I'm fine

Explaining

Amanda's POV:

Its been 3 months since Nate has started beating me, ever since the one night I tried to come home early, but it usually didn't help.

I went home for the night, I've been scared to walk into my own apartment, he was waiting there for me, a belt in his hands "welcome home my pretty" he smiled

He pulled my hair and threw my onto the bed, he ripped off my clothes and viciously forced himself inside of me making his way in and out while beating me. After that he started whipping me, he took a beer bottle and threw it at my back, I screamed.

"NATE STOP THIS PLEASE"

He threw me against the wall, he started kicking my stomach, while hitting me with his belt, then he stood me up shoved himself inside of me again, threw me back down and left.

"You tell anyone your dead" he said I curled up into a ball and cried myself to sleep

I walked into work the next morning, I tried to show up early for no one would say anything, Nick of course was already there.

"Amanda how are you feeling today?" He asked

I looked up at him, I could feel like I was about to cry "do you wanna talk about it?" He asked

I couldn't stand it anymore and I nodded, we walked into the bunks "can you tell me what happened?" He asked

I started to burst out and cry, he pulled me into a hug and I cried on his chest, I kept it in my body for too long and I just had to tell someone.

"Shh, manda its ok" he stroked my hair

We sat down on one of the beds, he lifted my chin up "please Amanda tell me what happened"

I sighed "it sta-started 3 months ago"

"What did?"

I gulped "Nate beating me"

"Nates been beating you?" He asked worried

I nodded "why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I-I couldn't, I'm a detective for the special victims unit for gosh sake, I work with victims like this everyday, I didn't want to think that I was one"

"It's ok, is that all he did?"

I shook my head "he's been raping me too"

He stood up and punched the wall, I could tell he was mad, another tear came down my face "I'm sorry Nick, I should have told someone it's all my fault" I cried

He came to me and hugged me again "it's not your fault ok? Your staying at my place tonight"

"I-I can't, he'll be mad and he will beat me worse"

"Please Amanda, just for tonight I can't let you live like this"

"fine" I looked down

He picked up my chin, I looked into his brown eyes, he leaned in and kissed my lips passionately, I kissed back I felt fireworks light up all around us. It was amazing.

He pulled away "I'm sorry" I kissed him again "it's ok, that was a great kiss" i giggled

He made me feel 10 times better, he hugged me again "but Nick please don't tell anyone ok? You're the only person who knows, he said he would kill me if anyone found out

He nodded and we walked into the squad room. "You too ok?" Fin asked

"Yah were fine" Nick smiled walking back to his desk

The rest of the day went by pretty slow, I was nervous I kept thinking what was going to happen once Nate found out I wasn't home.

Nicks POV:

"I'll be right back guys" I said grabbing my coat

"Where are you going?" Amanda asked

"I just need an hour" I nodded walking out

I got to the apartment and knocked on the door "who are you?" He asked

I punched him in the face, then in the stomach "stay away from Rollins, Nate" i screamed

"Oo she told she's a bad girl, she won't see the end of it"

"You threatening a police officer?" I asked He laughed and slammed the door.

I got back to the precinct and the rest of the day went by pretty slow, soon enough it was time to go, Amanda and I were the last ones to leave.

"You ready to go?" I asked

She nodded "yah"

"You hungry?"

She laughed "kinda"

"Ok let's get something to eat" I smiled

We went to a bar, we got a few drinks and ate some food, Amanda talked about what happened, I tried to cheer her up, I could tell she was worried.

We got back to my apartment, Amanda went to get a drink when I saw the cuts on her wrists. I ran up to her and grabbed her hands, pulling up her sleeves. My heart shattered.

"Amanda did you cut yourself?" I looked into her eyes and saw she was about to cry

She looked down at her wrists "I-I just couldn't take it anymore, I was in a dark part of time and I was upset that Nate could do this."

I pulled her into a hug, and kissed the top of her head "it's ok, but you gotta promise me you won't do this again ok?"

She nodded, and I pressed my lips against hers, I'm glad she's with me in my arms, I have always dreamed of this and now it's finally true.

"I'm really tired Nick" she said

"You can take my bed, I'll go on the couch" I smiled grabbing a blanket

"Um can you stay with me?" She asked nervously

"Of course" I smiled

She climbed into the bed, I wrapped my arm around her body pulling her close to me, she instantly fell asleep, and soon enough I did too.