Radicle (Terminal trilogy #2, can stand alone)

Goddess of lilies

 I returned from the bath with fresh skin and a renewed sense of camaraderie, which I assumed meant Michael's plan had gone through. He still didn't let me leave, but that would be next.

I slept on the floor, as I usually did, and had another round of regrettable and forgettable nightmares before daybreak. I was sitting upright before any of the Brothers arose, and after a long couple of impatient moments, I knocked on Michael's door.

"Permission to leave?"

"No." Was his groggy answer.

"Please, sir, I am restless."

"You never used to call me sir. What's up with that?"

"I want to fight the demons. I haven't for so long. Let me out on the battleground."

"Absolutely not. I do not know if you're pure yet."

"I have always been pure. Please. Test me."

"I don't do tests." He said, muffled by the door, but I could almost hear him plot. By the end of the day, he'd finally know I was the most loyal angel he had. No need for doubt from either of us.

He let me walk outside, almost freely, by the time the sun was up. But he was following me. It was wholly unusual of him to be out anywhere, and highly distracting for the angels who were trying to get their work done. Especially for the angels of the outer ring- he barely visited them, and now he was following me through their lands.

No one dared to speak to me with Michael at my heel, so I had to walk up to some of my old friends. Naon, Zedrael, Camoth- still alive, well. Kiel, Parabel, Tul, Barth, Aedeniel, Biala- dead. I made note to think of them in my night's prayers.

"Who are you closest to? Dohniel? Or one of them?"

I watched his eyes anticipate my answer. "My closest friends are either dead or felled."

"That must have bumped someone up to fill the gap, yeah?"

"Naon then."

"Naon? Hm. Naon? You have any other close friends?"

In all my delight of being with Michael, I still hadn't managed to completely null my mind from all critical thinking. And Michael probably knew that- it had been him who had invited Dohn, after all. He knew Naon wasn't my closest friend- he was an apprentice of the electrician Henzil. Too valuable to get involved with anything.

"Fielm, then." I barely knew Fielm.

"He's dead."

"Oh. Uh, Lakoi?"

"Lakoi? Alright. Nice to know."

I had a feeling Lakoi wasn't going to be... well, I wasn't sure yet. But it wasn't a good feeling to have, especially for an angel.

"Have you reconsidered letting me fight?" I said.

"No." He seemed to admit it truthfully, like he honestly hadn't put it into thought since I had mentioned the idea in the morning. "Look, Nichael, I realize you want to get out there. But you've only just returned from Hell, yeah? You're not ready. You told me yourself: you've heard things that have swayed your mind. I worry the battlefields will slow your healing."

"I'm..." I didn't really know what to say to him, mostly because I was suddenly acutely aware of how casual I was being towards him. And how casual he was towards me. Then again, Michael seemed to treat everyone with the same level of disconnected respect. It was probably good he didn't speak to too many of his angels, or else they'd grow worried.