Healing Sophie (18+) - RH//DDLG

56 - Shadows & Substances

Ahhh, my writer's block has been RIDICULOUS I'm so sorry, guys 😭 Here, have 2 chapters on the house lol

Shadows slithered towards Sophie's ankles, encompassing everything around her as she curled up tight in the corner of the room. If she made herself smaller, they wouldn't see her, right?

Small blonde hairs stuck to Sophie's forehead as she tried to shake the nightmare from her mind. She was utterly alone. Her mom had left. Her dad was on a work trip. She had begged him to stay home by herself because she was a big girl, but honestly, she just didn't want to be a bother for Finn and Sherry. She always felt like a bother.

Sophie stood and straightened out her ruffled pajamas. She would not be afraid. She was big and brave and not afraid.

Just as she always did, Sophie picked herself up, ran herself a calming bath, and made herself a snack before crawling back into bed. All the things her mother used to do. All the things her father never did.

She was utterly alone and brave.




Sophie jolted awake, scaring away the forgotten memory. As she slowly came to her senses, she took a moment to remember where she was. Warm, fluffy bed. Full, happy house. No longer alone. Check, check, check. She took a deep breath, letting herself release every negative feeling. She didn't need those. She was going to be meeting her father later that day to talk through everything, and she needed to remember how to be that brave little girl again.

"Bambi." Sophie turned in her bed to face her favorite mischievous brown eyes. She was always taken aback by how breathtaking Theo was. His playful smiles and teasing always left her heart racing, a much different kind of racing from the dream she just had.

"Hmm?" Sophie mumbled. Speaking felt exhausting.

"You're so gorgeous."

A blush crept up onto her cheeks, and she rolled her eyes. "Shush, no, I'm not."

Theo's eyes darkened, and he grinned before moving on top of her. He leaned in and hovered his lips just above hers. Sophie huffed in frustration at the man, just wanting to feel his touch. "Say you're gorgeous."

"Theo," she whined. She tried to pull herself up to kiss him, but to no avail. The big dummy was slowly crushing her ribs, preventing her from moving. "You're heavy."

Theo gaped. "Are you calling me fat?"

Sophie giggled. "I'm calling you voluminous."

Theo chuckled and flicked his eyes to Sophie's lips, groaning as she licked them. "Bad girl, Sophie. Such a little tease." He ran a gentle hand across her cheek, brushing his thumb along her lip. "Say you're gorgeous, baby."

"I'm gorgeous," Sophie said distastefully. "Now, can you please kiss me?"

"So bossy." Before she could argue, Theo enveloped Sophie in a soft, warm kiss. She had little time to enjoy it before he pulled back and leaned his forehead on hers. "You've got this today, Sophie. We're all going to be there with you and we'll be there after. We can even go get some ice cream after if you want."

Sophie grinned. "Or Hello Kitty Café!"

Theo returned her grin. "Whatever you want, Bambi."




Sophie fidgeted with her straw nervously as she glanced at the table along another wall where her men, Benji, Connor, and Jesse sat. She fought back the grin that threatened to escape her lips as she took in her family. She loved them so much.

Someone cleared their throat, and Sophie tensed, turning to her father. "I'm really happy you agreed to meet me, Sophie."

She shuffled awkwardly and nodded. "So… Talk."

Jeffrey blinked at her bluntness and took a deep breath. His brown eyes were framed in bags, and his face was sunken. "I don't want to make excuses or try to justify anything. I know I messed up. I just want you to know all the facts and then whatever you decide, I will respect that."

Sophie studied him while he continued, trying to find the man who raised her. Nothing.

"I guess we'll start from the beginning. When your mother and I met, she was the kindest woman. She had her demons, but she always had a smile on her face. Our relationship was perfect until"

"Until you had me?" Sophie snapped.

"Until we got married," he clarified. "It was like the second we got married, she became this… monster. No one else saw it, or they laughed it off. She would scream at me, hit me, throw things at me, tell me I'm worthless. Yet despite all that, I really did love her. I wanted to help her get better. I tried getting her into rehab, therapy, and local meetings. Nothing worked. There's a different kind of pain in watching the person you fell in love with slowly kill themselves. There just wasn't anything in her life worth stopping for. Until you, Sophie. Your mom was so excited when she found out she was pregnant with you. It was the first time since before marrying her that I got to see her sober. She was doing so good for a few years. When you had just turned six, I came home early from work one day and found out that she was cheating on me. It was with her dealer. I was more scared than mad. I was afraid of what would happen to her if I left her completely. So I stayed with her. She left the house because I refused to let her near you while she was spiraling, but we stayed in contact. At first, it was once a month over the phone, just to make sure she was doing okay. But then, as she began responding less and less, I got worried. I started dropping by where she was staying. I told you they were work trips because I couldn't stand the thought of you seeing your mom like that. She was… a zombie. She was malnourished and aggressive. I wanted you to have a good image of her in your head."

Sophie's head spun as she tried to take in every word her father was saying.

"The in-person visits started with me just trying to get her out of the house to get her some food and make sure she was okay. But then I found out she was pregnant from her dealer. It was with your brother Connor. She tried to stop using and drinking while she was pregnant, but the asshole that knocked her up was abusing her and drugging her. She told me that the only reason she got pregnant was because he slipped her something and assaulted her. I think he damaged whatever fragments of sanity were left. I stayed by her side during the pregnancy to make sure her and Connor were okay. It wasn't easy, though. She was angry and had no one to take it out on except me. If someone keeps telling you you're worthless, you eventually believe it. It really started getting to me mentally. I felt trapped. I was barely hanging on a thread and had you to take care of. But then watching how happy you were with Finn and Sherry just made me feel like you were better off with them. I reached a really low point, Sophie."

Sophie's eyes watered. There was so much information coursing through her brain. How was one supposed to respond in a situation like that? It was too much for anyone to handle.

"I couldn't leave her because I was scared for her and Connor, but being around her was unbearable. So I just gave in. I started drinking and using it with her. I just needed something to escape the pain but still be close by to take care of them. I just wanted a little to relax my mind, but it got out of control. For years, I was destroyed by my body. I always made sure to hide it from you and Connor, though. I was ashamed and couldn't handle the thought of either of you seeing me like that. About a year ago, your mother and I had a huge fight because she was demanding to see you, and I wouldn't let her. She got mad and left to live with Connor's dad, and I got a house around here when I heard you were going to school here. I wanted to be close by in case I ever got my life together. When Connor's dad got arrested, Mavis and Connor had nowhere to go, so I moved them in with me. Every horrible argument ended in Mavis taking Connor and living at the shelter downtown. When you saw me at my house, I was mortified. I never wanted you to see me like that. I was angry at myself, and I took it out on you. And then… "Then your mom died. And I just thought about how horrible it is that you had to lose your mom twice. I felt responsible and ashamed. Missing her funeral was a wake-up call, though. You and Connor deserved so much better, and I'm so sorry, Soph. You deserved better."

Jeff finished and cleared his throat, wiping a few stray tears from his eyes. Sophie just sat across from him, stunned. She would have been fine, just simply hating her dad and removing him from her life. She was at peace with it, even. It was much easier. But of course, life is never so simple. There was always more to every story. Her dad was abused. He was insulted and degraded and physically assaulted. It didn't justify him abandoning Sophie, not even close. It at least gave her clarity, though. There was no longer a giant question mark hovering over her life.

"You don't have to say anything now, Sophie, okay? I know this is a lot. The ball is in your court. Whatever you want to do next, I will follow."

Sophie studied her dad's sullen face. "Are you clean?"

"I'm getting there."

Sophie looked over at her family, her real one, and smiled. There was Finn, who had been there since elementary school, taking her in and showing her what it's like to be loved. Then, there was Victor. He was actively working on all of his anger and trauma and showing Sophie that there's always a way out. A bad parent doesn't predetermine your life. Theo was a constant reminder to Sophie that it's okay to relax every now and then and not take life too seriously, even when it sucks. Sophie never really knew how to give up control until she met Chase. She was so used to taking care of herself, and he gave her a safe space to pass off control to someone else. Jess was the first girlfriend Sophie ever truly had, and she showed Sophie how to be unapologetically herself.  Benji helped Sophie get in touch with her little side. Lastly, there was Connor. The bright light came from all of the trauma and stress with her parents. Her life had changed for the better since he came into it. He was a bundle of joy to be around, which she always welcomed more of. The seven of them were her family, forever supporting her and lifting her up, and visa-versa.

Sophie sighed contently and turned back to her father. "I don't need you in my life, dad. I used to, but I haven't for a while now. But, I want you to be in my life. The you that I knew growing up. I want to believe that you can be that person again. I want to believe that you can put in the work and be better. Once you're completely clean, we can re-evaluate, but as of right now, I have my family."

Sophie stood and, without another word, turned her back to her dad and walked over to her family. She looped an arm around Victor and sighed.

"I love you guys, let's go get Hello Kitty waffles."




Sophie giggled as she looked around the bright pink table. Her, Benji, and Theo were coloring and talking about video games while they ate their colorful waffles. Chase was solving a puzzle on the coloring mat. Victor, Finn, and Jess sat on the other side, clad in black clothing. It was a hilarious sight to see.

"Problem, princess?" Finn asked, shooting Sophie a glare. She kept giggling and pulled her phone out, taking a picture of the three of them. Definitely wallpaper material. She showed the picture to Benji and Theo, causing them to bust out laughing. Finn raised a brow and smirked, pulling out his own phone. A moment later, Sophie's phone dinged with a notification.

Stop being a brat, or I'm going to take you to the bathroom and fuck you over the counter.

Sophie held in a yelp and tried to cover the rising blush on her face.

"Dang, lucky," Benji whispered from her left. She smacked him and quickly closed her phone, quietly digging into her waffles while Finn stifled a laugh.

Sophie frowned as a second fork appeared on her plate and looked up at Jess who was giving her dish a disgusted look. She brought a bite up to her lips and ate it. "Oh damn." She pulled the plate towards herself and began digging in as Sophie gaped. With perfect comedic timing, Jess looked up with a mouthful of waffle and mumbled, "What?"

Sophie just smiled and leaned her head on Benji's shoulder. "Nothing."

She wasn't utterly alone anymore. She was big and brave and not afraid.