cody herbinko ; imagines

he cheats pt. 2

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it had been a week without cody. a week filled with tears, a week of no sleep, and a week and counting of a torn heart. your limbs were weak and your structure weaker. skipping meals and laying in bed was something you found yourself becoming familiar with.

the moment you stepped out of cody's house, you completely broke down in your car. your first clenched tightly to the steering wheel and your eyes closed tight, begging for the tears to stop. but it hadn't been that easy, you were utterly shattered. cody had been everything to you. the reason you looked forward to another day, the reason you had to remember to breath, the reason you were so anxious to sleep so you could see another day of cody.

you were so enveloped with the thought of him, loving every aspect of his being. he was without a doubt, your world. your love was so much more than infinite and flew miles past the moon. and when you watched him throw that away, you couldn't help but think he knew exactly what he was doing. he knew the extents of what he did would hurt you, and because of this, you we're even more crushed. he was the reason you wanted to cower away, but he was also the reason you wanted to get out of bed and stop allowing yourself to think of everything you had.

however, it wasn't easy. it hurt so much, and your heart was suffering from dagger wounds that would leave massive scars.

so there you were, laying under the shadow of a blanket while the light from the window was trying to fight its way through the openings of the blankets. your hair was a mess and your chest was tight. not a call from cody had sounded throughout the week, making it clear that he'd decided you we're a want, and not a need.

you clenched your hands into fists, groping the blankets between your fingers. you wanted the pain to stop, you wanted to feel how to breath again. but without cody, there was no air, only agony and heartbreak.

after sulking in bed for over an hour, you managed to lift yourself from the under sheets feeling the familar pressure in ur lower abdomen. you groaned, knowing exactly what time of the month it was. you heavily sighed, knowing you needed to head to the store in order to keep yourself clean. and so with all the motivation your cramps we're giving you, you mustered enough energy to lift your body from the bed completely, placing your bare feet on the carpet.

taking slow strides to the bathroom, you did your monthly routine and finally showered after a few days of laying in bed. you couldn't deny that you'd felt refreshed, on the outside that was. and once you were finished, you dressed in pair of leggings and an oversized sweatshirt that happened to be cody's. he'd left it the night he first stayed over with you, whispering how much he loved you and how he was telling you to never let him go. moments like that had seemed alike to a dream, a mere fantasy.

you felt pathetic, walking around in your cheating ex-boyfriend's clothes. but you couldn't help it, you missed him. and this was the only thing you knew you had left of him, which is why you hadn't thought twice about putting it on. reminding you of every sweet moment you had with him, reminding you how real everything felt.

but it also reminded you how much of it may have been only you. only you that was so deeply in love, believing cody felt the same. but when reality hit you, it was such an enormous wake up call. you were so blinded by the thought of cody loving you that you hadn't noticed him slowly falling away, creating so much space between the two of you. your heart applied even more pressure to your chest at the thoughts swarming in your mind.

you sat in your car, your hair a mess, your eyes puffy from crying constantly. you were exhausted, more mentally than physically.

once you pulled into the parking lot, you made your way out of the car and into the small store. you wandered around, looking for your monthly materials and medication for the cramps. after collecting your items, you stalked to the junk aisles looking for fattening foods you'd be able to stuff your face with while attempting to erase cody from your thoughts.