bulletproof in black like a funeral

sad tyjo and ryro

YO MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING FOR THE FIRST HALF OF THIS. I'LL LET YOU KNOW WHEN IT'S OVER. STAY SAFE KIDDOS.

A/N
Just to let you know I have absolutely nothin agains Jenna and Sarah I love them both. I just did this for the purpose of the story. Please keep this in mind for the rest of the story!

Tyler sighed as he rested is head against the shower wall behind him. His legs were carelessly slung over the bathtub and his body was bent in an uncomfortable manor. The tile was cold against his head, even through his hair. He looked at the blade in his hand. It was a brand new one, still wrapped in the paper thin card board it came in. He had gotten it from his Dad's shed, knowing he wouldn't miss it from the box of 100 box-cutting razors that it came from.

He pulled it out of the cardboard and looked at it. The metal was a shiny silver and it looked so sharp. He very carefully put it back into the paper slip it came out of but he still cut the paper a bit because it was so sharp.

He smirked at this and pulled it out of the packaging yet again. Tyler found it interesting that it was that sharp and he knew how easily it would slice through the skin on his thigh when the time came.

He picked up his journal next to him. It was hard-covered and wrapped in thick black leather, identical to his black book for poetry class. He pushed the blade into the paper, it easily cut through the page and the ones beneath it. Tyler picked up the charcoal pencil he used to write in the journal and circled the cut in the paper. Then proceeded to write a small note on the page about it so when he came back to it weeks later he would remember why he even did it.

He thought back to why he had even stolen it from his Dad's shed in the first place. He had gotten into a bad fight with his parents and was feeling like shit afterwards. He had written furiously into the pages of the journal, the charcoal smeared and jagged across the page, forming messy capital letters down the paper. The he stood up and held the razor he used for shaving. He usually used this to cut when he was feeling like this. However he was feeling bold. He wanted to take it up a notch. He wanted to make thin, neat lines this time, rather than the thick, messy ones the shaving razor made.

Tears slid down his cheeks. He breathed in and out again. They kept falling, eventually dampening the pages of the journal on his lap. He hated feeling like this. Like a weight was sitting on his chest holding him down and his head was buzzing with depressing thoughts. His mind shouting things at him.

Blurry loved it when he felt like this. Blurry was the one doing the shouting. Blurry was the source of the depressing thoughts.

Do it. Put the blade to your skin, unless your too scared. Are you to big of a pussy to do this Tyler? That's what everyone thinks at least. That your weak and worthless. You can't even hurt yourself  Tyler. Do it.  Blurry was relentless.

Tyler cried harder and pulled up his basketball shorts. He stared at the skin of his leg.

Do it. Do it. Do it. Drag the blade across your skin.

And Tyler really did want to do it at this point. He loved it when his blood spilled and the stinging pain it left in his thigh. He liked thinking that this is what people wanted him to do. This is what his parents wanted. They were disappointed in him and their words hurt and Tyler wanted to hurt physically too. Not just emotionally.

He put the blade to his skin, just below his hip bone and pushed it down. He thought about the fight with his parents, his friends at school, his girlfriend, Jenna. He hated the way his life was at the moment. He was stuck in a group of friends he didn't like, stuck with a girlfriend he wasn't even interested in, he was only dating her because it made sense (he was the basketball captain and she was cheerleading captain).

He dragged the blade to the right and winced in pain. He picked it up and did it again, creating another thin line blow the former. He inhaled sharply at the pain, but he wasn't gonna lie he liked it. He felt he deserved it.

He did it a few more times before carelessly tossing it next to him in the bathtub. He watched the blood bead up and slowly drip down the inside of his leg.

He eventually stood up and got out the band aids and things he used to clean out his cuts. He was so familiar with this. He spent far too many nights like this. Locked away in the bathroom attached to his bedroom after a fight with his parents. Sometimes after a rough day at school and basketball practice and more often than not, after Blurry was nagging him all day.

When Tyler's leg was wrapped neatly in bandages he crawled into bed and fell into a dreamless sleep.
Aight you can read now.
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They all sat quietly in the band room eating their lunches. Tyler was sitting next to Josh on the piano bench. Tyler looked at Ryan across the room by himself. He  was sitting on the ground with his knees pulled up into his chest, he looked pretty unhappy.

"Where is Brendon?" Tyler asked no one in particular. Ryan scoffed and shook his head but didn't answer his question. He looked over at Josh, hoping he hadn't asked the wrong question. He still didn't feel super comfortable around Josh and his friends. He had hung out with them a few more times while Josh and him worked on the project and also sat with them during lunch occasionally. However, He was still scared of saying the wrong thing.

"What?" Josh said when he looked over at Tyler. "Oh, twice a week Brendon sits with his girlfriend Sarah at lunch"

"T-then why is Ryan seem so mad?" Tyler asked hesitantly.

"Because he's jealous of Brendon and Sarah. Brendon is in love with Ryan but doesn't want anyone to know so he's dating Sarah to cover up that he's bisexual. Even though Ryan doesn't show it, he's in love with Brendon" Josh explained in between bits of his sandwich. "It's confusing, I just feel bad for Ryan"

"Oh" was all Tyler could think to say. He felt bad for Ryan too but also Brendon because he knows what it's like to get caught up with the popular kids.

The bell rang and they all got up to leave. "See you at my place tonight to work on our project?" Josh asked before he turned to leave.

"Yeah, see you then" Tyler said, his mood suddenly dampened by Ryan and Brendon's story. It reminded him far too much of himself.

A/N

Pls pls comment and vote. There's like 2 people reading this and I kind of want tony at discontinue it if that keeps up. Love you guys <3