(I wrote this at 3 am, so if you can't see a point or plot line to this story it's because there isn't one. It's just a stupid short story i wrote after seeing Star Wars for the umptenth time and looking at icanhasacheezburger.com while being sleep deprived and bored. Enjoy!)
Jedi has a cheezburger
I entered this hostile world looking for one thing-
The cheezburger.
Their fame had spread from galaxy to galaxy and now after twenty billion years later I would finally have-
the cheezburger.
I had been frozen in order to taste their sweet delicious burgery flesh and it was well worth the wait.
As I looked around this hostile planet waiting for someone to serve me a tank, the inhabits form of transportation, race to the hospital across the street. I started wondering how something so wonderful came from such an evil place.
The restaurant was packed and the and the place reeked of cheezburgers. My mouth salivated at the smell. A waiter, gangly weak looking thing, walked up to me. He was an evil looking man, and slight like he had never tasted-
the cheezburger.
"We don't serve your kind here." he said smoothly evenly glaring at me with purple irises.
"I'll be careful."
"You'll be starving! You're all the same coming from all over to haz cheezburger but what about us? What of the people who live here and will be here after you leave? WHAT OF OUR CHEEZBURGER!?" I was stunned the message sunk into my deepest core as I realized for the first time in my life that...I wasn't getting a cheezburger.
"Listen here you give me a cheezburger OR SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES!" I pulled out my light saber and threatened his life. He looked at my sword then at me and shrugged.
"Oh, all right I guess then, if you're going to be like that."
AND I sat down and ate my soggy cheezburger looking out to yet another tank going to the hospital going in the out entrance.
"What a terrible place," I said. My cheezburger gave me diarrhea. As i lay dying on the ground, the wiater walked over and whispered into my ear.
"Cheezburger iz peoplez."
YOU ARE READING
Short Stories
HumorA collection of my short stories and plays that may or may not have anything to do with each other. ENJOY!
