to saania12 because she voted on all the chapters of my story and it blew up my notifications and made me feel very nice. 😊

                  

Recap: Thomas moved around the bed and approached her. "It is never easy to take a life," he whispered, crouching next to her, "even one such as his. Mourn the part of your soul that shattered at the deed, but do not berate yourself. If it wasn't you, it would have been someone else. Be angry, be sad, but heal. This country needs you whole."

He left then, and she broke down completely.

When Delia came back in, Kalysta had pulled herself together.

"Are you well, Milady?"

"I will be," Kalysta breathed. "The funeral is today. My presence will be required, I'm sure. Do I have any black dresses appropriate for a mourning widow?"

"I can arrange something from your mother's wardrobe if necessary."

"See that it's done. And thank you."

"Do you need anything else, Milady?"

"Not yet, but thank you."

Delia left again, presumably to figure out Kalysta's wardrobe options for the funeral.

Kalysta simply sat next to Zayn, holding his hand and wondering just how likely he was to wake up. She spoke to him some, spouting mostly nonsense about how the days were getting warmer and summer would soon be upon them. Any topic of more heavy consequence would have to wait until her heart wasn't quite so raw.

All too soon, Delia came to fetch her and take her to try out the dress options. Kalysta tolerated it, eventually settling for one and donning it for the occasion. There were so many confusing things to ruminate on. She really was mourning. She had ended a life, a young life. Did people feel this way following a battle? Taking a life was a serious thing, no matter one's religion or lack thereof. It weighed on her heavily. Thomas had charged her to grieve and heal, but she wasn't sure how to do either. She couldn't entirely grieve for a man that had done such things to her, but at the same time she wasn't happy considering what had occurred. He had truly seemed apologetic, and more than that, she knew how he'd been raised. Was it his fault that he'd turned into a monster when he'd been raised by one? And more than grieving, how was she supposed to heal? The thoughts were enough to drive her mad.

She was joined by her father and mother for the funeral. They walked on either side of her, each in dark blue garb to mark the affair. The ceremony was to take place just outside of the city, and the funeral procession was a long one. No one had really gotten much of a chance to know this foreign prince, so there was no reason that so many should attend, but it was an open occasion, and an opportunity to see a royal affair take place. The commoners didn't get much of a chance to see their rulers personally and the nobles were there out of duty.

She led the funeral procession, stepping behind the priest, and she was closest to rock structure as they carried his silk-wrapped body into the mausoleum. Commoners were buried in the ground. Royalty was placed in the family crypt. Kalysta shuddered at the thought of being laid in death next to the man whom she'd killed and who had abused her so heavily. The tears on her face were real, but indistinguishable behind the translucent cloth that trailed down from her hair and covered her face. Words were spoken by the priest as the body was carried in, but she couldn't perceive them.