Irresistible

Chapter thirteen

I'm excited! There's only one more chapter after this one and that't it! Enjoy chapter thirteen!

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"If one of your close friends asks you be his girlfriend, would you say yes?" Nathaniel asks when we walk into my apartment. I put down my towel on the chair, hanging so it could dry. When I turned to face Nathaniel, he was looking right at me. He had already put down his towel. "Would you?" He asks once more. I look down at my feet then look back up to him.

"I don't know." I look around the apartment, trying to avoid eye contact with the man standing in front of me. He takes a few steps closer to me and I question his movements. I put on the white v-neck that was on the kitchen counter. The t-shirt went down to my mid thighs.

"If your best friend confessed that he has been in love with you since 5th grade, that all he wanted was you to be his but he didn't want to mess up a perfectly good friendship so he stood quiet, what would you do?" He doesn't lose eye contact which intimates me. I take a second to process what he just said to me. I shake my head no.

"That's impossible." I say in a whisper but he tells me to speak up. "That's impossible, no one could be in love with me." I look up at him and he takes a step back as if he has been pushed.

"How could you say that?" He questions me.

"Because its true." I whisper. I honestly don't think anyone could love me. I'm broken and I have so many relationship issues. I don't want to get close to anyone because I feel like Im going to break their heart.

"No it isn't. Catherine, I'm in love with you." He swallows. I shake my head no once more.

"Please, no." I beg. He cannot be in love with me. I don't want him to be. I don't want a relationship with him, I will break him. I don't even trust myself with another guy. I can't imagine losing someone I care about let alone someone who is insanely important to me. The thought of Nathaniel walking out of my life makes me want to bawl.

"I'm utterly in love with you Catherine." He takes a step closer to me. I'm not sure how to react. No one has ever confessed their love to me, let alone my best friend.

"You're not in love with me! No one can be in love with me. Do you not get this?" I raise my voice. "No one could love a cold hearted girl. Go away, before you end up broken like me. I told you my problem before! Why can't you get the hint?" Tears start to fall from my eyes. No one is speaking. I still don't make eye contact with him.

"I am so in love with you Catherine." He walks slowly towards me. "You're perfect in every way. yes, you have your flaws but I overlook them because how much I adore you. I had fallen for you a long while ago. I didn't know how to cope with it until now. Laughing with you on the couch, you getting mad at me when I accidently drop a chip on myself.." He smiles to himself, reminiscing those memories. "You're my happy place, Catherine. You're home to me." He places his hand on my cheek, forcing me to look up at him." I have loved you ever since I first saw you."

"Nathaniel please." I beg but I'm not sure what exactly I'm begging of him. Tears are escaping my eyes.

"I know it scares you. Hell, it scares me but I want you Catherine. I want you in every way another human wants another. You're the one I want to be with. It has always been you, I was just too stupid not to realize it. I put up with your attitude, your phobias and your annoying sounds. I always forgive you when you mess up and that goes with you as well because I do mess up a lot. I just-" He want to continue but I stop him.

"I can't give you what you want." I whimper.

"We're not going to end bad. I will be here by your side." He coos. I look up at him. He is holding a straight face. I don't even know if I want a relationship with him. I do even see him as more as a friend? I sniffle as Nathaniel slowly walks towards me, wiping the tears off my face. His hazel eyes look so valuable. I feel so weak for crying in front of him. His hand is on my cheek, I'm looking up at him. He breaks the gaze then looks down at my lips. My mouth is open slightly as his thumb runs over my bottom lip. He takes his bottom lip in between his teeth then leans into me ever so slowly. His thumb is replaced with his soft lips. I don't kiss back right away but then I'm takeover by this moment and completely give in. I throw my arms around his neck bringing him closer to me. He puts me on top of the kitchen counter still kissing me, his hands settle on my thighs and at the hem of the t-shirt. His hands roam around my body. He then lifts me up, taking me into the bedroom and sets me down on the bed gently. He stops kissing me and just stays on his knees looking at me.

"You're so beautiful." He says in a whisper then continues to kiss me passionately. I wrap my legs around his waist as he goes to kiss my neck. Pressure is building up in me, I'm so caught up in the moment. I tug at the hem of Nathaniel's shorts until he stops me.

"Whoa, what are you doing?" He looks at me as he rests his hand on my hip. I'm slightly embarrassed.

"Take me, please." I close my eyes and reopen them.

"But, It would be your first time." He informed. "I don't want you to regret it and-" He wants to continue but I shut him up with a kiss.

"I'm not going to regret it."

"Are you sure?" He questions.

"Yes." I giggle. He gives me a small smile then kisses my lips softly. His hand travels up my shirt, taking it off slowly. Even though he isn't my boyfriend, he has shown me how much he cared and loved me enough to take me. Clothes were taken off and now we took this under the sheets.

"Are you really sure?" He demanded.

"If you ask one more time, I'm going to be mad." I throw my head back. He laughs and says okay. A few moments later, I hear a sound of a wrapper. I look at what Nat is holding.

"Do want to help me put this on?" He shows me the condom. I feel my face turning red and nod my head. I take it from him and place the silky condom on nathaniel. I still can't believe this is happening. it feels so surreal. Once it's on, I lay back down followed by Nat on top of me. He first kisses my lips then asks if I am ready. I hesitate at first but then nod. He kisses me once more then I feel the condom brush against me, causing me to shrug. Moments later he presses against me. One arm is around his neck and the other is under his arm. My fingernails are raking Nat's back as I hear myself gasp.

"Are you okay?" He asks. I silently curse under my tongue and get out a breath in response. I knew having sex would hurt the first time but this is so painful. Nathaniel moves further into me and I wince at the pinching feeling deep inside of me.

"Can I move?" His voice is raspy. I nod my head as the pain continues. He leans down to place a kiss on my lips. I watch him as he slowly rolls his hips against mine.

"You're doing so good." He tells me. I try not to think about the pain and start thinking about this moment. Nathaniel's eyes screw shut as he rolls his hips a tad faster. The pain faded but the uncomfortable feeling is still there. It doesn't take long for Nathaniel to come undone. He looks so beautiful. His eyes open and close to the pleasure, strands of his black hair is stuck on his forehead. He's on his left elbow as his other arm is stretched out. Soft moans escape his mouth as he comes undone and his hips slowly comes to a stop. I feel that familiar pinch in the bottom of my stomach. My hands immediately grip the bed sheets as I moan quietly.

"I love you, Catherine." Nathaniel kisses my forehead.

"I love you, Nathaniel." I've come to realization that I do love Nathaniel. I tried to refrain the thought of loving Nathaniel but I couldn't do it. He's stuck in my brain. I promised myself I wouldn't let him complete me. He took me slowly. He made me fall for him slowly. I compared everyone to Nathaniel. I wish I had a thousand words for love but all that came to mind was him and I realize that now. I built up walls around my heart because I was afraid of love but he tore them down just by his smile. I want to fall so in love with him. I gave myself to him.