Trigger Warning: This story contains sexual/emotional abuse, violence, and self-harm. This may be difficult for some readers. Please engage in self-care as you read this story.
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"Run, Danzelle...Just leave me." She whispered under her breath while lying on a cold, hard ground. She's been shot twice while we're running away from the club. At ngayon, nasa tabi niya ko, pilit ko siyang tinatayo. And I'm so aware that blood's on my hands now.
"No! Hindi pwede! Get up! Marlee! Ano ba?" I cried. We can't waste any minute just arguing. We need to escape. We planned this for almost one month, and I don't want this to screw up.
"Just... leave me. H-hindi ko na kaya... K-kapag sinama mo pa ko...maabutan nila tayo. Just leave okay? Save yourself." she managed to say despite the pain that she's feeling. Her hands are on her stomach, where she's been shot.
"Damn it Marlee! Hindi pwede! Magkasama tayo dito!" Tears keep falling down on my face. "I can't just leave you here! Get up!" Pilit ko siyang tinatayo pero nagpapabigat siya.
"No. If you don't run now, you'll die. Just go!"
And that's when I heard footsteps. They're here.
"Tara na Marlee! Dali!" It takes everything in me just to carry her up.
"No! Just leave me." She keeps on jerking away pero nilalabanan ko siya. Inalalayan ko siya para makalakad kami. "Danzelle! Just leave me!"
Hindi ko siya pinapakinggan. We just keep on walking despite the fact that they're near and they can kill us anytime they catch our shadow.
And that's when I heard gunshots. Both Marlee and I stumbled. Suddenly, my left arm hurts like hell. Then I turn to Marlee. Her eyes wide, her body's full of blood. No...
"Run." She said, and that's what I did.
I can't help to cry out loud when I finally woke up from my worst nightmare. Magkahalo yung luha at pawis sa mukha ko. I hug my knees and cried. Even though she's dead for almost half a year now, my memories of her whole body soaking in blood is still fresh in my head.
Marlee, I'm sorry. I didn't save you.
I watched her die. Just the same scene when my parents got killed. And all I did is to run. I didn't even turn back to ask some help. I'm so stupid.
It's been always like this every time I wake up crying. I can't help to stop from reminiscing. Umuulit-ulit yung lahat-lahat ng nangyari sa utak ko.
When they killed my parents, they let me live.
Dinala nila ko sa isang malayong lugar. Hindi ko alam kung saan yun. Basta nung pagpasok sa loob, maraming babae. The age brocket is 16 to 25. Nakabihis sila. At ganun din yung ginawa nila sakin. Binihisan nila ko ng maikling damit at pinapila.
Nakatayo lang kaming naghihintay. Takot na takot ako nun. But someone held my hand. She said her name's Marlee. Tapos nun, nagsipasukan na yung mga babae sa mga pinto. Kaming dalawa ni Marlee yung naiwan.
May biglang humila sakin papasok sa isang kwarto. A dirty old man. He starts to undress me. And play with my body. He even hurt me. At hindi natigil 'yun. Inulit-ulit pa niya.
Halos naging isang buwan na nung nalaman ko na hawak kami ng isang sindikato. Marlee became my friend. Siya yung naging Ate ko sa loob ng club na 'yun. Minsan, siya yung sumasalo sa mga lalaking gusto akong galawin. After a month, nagplano akong tumakas, pero pinigilan ako ni Marlee. Paulit-ulit ko siyang kinumbinsi na tumakas hanggang sa pumayag siya.
Nung malapit na kami makatakas, she died. I ran. And I keep on blaming myself why I left her.
Everything was my fault. I deserve to die, not her.
"Hey, you okay?" Lumapit siya sakin. He lifted his hand to wipe my tears, and gave me an apologetic smile. "Don't worry. You're safe now." He was the one who took care of me when he saw me lying on the ground near the park. He kept me for almost half a year now, and I still can't talk to him. Kahit na sobrang daldal niya, at mukha naman siyang mabait, still I should trust no one.
He bent over to kiss my forehead that startled me a lot. "I've been taking care of you since...what? 5? 6 months? Pero hindi ka pa din nagsasalita." He reached for my hand, "Hey, you can trust me. I'm a friend."
BINABASA MO ANG
Haunted Past
RomansaAfter escaping from the hands of brutal syndicates, Danzelle has to fight all the demons and traumas taunting her in order to survive. Can she do that by the help of her dashing rescuers? (FILIPINO-ENGLISH)