Fifty Shades of Sherlock (A Johnlock/Mystrade fanfiction)

Chapter One

"Mycroft," Sherlock Holmes (the aspiring novelist, artist, matchmaker, etc.) regarded his older brother with a sharp gaze. "I think you need to find someone to else to bother."

John Watson, Sherlock's four-year flatmate, was out working at St. Bartholomew's Hospital as a doctor, so he couldn't be here to see the two fight (he normally found their little bouts comical). He was also normally the mediator in the relationship, which would probably explain why this conversation was currently in progress.

"If I had someone else to bother, do you think I'd be here arguing with you of all people? Honestly, you're so slow sometimes," the other Holmes replied with a roll of his eyes. Sherlock hadn't a clue why, but it somehow bothered him greatly that Mycroft was sitting in John's chair as though he belonged there.

The novelist leered and crossed his legs in the chair across from his brother. "Oh, I'm the slow one?"

"Yes, you are. And if you seem slow to me, Sherlock, can you imagine what real people are like? I'm living in a world of goldfish..."

Sherlock snorted as though saying 'As if,' but went along with the thought anyway. "Then maybe it's time you found yourself a goldfish of your own."

Mycroft's eyes widened as he made to stand up. "Change the subject. Now."

Sherlock's lips tightened more (if that was even possible). "Oh please. The only company you've kept since you gained your position is your PA."

"What are you trying to suggest?" The ginger man's eyes narrowed at the younger Holmes. Sherlock raised an eyebrow at him and he realized exactly what he was suggesting. "I'm not lonely, Sherlock. I honestly don't know how you could think such a thing..."

"Plain as day."

"What is?" A voice sounded from the door-John's voice, Sherlock's mind specified. The door shut and, after hanging his coat up, the doctor was back in his chair across from Sherlock. He pulled a face at the warmness found there already.

The brothers were both silent before Sherlock flicked his gaze back to Mycroft. "The fact that Mycroft is terribly lonely and I'm trying to convince him to find someone to date."

The blond laughed at that and said, "Really? Mycroft?"

The man in mention rolled his eyes and headed toward the door. "In any case, I wish you luck in your own romantic... endeavor." The comment gained confused looks from both men still seated, making Mycroft chuckle. "It would be unwise to keep yourself romantically uninvolved as well, brother mine. It was nice seeing you John." And with that, he flashed smile and made his way out of 221b.

John looked back to Sherlock after the door closed. "What was all that about?"

"Oh, his usual drivel," the brunet said, making a displeased grunt. "Though, I was serious when I told him to find himself someone. It'll get him off my back." He hummed as his mind set to working out a plan, a smirk coming to his face.

"Uh oh." John knew that look. "What do you have planned now?"

"Nothing major. Just doing my brother a favor by getting him a date." As much as Sherlock wanted to retch at the thought of him engaging in that sort of activity...

"Yeah but," the doctor looked appalled. "he's Mycroft bloody Holmes! The I-don't-do-unnecessary-socializing British government official! How is he ever going to agree to that?"

Sherlock's smirk grew. "He's not. It's just going to happen and he won't have any control over it." He laughed. "And it'll drive him absolutely mad."