Suffering and Recovering [A Marauders Era Fanfic]

Ch. 2 ~ Nightmares and Secrets Revealed

Another chappie! Here ya go! Disclaimer, I own nothing except Jackie. Okay? Okay. 

Read on, my dear unicorns! 

I spent the rest of the day in my garden, rethinking and reaffirming my decision countless times. I constantly replayed the conversation in my head, trying to see if trying to change their mind would work. I smiled when I remembered that my dad called me Snowflake; it's a name he never uses unless he knows that I'm upset over something that has to do with him. James made up that nickname, when I marveled over a snowflake that got caught in my hair. 

"You're so much prettier than the snowflake," he had said in a matter-of-fact tone, as if it were obvious. In my defense, I was only four, so I would be marvelling over many things. But then, so was he. We were twins, after all. 

When he's not a prick, James is a sweetheart. 

My dear older brother has definitely been a blessing in my life. He's always tried to cheer me up when I was down, and when it was a serious issue, he knew when to leave me alone, which I admired about him. Especially with everything going on. He's gotten a bit too quiet around me, though, which is strange. Even when he leaves me to myself, he's never acted this careful around me. It's almost as if he thinks I'm going to break at any given moment. 

My smile left my face as I watched the sunset. He doesn't understand. I felt tears form in my eyes as I thought of Eli's corpse, lying on the floor of Beauxbaton's Great Hall. No one understands. 

And that's when I jump up, trying not to scream, because a hand just grabbed my shoulder. 

I turned around to see James grinning sheepishly at me. Well, speak of the devil, and he shall appear. 

"Sorry Jax, didn't think you'd react like that," he murmured, taking a seat beside me. 

"Should have stopped at 'didn't think'," I whispered back. I stole a glance at him and saw his face light up at hearing me joke. What, did the bastard think I was too weak to laugh, too? 

Dusk had fallen, and the stars were slowly becoming more visible. I leaned on my back, lying in the grass. James leaned back to join me, and we lied there, hand in hand, gazing up at the stars together for the first time in a long while. 

We stayed there for a while without uttering word, until James sighed. 

"You know you can talk to me about anything, right?" 

I nodded, sitting up slowly, when I couldn't hold it in anymore. James hugged me right there, trying to calm me down. He was patted my back soothingly, occasionally saying things such as "Let it out" and "shhhhh". 

Eventually, when I calmed down enough, there was an awkward silence between us. 

"So," James said, trying to re-break the ice, "I hear you're going to Hogwarts!" The way he said it sounded so enthusiastic, as if he actually wanted me there, and so... dorky. 

We both began chuckling, which turned into clear laughter, which became stomach-clutching, rolling-in-the-grass laughter. I hadn't laughed this much since Eli- 

And it stopped as soon as it started. James stopped laughing as well, gazing at me curiously. He seemed to guess why I stopped laughing, and sighed. 

"I know you can't just forget about him, Snow," he said softly, "but please, try. For my sake," he said quickly, as he noticed I was about to cut him off. "Please." And with that, he walked into the Manor. 

 *

I couldn't see or hear anything around me. Nothing at all. And then- light. As if someone was shining a flashlight in my eyes. It was still quiet for a while, until a ringing laughter was heard somewhere in the distance. Soon, the harsh glare of the light vanished, and I could see clearly. What I saw made me cry out in surprise. I saw- Eli. He looked like he did before the Battle. His blonde hair wasn't matted with blood, his bright, blue eyes weren't dull or lifeless. His face was void of any scars. It took me a moment to realize that he was where the laughter was coming from. 

"Get up, Jax," he said, grinning. "God, I missed you."

I grinned, but as I sat up, his face drained of all color. His sparkling blue eyes rolled back into his head, and he fell on the floor with a thud. Within a second, the scars appeared on his face, and his hair was dirty and matted with blood. A distance behind him, the Death Eater's hood fell off, revealing the face of Madame Maxine. I gasped and stumbled back. Suddenly, though, Madame Maxine transformed into Voldemort, who became Dom, who became several upper-classmen who could have volunteered to fight in Eli's place. Finally, though, the Death Eater's face became my own, distorted by madness, and I let out a high scream. 

"Jacqueline! Wake up!" 

I shot up into a sitting position, to find myself in my room, with James sitting next to me. He handed me a tissue. 

"Was that-" 

"Yes," I cut him off.

James knew about my recurring, Eli-related nightmares. He found me crying in my room, curled up into a fetal position after the very first one. 

"They're getting worse," James said through gritted teeth, scowling. "This shouldn't be happening."

"Where are Mum and Dad?" 

"In their room," he replied in a low voice. "I put a silencing charm around their room so that they don't wake up." 

"Again?" I sighed, exasperated. We weren't allowed to do magic outside of school. James could get into serious trouble for this. "You could get caught!" 

"Relax, I won't," he said immediately. "Now what I want to know is why these are getting worse, Jackie! You and I both know that they shouldn't." 

My face paled as I realized why this may be happening. 

"Did I mention that I'm an Animagus?"

He paled too. "What?! Jackie- wha- since when? And what are you?" 

I rolled my eyes, "Last year. Dom is too. She's a bobcat, I'm a white wolf." 

He smirked a bit, before glancing at me worriedly. What was that about? 

"Snowflake seems like an appropriate name for your wolf form," he joked. He then took a deep breath, as if calming down or preparing for something. 

"I'm an animagus too," he whispered. My jaw dropped, but he continued before I said anything. "I'm a stag, my name's Prongs." I stifled a giggle. "Oh, shut up," he said, rolling his eyes. At that, we heard a bird chirp outside. 

"Crap," I said, noticing the time. "James, take the silencing spell off, it's already six in the morning!" 

He paled and did as I said before rushing into his room. Typical, hiding in the pig sty. 

I sighed, flopping back on my bed. Today's going to be a long day. 

That's it for now, more to come later! Remember to comment, vote, and fan!

Much love, Simmi Howell! <3