Love Wins (BoyxBoy)

Chpt. 4- Thinking Out Loud (Trigger warning)

~Nico Di Angelo~

I watch as the paper turns orange, shrivels up, and falls off. I brush the ashes off of my pants leaving white smudges on my black pants. I throw the tiny cigarette on the floor then I jump down and step on it. I lightly kick it onto the pile that has been growing for months. As I change my pants I hear a lot of yelling outside, curious I go out to see whats happening. I see a group of Apollo kids carrying a stretcher from the infirmary to their cabin.

Where's Will? He's the head doctor, he should be there. Maybe he's busy.

I see one of Will's sisters, Kayla, crying into her boyfriend Malcolm's shoulder. I run over to see what's wrong. Kayla's my therapist, she knows all of my pathetic little problems.

"Kayla? What's wrong?" She looks up at me then she hugs me.

"It's will." She starts sobbing and I rub her back.

"What? What happened?" She continues to sob. "Kayla, what happened to W-" I stop and look at the body on the stretcher.

It's Will.

His wrist is slit from halfway up his forearm to his main blood circulation and then across his wrist. The one spot doctors can't stitch up. His face is pale yet red from crying. He looks awful.

This is all my fault.

"It's not your fault Nico, Will's been depressed for a while now."

Yes it is. It's all my fault.

"No Nico don't blame yourself you did nothing wrong."

Oh great, the voices are back along with the painful sinking feeling.

"Nico, sweetie you're thinking out loud."

I look a Kayla. Her eyes are wide and full of concern.

Am I really thinking out loud?

"Yes. We're going to talk about this later but right now we need to go to the infirmary. I need to take care of Will and your not allowed to be alone."

I put my head down and I slowly follow Kayla to the infirmary.

It's all my fault. I kept calling him stupid and other mean things like that. I always do. I'm always such a dick to him.

"Nico, it's not your fault. You didn't know he was like this."

"What do you mean like this? Like me?"

"Almost."

Almost?

Kayla points to the bed I always rest in when I'm in here and I sit down. One of the nurses, Austin, puts a blue band around my wrist. He goes to the medicine cabinet and pulls out a familiar yellow bottle. I lean back against the pillows and I put my hand out waiting for the blue and white pills.

"Sorry dude, I'm just doing what Kayla told me to do."

"It's fine." I whisper as I pop two pills in my mouth.

Now, I wait. Ludiomil usually takes about five or six minutes to work.

I put my earbuds in to drown out the sound of Kayla yelling instructions to the other doctors, and the sound of slow, short beeps from Will's heart monitor. I scroll through my "for when I'm alone" playlist and I put on the song The Forgotten by Green Day. I softly hum along until I get the familiar numb feeling.

It's all my fault.

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AN: Hope you enjoyed this chapter of Love Wins!! Don't forget to vote, comment, and share with fellow Solangelo shippers!!!