Love Me.

Part 58

I know it's been sooooo long, but like i promised i will complete writing this story. so here's the next chapter... hoping you havet forgotten the story or you can always read again lol. Let's hope it doesnt take me months to update the next part again. i promise i will try.

Enjoy reading.

*****

You know those days when you look at the world with rose colored lenses? Everything is pink and beautiful. You smile at everyone who passes you and you generally just feel so happy.

I can't quite describe it, but it's a tingly feeling in your heart, like something poking it continuously to make you happy and you just can't stop smiling. Today felt like that.

It felt like I was finally healing, and oh my God, healing is beautiful. I felt like I was becoming my old self again, I wanted to talk to everyone I met and just tell them I was so happy, it was stupid.

Darshan's Sajna played in the background as I sang along to it, maybe someday this was going to be my wedding song. I could imagine walking down the aisle, dressed in a beautiful red outfit, getting married to Arnav and suddenly life felt like worth living again.

It felt like I had really healed, I was no longer bitter about the past, I could trust Arnav again, I could just go back to being me and just be happy about life again.

Our journey had begun so beautifully and even though we had hit some bumps in between, which I never thought I could heal from, I was finally ready to allow myself to feel happy again and to dream again, about being in love, about getting married and just doing all the things I had always dreamt of.

Manvi waved at me from the side of the road, I drove towards her and parked my car aside so she could get it.

She sat down on the passenger seat as I drove of humming along to the song while she looked at me with a huge smile on her face.

"So... are you ready to get married?" Manvi smiled at me.

"What gave you that impression? I laughed

"Your music... you are predictable like that."

I just smiled and concentrated on driving, yes I was thinking about it but I wasn't quite sure yet, maybe in a few months I would be ready though, I had just come to the realization that I was finally healing, so I needed to give myself time before jumping into it right away.

Also I wasn't sure how Arnav felt, yes we were living together and healing together, but I had no idea if he was quite there yet, maybe someday we would have a discussion about it.

"I don't know... I feel great, I feel happy, I feel like maybe in the near future I might want to get married, but deep down, even though I hate to admit it, I know there's a part of Arnav's heart that will always love Sona and it still scares me. I know he chose me but how I deal with this information?"

And suddenly, the rose color was fading, everything still seemed beautiful, but I dint know how to get rid of this fear, the fear that maybe someday he would choose her, it dint make sense, it was stupid to even think about it, but it was there and I had to deal with it.

"And to know that you will love him with all your heart, because he is your first and maybe your last, so he will have you all to himself, but to him, his heart space is shared, I get it." Manvi nodded.

You see this girl, this is how I know she's my best friend, she gets me, she understand me, she can put my feeling into words better than I can. How lucky am I to have her in my life?

"What do I do? I don't want to dwell onto the past, I want to move on, I want to make decisions and I want to stop being scared about anything, even about losing him." I asked as I pulled over to the parking lot.