Fire in the Nothing (Jardougall)

Chapter 4

Thank you guys for the feedback! I'm glad you're enjoying reading it as much as I'm enjoying writing it :)
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I found it especially hard to get out of bed on Friday morning. I had finally started Lexapro and it was making me really drowsy. One of the many side-effects to be expected, I was told. It was 7:45 and I was still trying to get out of bed. I would really need to talk to Tay about taking the weekend off from yoga. Maggie knew I was awake and was waiting impatiently by her food bowl, so I managed to drag myself out of bed and fill it. Once up, I slowly got dressed and slugged out the door to the studio, yawning the whole way.

"Wow, good morning, sleepyhead," Tay teased me mid-yawn as I pushed the door open.

"Sorry, I haven't been sleeping well," I fibbed. I didn't want to talk about my meds this morning. "I just need some caffeine, I think."

She nodded in understanding. "What do you say we skip yoga this morning and get some tea?"

I shook my head. I was really enjoying the morning yoga and didn't want to skip. "No, I really want to do yoga. I'm off work this morning though, so we could grab breakfast after? If you want to, I mean."

She smiled. "Sure, that sounds great."

I tried to hide my excitement as we dove right into our morning practice. Around 9 AM we wrapped it up and headed over to a little vegan smoothie bar that Tay was really excited to show me. I was unconvinced that a smoothie would be a substantial amount of food, but when we got a seat and I had the smoothie bowl in front of me, I was unsure I would even be able to finish it.

"This is huge," I said to Tay.

She laughed. "I know. Sometimes it lasts me until lunch!"

I dug in, and it was delicious, and probably the healthiest meal I had eaten in days. My meals had consisted of frozen foods or the occasional fruit. Tay seemed to always eat healthy, even at the greasy little diner where options were mainly eggs and bacon. I looked around at the smoothie bar and it occurred to me for the first time that Tay must actually be vegan. I decided to ask.

"How long have you been vegan for?"

She looked happy that I had noticed. "About 3 years. I was vegetarian for almost 5 years before that, but when I started training to be a yoga teacher, I felt like it just wasn't a good combination. It didn't feel right in my body."

"I bet I know what you mean," I said honestly. "But actually, about the yoga... I'm honestly really enjoying it, but I think I need the weekend off. I'm so insanely tired lately."

"Oh, no problem," she said sympathetically. "Is it getting too much? If you're too busy with work, I totally understand. No pressure to keep it up..."

"No! Not at all." I felt like giving her the real reason. I'm not sure why, it just came out. "I've recently started a new medication and it makes me really drowsy."

"Oh, like pain meds? I was crazy tired on Percocet after getting my wisdom teeth out," she giggled, her eyes flashing in what looked like... recognition?

I laughed lightly. "No actually, um... antidepressants," I said carefully.

She looked momentarily surprised at that, but nodded quickly. "Well, no worries. Take the weekend off. But it's back to the grind on Monday, got it?" She said in a fake stern voice.

I laughed and gave her a thumbs up.

"So, what's that accent I'm hearing? Are you from Australia?" She gracefully changed the subject.

"Yeah, I moved here from Australia about 2 years ago. I came to study finances at NYU, but I dropped out last year. I, uh... couldn't afford it." I was a little embarrassed to be sharing so many private details with her but she made me feel so comfortable and was really easy to talk to.