Before I Fall

Chapter-7

chapter-7

when I wake up the next morning it's 12 o'clock in the morning and my body feels rested and so light then it did when I was sleeping on concrete. when I sit up in the bed I hear the shower on in the other room, guessing it's Alex, I slip out of bed and when I hear the shower stop I freeze.

what do I do now? I feel so awkward because of what happened yesterday . . . what if Alex asks me to leave?

I wouldn't blame him, I wouldn't want to have to deal with a broken girl and two younger kids who are so desperate they'd do anything to get food.

No that I think of it, I'm very disgusted by myself and the way I need so much and how I trust so easily after everything that's happened.

I hate feeling so weak and like anyone can do whatever they want with me, and I'm just going with the flow. but where would I go if he told me to leave?

I don't think Alex would do that . . . but then again I barely know him . . .

while I'm caught in my trans of thought I barely notice Alex stepping out of the bathroom with black skinny jeans and dripping hair and no shirt.

his abs are toned and I look away when I notice I'm staring.

"Good morning." he says smiling at me.

I smile and turn away.

he just stares at me and I stand there awkwardly twiddling my fingers.

"Would you like a shower?" he asks, and I look at him in disbelieve. I honestly thought he would kick me out or something.

"Really?" I ask, my voice very distant.

"Yes, of course, it's the least I can do, to pay you back for dragging me to my apartment." He chuckles and his laugh makes me smile.

"Well, thank you very much, Alex." I say, smiling at the ground.

"Don't mention it. I'm going to dry my hair and make breakfast." he says, glancing at Rosie and Jake still sleeping.

" . . . Clair . . . if you need a place to stay . . . you can stay here as long as you need to, okay?" Alex says, not taking his eyes away from mine. he looks very serious and when his words sink in tears fill my eyes.

"So . . . I can stay?" I ask, I hate that I sound so weak, but . . . I hate to admit it, but I need his help.

he walks over to me, and pulls me into a hug, and I completely break down. I haven't cried in forever and it feels good to cry, but its also awkward.

I start to tremble and I cry and cry in his arms.

"Thank you so much! I don't know what I would've done if . . . thank you . . ." I sob and he holds me until my sobs turn to hiccups and my hiccups turn to small whimpers.

"Clair, I can tell you need someone to take care of you and . . . your kids." my head yanks off of his shoulder when he says this.

"They're aren't my kids." I say, and he looks confused.

"Really? . . . oh um okay . . . then who are they?" he asks.

"They're my brother and sister." I say, Alex looks like he's completely confused, but his eyes start to see what I couldn't tell him out loud, and he nods understanding.

"Oaky, well, if you need anything . . . just call for me okay? the towels are in the bathroom and so is the soap. oh and if you need cloths . . ." he looks sad when he says the rest " . . . I have some girl cloths for you." he says, and I don't push him to explain why he has girl cloths, all I do is nod and thank him.

I hug him one last time and I head to the bathroom, and jump in the shower and then brush my teeth, and I comb through my hair and pull it up in a messy bun.

Alex must have snuck in and laid the cloths on the sink, because I see black sweatpants on the sink and a PARAMORE tank top that says CRUSHCRUSHCRUSH. I smile to myself.

that's my favorite song by them.

I put on the cloths and my face goes red when I slip on the underwear he laid out for me also.

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