Not so Heroic After All

Welcome to S.T.A.R. Labs

Central City Picture News was buzzing with frantic energy. Reporters were running back and forth, this way and that way, all workjn the latest hot topic for the news coverage later today. 

Barry maneuvered his way around, spotting Iris across the room. She no longer had that devastated look on her face that had been there since Eddie died. Now she had a purpose, a determination. She looked busy. 

"Iris!" Barry called, making his way over. She spotted him and actually smiled, opening her arms for a hug. 

"Well hey Mr. Unavailable. Where have you been for the past week?" Iris asked, hugging him. He tried not to read to much into it, as he so often did. Iris let go, pulling back to receive the answer to her question. 

Barry just shrugged. "Around. There hasn't been much crime lately so I'm kind of out of a job," he started to say before Iris gave him a look. Then he added, "On both ends." 

"Oh really? Because it didn't look like you were out of the job when you barged into C.C. Jitters and scared Violet half to death." She crossed her arms. "What was that all about?" 

Barry felt it again. That weight in his heart that kept poking and prodding at him. Guilt. 

"Yeah, about that... Have you seen Violet lately? I can't seem to find her anywhere. I wanted to apologize for the way I've been acting towards her, but it's like she dropped off the face of the Earth."

Iris looked concerned, as if she hadn't known Violet was missing either. "Well where did she go? Is she in trouble? We need to find her-" She started pushing past people, moving towards the front doors. 

"Whoa Iris, wait a sec. We've been looking all week and we still haven't been able to find her. That's why I came to see you. I thought maybe she had contacted you...?" 

"Why would you think that?" Iris demanded. Did he know about Violet already? Had she told him everything? 

"Well you were the last person to see her other than me, so I thought maybe..." Barry hinted. 

Iris shook her head. "Sorry. I haven't gotten a call or text in ages. I can't really help you."

Barry felt bad for not talking to Iris. She needed him. He couldn't just leave her alone because he felt responsible for Eddie's death. He had to do something about it instead.

"What time do you get off work?" Barry asked, suddenly excited. They could go see the newest scary movie, and then hit up that Brazilian restaurant with that awesome meat because he was really hungry from running all the way here and- 

And he was doing it again. Hoping for a chance with Iris that would never come. She didn't want him that way, and especially not right after Eddie died. 

"I get off at 6:00, why?" Iris asked. He wasn't actually asking her out, was he? Because if he was then she wouldn't be able to say no, because who knows when she'd actually see his face again. Or when she'd get a chance to tell him she had liked for a while now. Nearly as long as he's liked her, it's just their time was never right. But maybe now...

Iris felt guilty once again. Eddie knew that she loved Barry during their relationship. He confronted her about it. She was never the girl to back down from an argument or admit that she's done wrong, but maybe she should have caved just that once. If her and Eddie had properly broken up, if she had just told Barry and Eddie about who she really loved, maybe he would still be here. 

Iris knew Barry blamed himself. She could see the guilt written all over his face every single day. It killed her inside to lie to him. But she just wasn't ready to jump into a relationship. And she didn't want Barry to wait for her anymore. He had wasted his entire childhood loving her, and she had done the same, but neither of them were brave enough to tell the other. In her opinion, that was a sign that it just wasn't meant to be.