SENPOEMTATO

Just a Fan

I stared at your photo, whenever I'm down.

Makes me go crazy and smiled like a clown.

As i stare at your eyes, nose, lips and face.

My heart pounds crazy just like, i'm in a race.

So I put my phone away and rolled in my bed.

Trying to avoid you, but still see you in my head.

Messing my hair as I stretched in my comfort

As I daydreaming, about you, me at the airport.

Squealing like a pig, then moaning like a whale.

Always trying to stop my feelings but always fail.

Crazy imaginations coming as I read about your fanfiction

Now I can't help it, as it becomes my guilty obsession.

I always listen to your songs at any circumstances

Never gets old, coz my feel inside still dances

Especially whenever it's your part that's playing

Oh, i can't help it but to do a hysterical lipsynching.

Daydreaming about you and me is what I get

Thinking of possibles scenarios on how we'll met

Daydreaming about me and you,

Till we're both at the altar saying "I Do."

Us, sitting on the couch while cuddling together,

As we're having an outing with you and the members.

From you, taking care of me, as I'm having our first baby

Till video recording all the fun stuffs we did as a family.

I'll be the luckiest person to live if it really happens

But in reality, I don't know if you know my presence.

For me you're the apple of my eye, my one and only.

But for you, i know that you don't even fuckin know me.

A fanmeeting, personally is every fangirls dream

Also the concert where you perform with your team.

The time you threw out your white hanky and i've caught it

Also the time those fangirls got jealous, well, let's face it.

When you said "I love you", as you look at me, sincerely.

But when I look back, there's a million of us. Like, Seriously.

I shout your name so much and so loud as I can be.

But you answer back, addressing to US not on me.

It's a struggle, that there's so many of us who loves you unconditionally

But I'm still waiting here believing that someday you'll meet me eventually.

I know its a poor one-sided-kind-of-love-thingy.

I don't care, coz for me, you'll always be my baby.

Time came that we took our lives to another level

You and the members, will meet "the one" and fell

We still accept it and hope you're doing well.

Even if inside, it rots and hurts like hell.

Now we became mature, and both have our lives

While you and the members now, are with your wives.

Now you have your family, and now I have mine.

Knowing at the end, it's not you and me, it's fine.

It's a rollercoaster ride since the moment that you came

We're still so young at that time, but who can't blame.

I've known you for so long, starting the day i knew your name

Till it came, that you focus on your family and ended your fame.

As the time shifts so fast as now we're getting old

I'm till listening to your musics that still so bold.

Even tho my grandchildren called it as an oldie song,

Who cares it reminds me of my youth, as i sing along.

Sitting in my chair,staring at the sunset with your hanky in my hand

My memory gets blurrier, as I can't remember the name of your band

Seeing the beauty of the sun as it reminds me the day I knew you

Slowly closing my eyes, as the suns fading, I smiled. Saying "Thank You"

It's good to know those things that happened when we're younger

Are now the memorable sweetest things that I will just remember.

Even if you never knew me, but you're still my stan

It's fine, coz you know, I'm proud by just being your fan.