Fight Back

Chapter 29 : I Don't Deserve Her

~Alpha Jacob Anderson~

I don't deserve her.

I hurt her by saying the words that no mate wants to hear. I rejected her and for that I will be forever haunted with the knowledge I did so. I hurt my mate and even the thought of it makes me want to hurt myself. I am so disgusted with myself that I did that to her.

I should let her go, so she can have someone that is worthy of her, but I am choosing to be selfish.

I want her.

Every fiber of my being wants her, and I will move heaven and earth to show her that. I will be entirely and utterly selfish when it comes to her because she is MINE. She deserve the world and I will give it to her at her feet.

I need her.

There wasn't a day since I met her that her beautiful face hasn't entire my mind. When she was gone it felt like a part of me was lost in complete darkness. She is my one and only light, and I curse myself for not finding her soon enough. If she was gone then my soul would have left with her.

I love her.

I love the girl that is peacefully sleeping in my bed. She is beautiful with her hair spread out on her pillow, and drool coming out her mouth. It pained me leaving her alone in my bed, but I had to talk to Lilly about what we should do today to celebrate her birthday. Lilly already had everything set and gave me the run through, but I have a few surprises for her on my own.

I careful snuck back into my room seeing my sleeping mate. I made her a special birthday breakfast consist of confetti pancakes with rainbow sprinkles and a single candle along with a glass of orange juice. I set the tray of food on the foot of the bed to wake up MY sleeping beauty.

I gently shake her shoulder she is snuggling up to the pillow I was sleeping on, and the gesture makes me smile and makes me wish I was that pillow. "Wake up Birthday Girl."

She blinks her beautiful brown eyes open to adjust to the light, then exhales a big yawn till she fully awake. "Good Morning."

"Good Morning, love I made you a special birthday breakfast to start your day." I smile while setting the tray of food on her lap.

"Thank you Jacob, but you didn't have to do this." She tells me but I hear her stomach growling in hunger.

"I am happy to do this plus you are going to need some energy for what's planned today." I give her a small hint to let her know what is planned on her special day.

"What is planned today?" She asks curiously while digging into her pancakes.

I cannot bare looking at her when she puts the food in her mouth. Her lips are to tempting for me and I don't know if I'll be able to stop myself if I start to kiss her.

"How did you sleep?" I ask her to change the subject and to check on her because the pack doctor said that she should be drowsy for the next few days.

"I slept fine actually, surprisingly." She adds the last part quietly and I remain from asking more. I won't pressure her to tell me anything, whenever she needs me I'll be here.

"We have a big day planned so get dressed, birthday girl." I quickly hit her leg above the covers and walk out the door to give her privacy.

******

Maria is in the passenger seat of my black Lamborghini cause I remember her admiring it when I stole her away when her and Lilly went clubbing. I hope she likes her surprise and this day is perfect for her because she deserve nothing less. We don't struggle to make conversation cause we don't find a need to I am perfectly happy with her being this close to me.