Lost boys

Confessions

Dean rested his head on the school desk before class started. He was all tired since he didn't have a lot of sleep because thoughts were running through his head for hours. He was about to fall asleep when his teacher started the first class. He sat up straight sort of ignoring the person next to him. Dean really wanted to know if there was anything between Cas and Benny. But he didn't want to ask him right away. Dean glimpsed at Cas when the teacher was writing down the tasks they had to solve today. "Cas?" Dean whispered. No response. "Is there something going on between Benny and you?" He whispered and now faced the person next to him completely. "We're still figuring out about this thing between us. He's cute though." Castiel now answered. Dean only nodded. He let those words go through his head. What was he even complaining about, he had no right to be sad. He had his chance but didn't use it. Again Dean glimpsed over to Cas and saw that he had his phone outside and texted Benny. They actually wrote cute stuff.

Suddenly Dean stood up, gripped Cas by his shirt and pulled him up. "We need to talk." Without caring what their teacher would say or if Cas wanted to come with him, he pulled him outside. The last time just the two of them were out in the hallway, they fought and ended up almost making out. "What's your problem, Dean?" Castiel asked when they were outside. "I need to tell you something." Dean told. "Wow, that can wait for the rest of the period. I don't want to miss it." Castiel turned around and was about to leave again but Dean gripped his wrist and pulled him back. "Why should I even talk to you? You most likely raped me, then ignored me for a week and now you want to talk?" Castiel looked straight into Dean's eyes. "Oh, so it was rape in your eyes." Dean's voice got quiet. He thought Cas enjoyed it. He trusted him with what Dean was doing. "Yes. I didn't actually want you to sleep with me." Castiel bossily said. Dean couldn't face Cas any longer. His head went down and he slowly let go off his wrist. "Talk, Winchester." Castiel commanded. Dean didn't want to talk anymore. Even that small talk they had put him to the ground. But he had to. Otherwise it would be too late. "Cas, I.. I fell in love with you." Dean stuttered. "Oh did you? Dean, you know I don't just want to be some kind of toy to you. You don't need to act like you love me just to get me. I don't want to be your amusement puppet. I don't want to be your fucking sex toy. " Castiel's voice cracked when he told that. "You've hurt me multiple times Dean. I'm sick of you hurting me. You step into my life and somehow get my weakness. I told you I'd do anything to protect you but I'm not quite sure if I still want to. You kiss me like there was more. You slept with me and took my virginity and say that there's nothing and it was just some fun. It hurts Dean! I felt something for you almost since the very first time I met you. And now you come here and tell me you love me when I'm about to conclude with this shit? I can't believe this, Dean." Tears were running down Cas' cheek. Now that Dean knew how much he had hurt Cas, he hated himself more than ever.
"I'm sorry I was such a douche bag. I was just to blind to see how I seriously affect people. How much I actually hurt people. How much I've hurt you. Now that you told me all of that I hate myself even more than I actually did before. But when I saw you with Benny last night something inside me felt weird. I felt a little crack. I finally noticed what I was missing all the time. I was so stupid for not listening to my brother. He told me so many times that I need to take care of the things I do. I was just too naive. But Cas, this time I'm completely honest and also completely sure that I'm in love with you. " Dean cried.
Now both of them stood there. Crying on the hallway of their school. "Forgive me Cas. Give me a second chance. Everyone deserves one." Dean sobbed. Silence. The only thing they heard was each other's snivels. "I forgive you." Cas whispered and Dean fell into his arms. Both of them hugged each other real tight. Cas lifted his head up to kiss Dean, who returned the kiss immediately. "I promise I won't do anything, you don't want me to do, anymore." Dean whispered when he snuggled his face into Cas' shoulder.

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"Could you talk to Dean about yesterday?" Gabriel asked Sam when they were walking towards the park. "No. He locked himself in his room and didn't come out until today morning. But he looked all tired and sad if you ask me." Sam explained. They were looking for a great spot to sit down and enjoy a great picnic and enjoy the sunset. "There?" Gabriel pointed to a spot near a little sea. Sam nodded and they made their way up to their spot. Sam helped Gabriel put down the blanket and placed their basket on it. After it they sat down and smiled at each other.
"By the way, did your Dad show up again?" Gabriel bit into his sandwich. "Luckily not. I don't want to know how much longer it will take until he comes back." Sam told and laid down looking into the sky. "Just tell Cas, when he's making trouble again." Gabriel smiled. "Not quite sure if Cas would still want to show up after everything between him and Dean." Sam sighed. "He has to. You're a part of my life and each one of us brothers swore that we're going to help the people, that make us happy, out when they need it." Gabriel told. Sam was surprised by that fact. Their family was a really strong and great one. Sam always wished for a family like that. He doesn't even know how his mother looked like. Well only from pictures but he had no memory of her. Sam actually never really knew why the Novak's parents weren't home whenever he visited them. "You never told me about your parents." Sam mentioned and turned to face Gabriel. "They're on an important job far away. That's everything you need to know." Gabriel explained. If that was the only thing Gabriel wanted to tell about his parents it was okay. Sam accepted it. Gabriel finished eating his sandwich and laid down next to Sam. For a couple of hours they rested like this but then they sat up straight to watch the sunset. "Sit between my legs." Gabriel said and split his legs. Sam slipped between Gabe's legs and leaned back against him. When he was comfortable, Gabriel wrapped his arms around Sam and they both watched the sun go down.
Again they laid down and started to watch the stars. It was a quiet night and it was beautiful. The sky was clear and they could see everything. "Look Sam! A shooting star!" Gabriel pointed to the sky. And he was right. "Did you make a wish?" Gabriel asked Sam after a while. "Yes." Sam answered. "Tell me." Gabriel turned his head towards Sam. "It's not going to come true if I tell you." Sam smiled and softly kissed Gabriel.

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Two chapters today, just for my friend Milly who wanted another one that badly even though she's asleep right now, I think. Next chapter is probably going to be a more special one. See ya then!