𝑰𝒍𝒍 𝑭𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅 ✎

[36]

Vaidehi

Its nightfall again. After the successful celebration of Raghavendra's mother and father's marriage anniversary, everyone retired back for the night.
And so did I.

But since I cleaned up and changed into something more comfortable than the heavy lehenga choli, I was wearing, something weird is gripping me, making me feel anxious and fidgety.

I don't know what it exactly is, I can't pinpoint the reason but as I wait by my window sill in my quarters, my stomach roils.
I don't know how long I stay like that, rooted in my spot.

But the next thing, that distracts me is the sound of my quarters door being pushed open. Raghav walks in.
He smiles at me. Softly, gently. His handsome face looking serene and sober. After two nights, I am finally seeing him sober.

My roiling stomach settles. With relief washing over me I run into his embrace. I hit him with a soft thud, he grunts and then grips my hip, chuckling.
"What happened?" He whispers.

I shake my head and just smile at him. He doesn't need to know my unnecessary turmoils. My brain can be a real pain sometimes, making up scenarios.

He was holding me with just one arm, so he puts another one around me too. And I feel a cool silhouette press into my back.

"What's in your hand?" I ask, turning my head to see it myself. He doesn't let me, turning my head back toward him by my chin.

His eyes harden. His smiles slips, just barely. But I catch the motion.

"Its a bottle." He tells me.

"What bottle?" The fear that had just passed me, comes over me again. My stomach is a pit and my heart drops to it.
He came here sober only beacause he planned on getting drunk with me.
The realisation is hard hitting and painful.

"Raghav what is going on?" I try to break free of his embrace, but he doesn't let me.

"Have you ever had a drink?" He asks. I shake my head. Ofcourse I haven't.

"I got this for you. I wanted you to try it." He tells me.

See, if he really thinks I am that stupid then he is doesn't know me at all.

"That is some bullshit. You wanted to drink again tonight, to numb your brain and you know I have a problem with you continously drinking, so you decided to bring it here and try to normalise it but acting like you want me to try it!"

This time I push away from him hard enough, he can't lock me in.

"Vaidehi....I genuinely wanted you to try it." He repeats.

"Okay, I am sure that was 10 percent of the reason too. But 90 percent you want to drink it."

He shrugs. "How about 50-50."

"Raghav, What's going on..." I cup his face. He leans into the embrace.
"At this rate, you will end up getting a dependance."

"I won't. I know how to stay in my limits." I wonder if he even believes himself.

"Really?" I drop my hand, "In the first four months of our marriage. I had seen you drunk like 2 times. And in this one week, I have already seen it five times. Are you not noticing a change?"

He takes a seat on the couch, setting the bottle on the glass table beside it. I assess the bottle, it has a dark liquid filling three-fourths of it.
"You are right. I have been drinking often. But you know the reason, I told you. So, how is it so wrong if I am using something to numb the thoughts for now. I know my limits and I will stop by the time I feel like it might be taking a toll on me. You are making it a bigger deal than it is."