Life Is What You Make It (A Tom Hiddleston Fanfic)

Part 27: Crawling Out of the Muck

Wallowing In It

It's good that I don't have filming for two days. It's really good because I don't leave my bed, and I don't think I could even if I wanted to.

Anna comes by to check on me not too long after Tom's call, and she finds me in a puddle on my bed. I explain the conversation, if you can call it that, with Tom. Anna just listens, with a periodic 'Ohhh', 'Damn', or 'Oh damn' thrown in. "Mia, you've got to call him back!" Anna exclaims at the end.

"No."

"No? What do you mean, no?"

"I mean that Tom wouldn't give me a chance to explain. He obviously didn't want to hear me out. Maybe this Evans thing just gave Tom the excuse he needed to break it off with me," I say more calmly than I probably should.

"No, no, no!" Anna says, almost stomping like a child. "It can't end like this, Mia. You love him! I know it; it's written all over your face every time you're together."

"It's no good, Anna. Not if he doesn't love me."

Anna is silent, and she walks to the bed to hug me. "What do you need from me?" "Just your friendship. And some time to get out from under this. If you could run interference for me until...until I'm myself again, that'd be great," I say.

"Sure." With this, Anna says she'll check on me later, and she leaves my apartment.

The Semblance

By Monday when I'm expected on set again, I'd like to stay in bed. But I don't. I know the sooner I get back to some semblance of my life, the better.

I walk outside to get into the car that's been sent for me. "Miss MacKenzie?"

"Yes."

The woman who addressed me continues quickly, introducing herself as Rachel Something from the news site on which the story about Evans and me appeared.

"Do you care to comment on your relationship with Chris Evans?" Rachel Something asks. "There is no relationship in the way you mean. We're just friends," I reply.

"That's not how it appeared on Friday night," she says with a smirk on her face.

I know she's baiting me, so I give her an icy stare. She backs away from me just a bit. "Again, there's no relationship. Get your facts straight," I say as I get into the car.

The drive to the set is short, and I walk directly to the entrance when I get out. There are a few people milling about, and one may have called my name but I pay no attention. All I want is to get inside to safety.

"Hey, Mia, didn't you hear me calling you?" says someone behind me as the door closes. I turn with a start, and I see Ben Foster standing behind me. "Shit, Ben, you scared the crap out of me." "Sorry about that. Didn't know you were so jumpy." "Me either," I mutter under my breath.

"Let's talk for a bit," Ben says, pointing to a quiet area in the corner of the room. After a few steps, Ben turns to me. I can see he's contemplating what he's about to say. "You know, Mia, we're doing pretty well schedule-wise. If you think you need a day or two, you know, to take time...time for yourself, I think we can spare it," Ben says, not quite meeting my gaze.

"If it's all the same to you, Ben, I'd just like to get back to work," I say, mustering all of my willpower. Ben looks at me for a moment, then he says simply, "Okay."

I head for makeup and wardrobe to begin my preparations for the day.

Moving... But Is It Forward?

Filming goes as planned for the next week. I wish I could say the same thing about my life.

Each morning and evening or night when I leave and return to my apartment, there are a few paparazzi, some just asking 'How are you, Miss MacKenzie.' Others ask the most outrageous questions, including some I won't repeat.

Anna does her best to run interference for me. She's gone to the market for me so that it's one less time I have to be out of the safe zones of either set or apartment.

Besides the paps, there's also been a fair number of fans, both Tom's and mine. Some of Tom's seem angry at his alleged mistreatment by me; mine seem generally supportive of me, though I can see disappointment in some expressions. The opposing group of fans stand on the opposite side of the street, like there's about to be gang warfare. Sometimes, some of the more moderate fans get together as if to discuss a truce. I say nothing to either group, going with the advice of both Ben and my manager, Mitch. Their opinion is this will all blow over if I ignore it long enough.

The trouble is, I don't want to simply ignore it. I want to shout my innocence from the rooftops. I want to hunt down Simone What's-her-name and introduce her to Rachel Something. Most of all, I want to call Tom and pour my heart out to him and have him listen and understand. Well, we don't always get what we want.

It's during an interlude in my dark apartment as I'm contemplating my new reality when my phone rings. I look at the number and see it might be my saving grace: Dean Kowolski, my buddy from all those years ago in theater classes.

"Hi Dean."

"Mac! How's it hangin'. Long time, no talk to," Dean says in a chipper tone.

"Well, I've been better and I've been...let's leave it at 'I've been better'," I say.

There's a long silence, then a sigh from Dean. "Okay, Mac, I was going to approach this from a soft angle, seeing as you're obviously hurting and all, but...what the fuck is going on?" Dean demands. "The Mia MacKenzie I know doesn't cheat on a guy. In fact, I don't think the Mia MacKenzie I know would even jaywalk." I'm silent because I can feel the tears welling in my eyes. Do you remember the Mia that doesn't cry? Yeah, me neither.

"Come on, Mia, tell me what's going on," Dean says in a softer tone. And I do. I tell him. I pour out my heart like I want to for Tom. At the end, Dean finally speaks. "It seems to me you have two directions you can go with this, Mac. You can sit back and let this happen to you, or you can take charge."

I realize Dean is right. I've never been a victim, not anytime in my life. Why am I now? After all, it may be too late for Tom and me, but I've got my career, my life and my dignity to think about.

"Okay, Dean, I'm in. What's the plan?" I ask. Then, we start conspiring like we're going for world domination.

A/N:  Thank you all for sticking with this story. I think I know where this is taking us!  So, fasten your seatbelts because the next few chapters may be a bumpy ride!