The Second Chance {Tyler Carter}

Waiting

Weeks felt like years, and by the second week of him being gone, I was losing my mind. Just two more weeks or so to go. Halfway there. It was incredibly hard being without him; harder than I had ever imagined. It felt like I was losing him for the second time, but I knew I wasn't at the same time.

I was looking for work to make enough money to stop having Tyler and my parents pay for me. Yet with Jenna being on summer break, I couldn't find a single job. I simply felt useless just sitting on a couch all day, but no one would hire me.

The tattoos on my arms sure didn't help either, and nor did not going to college. Even online jobs became impossible to find.

How could I keep living like that?

I sat by the phone that evening hoping Tyler would call. He'd been too busy to call that morning, but his calls were literally the highlight of my day. I'd FaceTime him when I could, but I understood he was just a busy man.

The frustration just built knowing how stuck I felt and was. I just had pretended I was fine when he called so he wouldn't worry. He already had the pressure of balancing a new record and the tour, so he clearly didn't need any added stress.

I kept having to resort back to by breathing treatment machine when anxiety made it hard to breathe. Everything just seemed to close in around me leaving me feeling useless. The only things keeping me sane were his calls, Jenna, and Axel who alternated who's bed he slept in each night.

Sometimes, I caught the scent of Tyler's cologne on one of the pillows, and that was enough to keep me asleep. Other nights I just laid awake until morning light shined though the blinds.

How did I functionally live seven years without him in the first place?

It was around 11pm that night, and I was starting to lose hope that he'd call that day. It's not that I ever doubted him at all; I knew he would never be anything less than faithful. I just missed him.

I decided to look up the interview link Issues' Twitter put up that I hadn't watched yet to pass the time. It was only about ten minutes long, but I knew hearing his voice would put me at ease.

The interview was some young woman I had never heard of, and it was only Tyler this time. It pissed me off how she was clearly hitting on Tyler off and on, and he looked pretty antsy and uncomfortable. She asked questions about the bar fight midway through, and then Tyler was finally able to talk a little without her flirting with him. Then, as soon as he mentioned a girlfriend, she asked who I was "for the fans" which made me nervous.

Tyler and I still kept our relationship pretty private, and no one really knew who I was. The interview would be the first where he actually had to talk about me so I paid close attention to what he said. I prayed his fans wouldn't find my social media or anything so I could stay out of the public eye.

"Umm, she's this amazing girl who I've known since I was five years old. I just finally got the balls to do something about it," he smiled awkwardly while looking down at the ground. His face was red which cracked me up.

"Can you tell us a little about her?" the chick asked.

"I guess," he chuckled,"Kay, if your watching, please don't kill me for this."

"Oh my god, Tyler," I giggled to myself.

"She and I just go way back, and we recently reconnected a little while back for the first time since I was sixteen. I finally got to say the things I wanted to say. It's been kind of crazy lately with everything that's been happening, but you know I love her and I wouldn't have it any other way. I miss my girls more than anything right now honestly."