Lost in Thought

Chapter 14

The next day was a quiet one. None of us had really processed the events of the day before, but Ron's absence was one we constantly felt. He was never much of a talker, but we missed our leader. He guided us, gave us purpose and direction. Without him, there was a void and none of us seemed sure of what to do.

As we walked, Xavier stayed several paces ahead of us. I could tell that losing Ron hit him the hardest and he wasn't ready yet to be among friends. I get that. It's hard to lose someone who means a lot to you and we all feel like we could have or should have done more to help him. In the end, though, I realized that we really couldn't. We tried, but Dessel had it in his mind during that entire scene that Ron wasn't going to walk away. We were damned if we did and damned if we didn't.

Hulk, Michelle and I stayed back, walking a bit more slowly. Hulk was distracted by many things, yelling at birds that flew close enough to him or being startled by a sudden blowing leaf. He could talk, but he was still 100% dog.

The silence between Michelle and I being too much to bear, I broke the silence.

"Are you going to be okay? What happened back there..." I trailed off. "That would have been tough for anyone to see, but I know what Ron meant to you guys. Hell, he was starting to mean a lot to me, too."

Looking down at the ground as she walked, Michelle didn't look up when she answered.

"I have no idea what to think anymore," she said with a shrug. "I knew the odds were against us when we started this little crusade. The Dreadnoughts have destroyed so much already and even though we knew this was likely the path for us when we started on it, it's entirely different to actually see it play out in front of you. Ron was a wonderful man, far too kind for any of this crap. For him to meet that kind of end is not right. He deserved so much more than that."

I nod, though I'm not sure she sees. Before I can say anything in response, she starts again.

"I just feel like we could have done something, you know? There had to have been something we could have done." Her voice was almost pleading. "I just feel like we let him down at the worst possible time and now he's not here with us anymore. Like it's our fault he isn't here, I don't know."

"Michelle," I said with the most soothing tone I can muster, "there's absolutely nothing you could have done. He wanted information from us. Xavier gave it to him and he still killed Ron. Frankly, I don't think there's anything we could have said or done that would have changed that. Dessel wasn't going to leave Ron alive and he knew that from the start. The bastard was going to do it no matter what happened."

As I said this, she looked up to me, a tremendous amount of pain in her eyes. The look paralyzed me, rendering me unable to say or do anything helpful. I wanted to, but I had no idea how. She looked back down at the ground again as we continued forward.

"We're not going to let them get away with this," I offered. "We can't. Not after what just happened. And I can't speak for you all, but I know that I would give my life to stop those bastards anyway we can. We just have to figure out what that way is."

She nodded and I saw a little of that fire come back to her. I feel a twinge of pride and happiness, glad that I could be of some service in such a difficult time for us all.

"Xavier," I called ahead. "Where are we going, man? We've been walking for hours."

"There's a place just outside Orcapod Hills," he answered back, not stopping or turning around. "Ron had it set up as a backup in case something like this happened to our safe house. It's not exactly a short distance away, but it should be safe and there will be supplies."

The thought of warm food and cold water made me giddy. We'd been walking for hours, only the memories of the previous day on our backs. Being able to stop and rest, eat and refuel, would be welcome. It would give us a chance to come up with a plan of attack and figure out what to do next.

The sun began to set as we drew close to our destination. As we walked, I began looking for a house or some sort of structure that could possibly serve as our new hideout, but as we grew closer to the hills in the distance, there was nothing of the sort. Just empty land and shrubbery as far as the eye could see.

"I thought you said there was a place for us near the hills," I ask Xavier, a hint of annoyance in my voice. "I really don't know how much longer I can walk before we need to call it a night and set up camp."

"There is a place," he said, pointing to a small cliff facing the hills.

"What are you talking about?" I asked incredulously. "All I see are some cliffs and more hills. I don't see a single solitary spot where we can set up."

He didn't answer, continuing to lead the way.

A few moments later, it became clear: there is a large cave in the side of the cliff. I suddenly have a moment of sheer brattiness, thoroughly annoyed with the prospect of having to sleep and live in a cave like a, well, like a caveman.

"You're kidding," I said.

He shook his head in the negative as we near the entrance of the cave. It is pitch black, as I assume most caves are, uncertainty laying ahead.

"Xavier." I'm aggravated now and not even hiding it.

He continued into the opening and disappeared from our sight. As Michelle, Hulk and I come to the entrance, we see a flame in the distance. Xavier has lit a torch and has stopped to wait for us.

"You guys coming or what?" he calls out.

Michelle and I look at each other, both our faces wondering the same thing. We quickly make our entrance, trying to keep pace with our friend. Losing sight of him in this hole in the ground could get us lost and in the dark, anything can happen.

After a short walk, more light can be seen up ahead. As we draw near, we see where we'll be hiding out: a large cavern inside the cave with lit torches lining the walls all the way around. The cavern is shaped in a semi-circle and in the middle, a fire pit and supplies await. My demeanor shifts from annoyed and frustrated to surprised and happy. I didn't have a lot of faith in where we were going, but this would do just fine.

Xavier used his torch to light a fire in the pit. The light of the fire combined with the rest of the torches is enough to make it quite easy to see. When he turns around, Xavier has a big grin on his face. I wasn't sure I'd see him do that again.

"Ron had always told me about this place," he said, still grinning. I was still marveling at the size of the place as he spoke. "I didn't think I'd ever see it. Hell, I was hoping I'd never see it. Still, it's a good thing this place is here. We need to rest and regroup, act as soon as we can."

Michelle and I both nod. Hulk, tired from the long walk, had already taken his place by the fire and was fast asleep. Looking at him, Xavier continued.

"Little man's got the right idea," he said. "We need to rest up. We can't expect to accomplish our goal if we're too damn tired and hungry to act effectively."

"Our goal?" Michelle said, confused. "What goal? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Our only goal," he said strongly. "Gone or not, Ron wanted to stop the Dreadnoughts and that's exactly what we're going to do."

"But how? You saw what one of them did back there," she continued. "How are we supposed to take down all three of them? It's impossible, Xavier."

"It's not, trust me," he says confidently.

"How can you be so sure?" I chime in.

"Because," he said, a smile sneaking across his face as the light of the fire danced across his features. "I only told Dessel the area the ADM is in, but I know exactly where it is. We're going to find it before they do and use it to blow those bastards out of the water.