Endlessly (Harry Styles)

Chapter 53

  *Hazel Murray*

The cameras flashed as I smiled, taking a small pose for them. The paps and the interviewers were yelling my name, trying to catch my attention just for a slight second to get a good picture or even ask me a question.

"Hazel! Over here!"
"Smile to the camera, Hazel!"
"Could I ask you a question?"

I only smiled, shaking off my long black hair off my shoulder. I finally had decided to change the color again, much to Joey's happiness. The raven black, surprisingly, suited me. My fair skin seemed even whiter. The dress I was wearing was just precious: it was made of green silk with flowers on it. The corset was tight around my waist, but I actually looked like I had boobs, which, for once, was great. It molded all of my curves perfectly. I normally didn't like showing off my body, but the dress was so beautiful I didn't even care, for once.

"You look stunning, Hazel!"
"You're hair is amazing!"
"How does it feel like to be nominated for the Billboards Music Award 2013?"

Oh yeah, I was nominated in 12 categories in the BBMAs... I didn't think I would actually win, but it was still kind of flattering. I was nominated in Top Artist, Top New Artist, Top Billboard 200 Artist, Top Hot 100 Artist, Top Digital Song Artist, Top Radio Song Artist, Top Billboard 200 Album, Top 100 Hot Song, Top Hot 100 Song, Top Digital Song, Top Radio Song and Billboard Chart Achievement Award... It was kind of nuts considering I didn't even know the difference between most of these awards... and awkward since I was against One Direction in four of them, and against Taylor in six of them. Oh well, it's not as if I was going to win anything anyways.

I heard a few screams on the red carpet and assumed it was One Direction. I turned around and saw Harry flashing me a cheeky grin. I beamed brightly and ran as fast as my impossibly high heels permitted me to without dying. I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him close. His chest shook in laughter as he wrapped his arms around my small frame picking me up.

"Missed me, Angel?"
"More than you can imagine." I breathed, pulling away just to kiss him.

I heard the cameras going off while the happy paparazzi took hundreds of pictures. I didn't even care. I haven't seen Harry in three weeks,
and I had missed him much more than any other times. He was so busy whenever he had time, he would just sleep. Niall too hadn't been able to Skype me. Louis hadn't even been able to talk to Eleanor, and Zayn couldn't invite Perrie on Tour with them. As for Danielle, I knew from both her and Liam that they weren't doing so well these days...

Harry pulled away, just after pressing one last kiss on my lips.

"God, I missed you too." He chuckled.
I felt goose bumps on my skin as I heard his voice for the first time in ages. "I miss your voice so much."
"Just listen to my songs." Harry repeated, as he always do when I tell him that.

I suddenly tensed, feeling highly uncomfortable. Harry saw the change in my demeanor and frowned.

"What is it?"
"I'm just... nervous for my performance tonight." I lied smoothly.

It wasn't actually a lie, just maybe a twisted truth. Harry, however, clearly saw the difference.

"You know better than to lie to me, Haze."
"It's just that... I wrote a song the other and showed it to Simon and he wanted me to sing it in front for my performance tonight."
"That's great, Haze!"
"Harry, the only person who ever heard that song is Simon. And... it's about you."
"So...?"
"Ugh, you'll see." I sighed, frustrated. "Just, don't think about it."

Harry gracefully dropped the subject, but I knew he was growing suspicious. Thankfully, Niall came right in.

"HAZE!" He yelled picked me up.
"You idjit, put me down!" I giggled. "I'm wearing a dress!"
"Kinda hard not to notice, you look beautiful."
"Thank you. Now put me down."
"As you wish, princess."

He set me carefully on the ground and I immediately went to hug the other boys who joined us. I hugged both Liam and Zayn at the same time, then Louis, who had a sneaky smirk on his face.

"Lou! Up to no good?"
"As always."

A warm hand took mine and I met Harry's steady gaze. I smiled and laced our fingers together. His eyes looked worried, and I knew that I shouldn't have said anything, but... I don't know, I kinda felt as if I owed him that.

"Come on, let's go." I softly said.

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"Now here's performing a beautiful artist, who already won awards tonight and is nominated for seven others tonight (A/N: cause she didn't win all of them), Hazel Murray with her brand new song that has never been presented before, Waiting Game!

I came on stage, smiling as the projectors and the lights blinded me. I had received already three awards, and I was ready to perform my new song, even though I was nervous to what Harry would think. I had written that song when I was drunk, mad because he couldn't call me, and I kind of regretted showing it to Simon the day after that.

I took a deep breath as the music started and the yells faded.

"I'm thinking it over.
The way you make me feel all sexy but it's causing me shame.
I wanna lean on your shoulder...
I wish I was in love but I don't want to cause any pain.
And if I'm feeling like I'm evil we got nothing to gain."

"What if I never even see you cause we're both on the stage?
Don't tell me listen to your songs because it isn't the same...
I don't want to say your love
Is a waiting game."

"Baby I'm thinking it over.
What if the way we started made it cursed from the start
What if it only gets colder.
Would you still wrap me up and tell me that you think that was smart.
Cause lately I've been scared of even thinking about what we are."

"What if I never even see you cause we're both on the stage?
Don't tell me listen to your songs because it isn't the same...
I don't want to say your love
Is a waiting game."

"What if I never even see you cause we're both on the stage?
Don't tell me listen to your songs because it isn't the same...
I don't want to say your love
Is a waiting game."

Screams and applauds coming from everywhere, it was deafening. Even though everybody seemed to have liked it, I couldn't help but feel like I was betraying Harry with that song. I only meant half of the words, but it was enough to anger him. I practically ran off stage to our seats, only to find them empty. Harry wasn't there, and neither was Louis. I panicked.

"Niall, where's Harry?"
Niall looked highly uncomfortable, and also very upset. "He sort of ran away after the second verse... Haze, did you really mean those lyrics?"
I sighed. "I was drunk, I was sad, I was lonely, and I was missing him... and I was on my period. So no, I didn't mean some parts of it. That's why I hesitated so much when I was told to sing it..."
"You better go after Harry, he seemed pretty pissed off."

I nodded curtly and hurried in the direction Niall pointed. My heart broke in half when I saw Louis coming back with a cowl on his face.

"That was fucking low, Hazel! How could you fucking do that to him?"

I opened my mouth to speak but I couldn't. My throat was tight and I couldn't even form words as Louis bashed on me.

"I can't believe you can be such a bitch... You victimized yourself so much, but in the end, you're just like all the other gold digging woman, looking for fame by dissing others. That was bloody low of you, and also pretty freaking disgusting." He spat in my face. "After all the thing you guys have been through, after everything he went through for you... I can't even look at you."

My heart was tight in my chest. I brushed by Louis, shamefully looking at the ground. Louis grabbed my wrist to stop me, forcefully pulling on it. I gasped in pain.

"Let go of me, Louis!" I whimpered in fear, images of Aaron's strong grip on my arm and punching me in the ribs flashing in my mind.

He let go of me and I scurried away from him, tears blurring my vision. Louis stormed off, and I fearfully went in the opposite direction, hoping to find Harry. I did.

He wasn't red with anger. He didn't look angered at all actually. He seemed as if he had been crying, and in a way, it was much, much worse. He was sitting on the ground, holding his knees against him like a sorrowful child.

"Harry..." I whispered, kneeling next to him.

I stroke his hair in a reassuring gesture, and surprisingly, he gave in. He just pulled me in a tight hug and I tried to soothe him.

"Was it true?"
"No, Haz, of course not. I'm very in love with you, and I only doubted us because I was drunk and we were apart. That's all... I'm so sorry, I should never have sang that song..." I murmured.
"To your defense, it was a pretty good song." He chuckled, before chocking on a sob. "Are you sure though?"
"Sure of what?"
"That you still love me?"
I sighed. "Oh, Haz... of course I'm sure. I love you with all my heart, I don't think anybody will ever be able to change that, not even you... Okay?"
"Okay..."
"Now, can we get back to the ceremony, then we'll go to the after-party and get absolutely wasted, then we'll get back to the hotel and have amazing drunk sex, how does that sound?"
"Pretty good." He laughed, erasing the last traces of his cries. "But aren't you worried the paps will see us pissed-drunk?"
"What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas, my dear Harry."
"Then I'm in."

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Drinking wasn't exactly my forte, I have to admit. My tolerance level was pretty low, and I was a lightweight. Result: after the very long promised night with Harry follows the very painful morning filled with vomiting, regrets, more vomiting, and more regrets. And killer headaches.

"I'm never drinking again." I said between to spasms over the toilet bowl. "Like... EVER."
Harry lazily chuckled while holding my hair back. "You always say that."
"This time I mean it." I promised. "This is the last time I'm..."

I had to stop once again to vomit over the bowl, the only sound in the bathroom being Harry's laughter and me... well, you know what.

"We should go take a shower." Harry murmured, kissing my shoulder.
"We should..." I hummed.

Harry picked me up from the floor, making me gasp.

"Jesus, the earth is moving." I said, sickness coming back to me.
"Yeah, yeah, now brush your teeth, I want some shower sex..."
"I knew you were in it just for the sex."
"Pff, I'm Harry Styles, everybody is just in it for the sex."
"It's some pretty great sex."
"Good. Now can we get to it?"


A/N: Maybe not what you were expecting but this had to happen. AND LOUIS IS A GIT I KNOW BUT I NEEDED SOMEONE TO BE IT, AND LIAM DIDN'T STRICK ME AS BITCHY AS THAT, AND ZAYN IS JUST SOFT SPOKEN, SO DEAL WITH THE FACT THAT LOUIS IS BEAST THANK YOU