In the Shadows~zayn au~Completed ✅EDITING

~Chapter 99: Accept Joy~

Kalysta's POV

Kalysta had a difficult time keeping face with Zayn around. He sat with them at the Royal table at the feast and she felt likely to go mad at his proximity, though he wasn't sitting directly next to her. The entire group of council members had known him as just Ambassador Zayn. Now that he was no longer ill or carrying messages, they were eager to learn more about the man who had played such a crucial role in the organization of the resistance. And of course, he held himself with poise, humor, and grace in the face of their many questions.

The days wore on and those times in public were the most troublesome, for she had to pretend that his eyes on her didn't make her heart stutter or that his laughter didn't captivate her. He was truly charismatic, warm, and intelligent, as she'd always known, but now the rest of the world got to see it too. In a way, she lamented having to share the real Zayn with them all, for she had enjoyed having him to herself. That thought brought its own confusion, for he hadn't been "hers" in quite some time.

As was liable to happen, the council members asked her to invite Zayn to their pre-Treaty meetings, desperate as they were for insight into Mullingan and Bradian policies. She knew it was a good idea, for he was too valuable an asset to let alone and he was too desperate to please her to decline. It was the best thing to do, but she fought with the idea of having yet another part of her day taken over by him and the need to guard her feelings so strictly. At least when the two of them were relatively alone she didn't have to worry as much.

True to her word, she had created a time for them to spend together each day. Her morning ritual now was to get ready, feed Finley, walk with Zayn in the gardens, and then be about her usual Queenly duties. Those walks in the bitter cold were quickly some of her favorite times, despite the inevitable awkwardness. Their shared camaraderie was ever-present, but as they quickly found out, they couldn't be as free with their conversation as they used to be.

It was on one of these walks that she made the formal request for him to advise them on political matters. And he was more than happy to help, as she'd predicted.

"It will give me something to do," he added. "I feel quite... useless just staying as a guest here."

"With how much you used to travel I can imagine you feel restless as well." Her nonchalance fell short.

The look he gave her showed he saw right through her and the unasked question in her observation.

"Actually, I was referring more to having too much time on my hands," he corrected. "I'd been working on regaining my previous physical faculties completely while I was in Mullingar, by dueling with Mahir. When I mentioned coming here he declined the invitation to join me, saying that he needed to go see someone and "tie off some loose ends" as he put it. I haven't found anyone else to practice the sword with."

Kalysta laughed outright. "Yes, I'm sure he does have some loose ends."

He looked at her, confused. "Do you know something I don't? He hasn't mentioned anyone special to him when we've spoken."

She winced. "It's not my secret to tell." She felt an imbecile for blurting that out. Even if Zayn was privy to Thomas' predilections, it wasn't for her to share something so personal. "I apologize for bringing it up."

Zayn quirked an eyebrow, but didn't press it further.

"You don't talk about him," he ventured quietly, looking sideways at her as they continued walking.

Kalysta stiffened. "Him?"

"Finley."

This only made her slightly less anxious. "What do you want to hear about him?"