Too much to handle

chapter 21

Selah pov

I was cooking breakfast with Chaniece wanted to do a day just for all of us the boys and the kids while we were cooking Breakfast the boys went to the supermarket getting dinner for tonight. Elijah went with them so it was just us girls.

"So did u talk to August " selah asked

"Yea he said that he was just scared to loose me, I don't know why he would think I would just up and leave him one day" I said while flipping chocolate pancakes

"Uh oh men only do that when they did something wrong" she said taking out the bacon

"Really, I dont think so I don't think August would cheat on me or anything" I said

"Didn't u say that he was talking about another girl he got her pregnant and said he's falling out of love with u" she said

"But he said it to be a joke, August knows better" I said defended myself I was getting annoyed just because her relationship is the best  she has no right to be giving me advise

"U know selah just because your relationship is all perfect, that's doesn't give u the right to give me advise or say that my fiance is cheating on me, not everyone adores u or your relationship. Because last time I check u was running to me bout u and trey problems. "I said then stormed out the kitchen and went on the porch I took put a cigarette, yea I know it's bad I started smoking about 5 months ago when me and August was going through some problems.

I started smoking, then selah come out and snatch it away from me

"What u do that for " I said

"So your smoking now u are never like this, what's wrong with u " she said

"Whats wrong with me nothing is wrong with me What is wrong with u I'm tired of u thinking u better than me u always looked down on me . Just because I got pregnant at 15 and gave the baby up for adoption u think I'm a horrible parent and person. But wasn't u the one caught having sex In the girls bathroom at the age of 14 " I said through tears

"Chaniece why didn't u tell me" I heard Someone say behind me

"Baby I'm sorry I didn't tell u ok it's just it was hard to tell" I said trying to hug August but he pushed me

"I thought we wasn't keeping anything for each other a few months ago I asked for u to tell me everything" he said stepping back

"I know August but it's hard to talk about that I'm sorry August I'm so sorry" I said sobbing into his chest he wrapped his long arms around me and just held me and that's what I need. I knew he would understand but I knew once we get home it would be a whole another ball game.

Me and August made it home we walked to the bedroom and I stripped out my clothes and went in the shower I got out and put on my lace thong and bra and put ok my robe. August took a shower and put on boxers and sat in front of me

"So let's start from the beginning" he said

"Well my bf Devin was a senior and I was a freshman I was new to the school I didn't know anyone Devin he became my best friend but then one day he invited me to his house and things happen, I could of sworn I put a condom on him .so a few weeks later I started getting symptoms of pregnancy I took a Pregnacy test and it came back positive so I told Devin he told me to get an abortion and that he wasn't ready to be a dad, I mean neither were I ready to be a mom but I would've made sacrifices.

So I thought about getting an abortion but I said no babies are so precious so I wouldn't dare kill it So I gave it away to a white family. It was a boy I got to name him his name was Taj, I loved that name for some reason his name was Taj Devin and the adoptive parents last name.so after I gave him up I transferred schools and then I started my life and when I turned 20 I had lyric by Chris, I knew to Chris I would just be a one night stand because he was just starting out on his music career and he didn't need a gf at the time. He was such a jerk when I said I was pregnant. Well I'm part Chris I'm more focused on my future with u August" I said through tears

"Chaniece I wish u would've told me sooner" he said and pulling me on his lap and holding me this is what I needed I just needed him to hold me.

" I wish I did too, sometimes I wonder how's he doing, if I ever walked past him in the street and I wouldn't recognize him. " I said sobbing August put my head into his chest

"How bout u go to the adoptive parents house and see where he is" Aug said

"It's not that easy Aug they probably moved by now" I said

"Well u never know till u try" he said

"Why if he doesn't want see what if he hates me" I said

"He'll get over it, and he'll understand" he said

"Don't u think it's to soon" I said

"You had him at 15 and your 27 now so no it's not to soon" he said

"Fine we can go Friday" I said

"We" he said

"Yea we aren't u coming" I asked

"Only if u want me too" he kissed me

"I love u" I said

"I love u too baybeh" he said then we fell asleep.

Selah pov

Why did she have to bring that up now trey is asking me a million questions Do she really feel that I brag to much and I look down on her. I can't help it if her relationship falls apart like every other day and mines don't. I'll call her tm to see If I can fix anything, hopefully she'll listen we 'll know she's stubborn.

"Trey stfu and go to sleep we can talk about it I'm the morning" I said snuggling in the blankets. And talking asleep