𝑰𝒍𝒍 𝑭𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 ✎

[33]

Vaidehi's pov

I don't wake up to an empty bed this morning. Raghav is huddled next to me and I lazily stretch myself feeling fulfilled.

The sun has started to rise, I can see that through the windows. So I pepper kisses on Raghav's cheek to wake him up.
He stirs and opens his eyes slowly.

"Good morning, yuvraj." I tell him as he snuggles closer to me.

"I don't want to get up." He mumbles hiding my face in his chest. I chuckle as I push him off, forcing him to wake up.

"Its a long day. And I have my lessons in an hour." I get down the bed. Just as I take a step away from the edge of the bed, he pulls my hand.

"Vaidehi. I am sorry I came intoxicated last night." He apologises, looking at me with clear and worried eyes.
"I honestly don't understand how it got out of hand. The army general had called me for some briefing and then we ended up indulging a little bit which went farther than I wanted. Intoxicated two days in a row is not not something I want to make an habit."

"Two days in a row?" I question. I have no idea what he did the night before because he wasn't with me.

"Oh yeah...."He trails off. I look at him expectantly to give me an explanation but he stays quiet for a beat.

"Sit here." He pats the space in front of him and sits up on the bed as well.
I oblige. My heart thudding in my chest.
There has to be a good explanation for what I heard from his mother.

"The night I returned from Talya...day before yesterday's night....I umm..I was messed up in the head. With everything that happened with Rajkumari Maneka. I just hated it. I hated that I couldn't protect her perfectly as Samay would have wanted. He would have wanted me to let her continue to keep her place in Talya but I failed. Just another thing I failed at after failing to save Samay's life...." he sighs pained.

I immediately grips his hand. "Raghav can you stop blaming yourself-"

He interrupts me with a shake of his head. "Please don't."
I nod begrudgingly and let him continue.

"Okay...coming back. So after you told me that night that Rajkumari Maneka looked absolutely terrible with grief when you went to her quarters.  I just couldn't handle the guilt of ruining her life. I have uprooted her entire existence. And I...I indulged in drinks to get my mind of it." I am speechless. I don't know what to say at all. Raghav is blaming himself for things that are not in his hands. And he is also not letting me comfort him. The worst part, he is trying to take comfort in liquor.

"And I don't know how far gone I was that I got a stupid idea to go and apologise to her. I had extended my apologies to Samay's father back In Talya and he had sworn he didn't blame me. But with his wife. I didn't trust that she didn't blame me. So in my intoxicated state I went to her quarters and apologised."

"What exactly happened there?" I ask. I could have added that I am aware of the information that he exited her quarters only in the next morning. But I don't say it because I want to see of he tells me.

"I was there for a few hours...I umm...I...don't remember everything detail because I was quite out of it. But I do remember most. So...I knocked on her  door for a few minutes and then when she opened it she was very surprised to see me. I remember apologising to her immediately about disturbing her and about ruining her life and I don't exactly remember why she invited me inside her quarters. But she did. And after that we just talked for a while. She told me that it meant a lot to her that I saved her from basically being burned to her death and that she and Samay hadn't had connected that well so she was surprised that he cared enough to think about him when he taking his last few breaths. And yeah....we talked about things like that and then I think I dozed off there and when I woke up next morning it was already around six."