The Hearts Ache

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Piyali comforted the sobbing girl and walked her to her hostel. Then she stepped out of the campus. She needed some time by herself. To come to terms with all she had heard. A mud path to the west of the campus led through a thick forest into a clearing. It was a secluded place. Piyali liked coming here whenever she wanted to clear her head, or to even to just spend some quiet, contemplative time. She sat by a rock there and closed her eyes.

Things had turned upside down in Mukundo's life. He had stopped performing. That had led to quarrels with his wife, who had since left home. He still had students, but except for the practice time with them, he kept to himself, drinking and listening to records. Her home was broken, her father was withdrawn. It was too much for a young Sumedha to handle. She didn't do well in her board exams. After that her grandmother decided that hostel would be better for her. "She would have more cheerful company of her friends," she had said. Mukundo had been devastated, but he hadn't objected. "I'm sorry. But your Thakuma is right. Study well," he had told her when she was leaving for the hostel.

Sumedha didn't know what had prompted all this. But Piyali did. How could you be so self-destructive, Mukundo Babu? She cried for a long time.

--

"Ask him to come here, Sumedha. Even if he doesn't agree to perform, tell him to come and watch you perform."

"He hadn't agreed to come to drop me. He said he won't be able to leave me behind."

"He will come for the performance. Try it. Seeing him would make you happy, won't it?"

"Shall I tell him about you?"

"No. Let that be a surprise." Piyali had no way of knowing if her presence will draw him out or deter him further from coming. She didn't want to take a risk.

"Miss," Sumedha came back excitedly after making the call, "He is coming!"

Piyali couldn't have jumped in excitement like Sumedha, but her heart did that for her.

--

Piyali had checked on Sumedha. She was busy with her friends in the preparation for evening's programme. Other teachers were helping with preparation of costumes and stage. Piyali figured that she could take a break before the final round of stage practice for musical. She walked to the guesthouse where Mukundo was staying and stood before his door. When she lifted her hand to press the door-bell, she found it trembling. But she made herself go ahead.

Mukundo opened the door expecting it to be Sumedha and was startled to find someone else. Wordlessly, he took her appearance in. She had changed. At twenty-five she looked a mature woman, very different from to the twenty-year-old skinny girl he remembered. Age and a more prosperous lifestyle, where she didn't have to eat stale food for three of her four meals, and work continuously from four in the morning to ten at night, had filled her up just right. The warm clothes cold Darjeeling weather demanded made her look even fuller.

At long last when it stopped feeling like a dream, and her standing within inches of him dawned on him as real, he was so overwhelmed with longing that his face contorted. "Piyali!" he barely managed a whisper as a lump formed in his throat. Against his better judgement, he threw his arms around her and hugged her tight right there, at the door. She didn't resist. The corridor was empty and no one was around.

"Oh my God," he said as he released her, "I don't know what am I doing. Will you... come in... Of course... Please come in..." He let her in and locked the door behind them. "Let me see you to my heart's content," he held her at arm's distance, "You look well, Piyali."

"But you don't," he was clean-shaven and well-groomed as usual. But years of neglect and depression was showing. He looked weak. His cheeks had grown hollow and there were dark circles around his eyes.

"I am just getting older," he evaded.

"Older!" she snorted.

"Are you the music teacher, then?" he pressed on his curiosity, "Was it your idea?"

"Yes."

"The thought had occurred to me once. Darjeeling. Residential school. But I didn't think you would be teaching music."

"I am the Maths teacher. Filling up for the music teacher, because we have none right now."

"Hmm..."

"Why did you stop performing, Mukundo Babu?"

His face darkened.

"So much happened, and you didn't think it right to talk to me at least once? One letter? I had left you my address. You probably never even looked at it."

Mukundo stayed silent. He wasn't prepared for this meeting. He didn't know where to start.

Piyali sighed and made to leave.

"You are going?" he asked miserably.

"I have to go right now. Mukundo Babu. I am planning to perform tonight. I will be on stage for the first time. I am nervous, obviously. If you come with me, it will make me very happy. This is a charity show; so do not expect to earn your usual remuneration. But I am still asking."    


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