Summer Love [Harry Styles Fanfiction]

Chapter 12

Harry's POV

I don't know where I was running to, but that didn't stop me. I had to get away- away from everything. I'm such a screw up. I don't deserve to be on this Earth, and I know everyone feels that way. I highly doubt any of the guys actually like me. If my best mate would kiss the girl I like, then obviously none of them are trust worthy. I just want to die. I hate myself, and no one will ever forgive me for what I've done. 

"Harry?" 

I knew who it was, but I didn't care. I know what I'm going to do now. It's taken me this long to figure it out, but I now know what I was meant to do. I'm going to kill myself. 

"Harry! What are you doing?!" She was running towards me now, but it was too late. I closed my eyes, and started to count to three. 1.... 2.... 

"HARRY! HARRY, WAKE UP!" 

"Cassie?" I looked down at the ground and realized I was now stading outside- not only was I standing outside, I was standing on a dock that led to the lake. 

"Oh my god, Harry! You're awake!" Cassie hugged me, and started to run her fingers through my mess of curls. It took me a while to react, but I wrapped my arms around Cassie's waist and started to cry. My dream seemed so real, and it turned out to be. I've always been known to talk in my sleep, but I would never seriously try to do something like kil myself. Not until now. 

"Cassie, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have kissed her, I don't know what got into me. I just- I got so upset. I wanted you to know how I felt and I will never forg-" I didn't get to finish my sentence because Cassie's index finger was placed on my lips. 

"Stop talking," she giggled. "I don't like Louis, we're just friends. I have no idea what even happened! I was just putting his laptop away, and when I went to turn around his lips were on mine. I went to pull away, but you walked in right then. I like you, Harry." Cassie took her finger off my lips, and looked at the ground. 

"Y-you like me?" I was shocked. I mean, yeah we really hit it off, but she never admitted it to my face that she liked me. I threw my hands up in the air, "thank you, God!"

"You're such a dork." Cassie shook her head laughing, but her facial expressions soon went serious. "I like you a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm not mad at you. You basically snogged Tori right in front of me. Do I have to remind you that she's my best friend, and she likes Liam?" 

"She likes Liam?" Wow, I'm such an idiot. 

"Yes, she does. That doesn't matter anymore, though. She feels like her chance with him is ruined now. Sure, he's dating Danielle, but they aren't doing well. I'm extremely worried about Louis- he thinks you hate him, Harry. Niall and Zayn are totally confused, and here I am." Cassie was yelling at this point. "Here I am, saving you. What were you thinking?! I know you're upset, but we all still care about you! I am so extremeley hurt and confused. Why would you leave your friends over something so stupid and careless- why would you leave me?" Cassie was crying, and I wanted to comfort her more than anything. I just didn't know what to do. How could I be so stupid? 

"Cassie, I'm sorry." I tried to hug her, but she pushed me away. Her feelings for me clearly don't matter right now- I don't blame her. 

"Whatever, Harry. I'm going back to bed. I suggest you do the same, AFTER you apologize to everyone. Understand?" Cassie can be really demanding when she wants to be.

"Yes, I understand." 

"Good, now let's go." Cassie motioned for me to follow her, and we quickly walked up the hill back to the lake house. Thank god, it didn't take that long. Our walk was quiet the entire time, but I understand. I hurt her. 

"Harry, you're back!" Niall wrapped his arms around my shoulders giving me one of his famous Horan hugs. I watched as Cassie walked down the hallway to her room. Great.

"Yeah, I'm back." I hugged Niall, and he let go of me so I could breathe. I took a seat on the stool that was in the kitchen- Zayn and Niall followed me. 

"Listen, you guys. I'm really sorry about all the trouble I've caused. I don't know what's gotten into me! I saw Louis kissing Cassie, and I just got so angry. I shouldn't have kissed Tori. It was wrong, and I will never forgive myself for it. I have no idea why I was outside standing on that dock- I thought I was dreaming!" I pinched the bridge of my nose and Zayn's arm soon wrapped around my shoulders. 

"Aw, don't worry about it, mate. You're still my favorite." Zayn gave me a quick smile. 

"Yeah, man. We're cool!" Niall smiled, too before realizing what Zayn had just said. "Hey! I thought I was your favorite!" Niall crossed his arms over his chest and pretended to pout. 

"Nialler, you'll always be my favorite Irish leprachaun. Harry's just my favorite curly haired- weirdo." Zayn winked, and I punched him in the arm. "I deserved that!" 

"Yeah, ya did! Thanks though, guys. It means a lot!" I gave Niall a quick pat on the back before I walked out of the room. That went better than I expected, but that's probably because they aren't even involved in this. I took a deep breathe before knocking on the door that led to the person's room that I dreaded talking to most right now- Louis. 

"H- Harry?" Louis sniffed, and clutched the blanket he was holding in his arms closer to his chest. Even though I was incredibly mad at him right now, I couldn't stand to seem him like this. I pulled him into my arms, and started to run my fingers through his messed up hair. (A/N: D'aww. Larry!) 

"Shhh, Lou. Don't cry, it's okay." I whispered, as I continued to run my fingers through his hair. 

"You mean y-you forgive me?" Louis rubbed his eyes as he pulled out from my embrace. 

"I can't hold a grudge agaisnt you forever, Boo Bear." Louis smiled as he heard me say his nick name. "I'm still upset, though. Why did you kiss her?" 

"I don't know, Haz. She went to put my laptop away and when I went to help her she turned around to say something, and my lips crashed into hers. It was an honest mistake! When I realized what was going on, I put my hand on her cheek because I was going to pull away- I didn't want to be a jerk about it. And right when I went to pull away, you walked in. That's when all the drama started." Louis looked like he truly felt bad, and I appreciated that. I feel extremely stupid now, though. I wish I wouldn't always jump to stupid conclusions- I should have known better than to think that my best mate would kiss the girl I like, but no, I had to go and screw everything up.

"Geeze, Lou. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. I'm sorry I lashed out at you, I didn't mean it. I hope you can forgive me." I looked at Louis with my best puppy dog eyes before we both started cracking up laughing. 

"Like you said, Haz- I can't hold a grudge against you forever." Louis gave me a smile, before I hugged him again quickly. 

"Thanks, Louis. I'm going to go talk to Tori now." I rolled my eyes, and Louis gave me a thumbs up before I walked out the door. I heard him yell a quick good-luck, and I sighed. Thanks, Louis. 

I'm going to need it.