Marriage mistakes

Hiding

I pull on my white sundress that flows in just a way to hide my ever growing baby bump, still unable to confess to Stephen about the precious baby I am carrying scared of how he will react especially how he could make my life at work miserable. It's been 4 months since I met Stephan and I'm still unsure of my feelings towards him. He is everything I ever looked for but for all I know I'm still legally married and the small minor fact of the pregnancy so he properly wouldn't want me anyway.

In the past months I have grown closer to him and we spend all our free time together which is difficult with us working completely different shifts but when we are apart our phones are constantly vibrating alerting us to the others presence.

I had made up my mind no matter what happens today I have to tell him. He has to know before this (whatever this is) goes any further.

I slipped on my cream ballet pumps and made my way down to the reception area. It was like a movie the way that we descended the staircase at the same time from opposite sides but both watching each other intently until we meet in the centre and he took my left hand in his and bowed his head to kiss it gently while whispering "my lady". He kept hold of my hand and led me out of the hotel and down towards the local park cafe to sit in the sunshine.
As I sat there waiting for him to get our drinks I thought of all the ways I could tell him but is there ever really a best way to tell someone your technically married and with child? I don't think so. How do you tell him the reason you've had days separate each month are not because your volunteering but is really local check ups at the Drs. As I watched him make his way back to our table, with a latte for him and peppermint tea for me, I watched a smile grow across his face making him look incredible handsome.
How am I going to be able to resist him?

As the hours passed I was no closer to revealing to Stephan the truth and as he went up to get the 3rd round of coffees I vowed as soon as he came back I would tell him. But as he sat down I lost the nerve and quickly ran to the toilet and had a stern talk in the mirror with myself. After I relieved myself I made my way back to the toilet my hands shaking. This could be it. The next 10 minutes could be all i have left with him. As I took my seat Stephan looked over at me concerned and asked if I was ok. This was it my moment. I opened my mouth and a splutter came out. I cleaned my throat and tried again. "Imstilltechnicallymarried,myhusbandwasabusive,Ilostmyfirstbabyandimpregnantagainbutiranawayandhehasnoideawhereiamorthatimpregant" I blurt out at considerable speed knowing that it was highly unlikely that he managed to grasp any of that.
"Ok Rosie calm down take a deep break and try again. What's the matter?"
"Ok well please don't hate me, I just didn't know what to do or how to tell you"
He takes my hand gently in his and promised me everything will be ok. So I start my story at the beginning with the marriage and everything that happened afterwards hoping that he will understand and that i won't loose him.