Road To Victory

Jealous All Along

The instant we got to the parking lot of the stables, Rachel jumped out of the car. She ran straight into the barn and I could tell she was crying.

“Rachel!” I cried helplessly after her, sprinting to catch up. I stopped once I reached the entrance of the aisle. She was crying to Jessie and Rebecca, telling them everything.  My friends. Telling them secrets she couldn’t even tell me. Katherine Collens. Her best friend since we were eight.

And then, still sobbing, I watched as she stumbled downstairs. Probably to see my horse, and to cry into my horse’s velvety ear, telling her why she was crying, with Jessica and Rebecca standing right there. And knowing Tequila, she would give a comforting snort, while Jessie placed back even strand of hair that fell out of place from Rachel’s ponytail, just like she had done to me when I had my first fall from Tequila. And then Rebecca would be there, her hands on Rachel’s  lap, telling her everything would be okay, and that they were here for her.

My friends. My horse. My crush. All taken by Rachel.

It felt like I was in one of those movies where time slows down and I watched everything that happens in a slow, mental agony.  This was just so unfair of Rachel to do.

“Katherine!” It was David’s voice that called my name. Why was he here?

“Katherine.” I heard him behind me, breathing hard, but I was still lost in my movie. And everything was still playing in slow motion.

“I’m so sorry what happened yesterday and-“

“I know David. I know.” I found myself yelling at him; taking out all the anger on him. Because, then again, why shouldn’t have I? “You’re going to Rachel. You’re taking her side. Just like Jessie. And Rebecca. And even Tequila. Everything, gone.” I snapped my fingers, as if I was trying to make something disappear.

“I’m done with this,” I snarled, pushing my hands into his chest and throwing him backwards. A few people had stopped to watch. No, I think it was everyone.

Was that my father grabbing my waist? Was I the one screaming? I couldn’t think straight.

Whoever was holding me, which I’m pretty sure was my dad, let go of me as I kneed him (or her) in the groin, sprinting down towards the basement. Because my friends and my horse were there.

And sure enough, I had pictured it right in my movie. There was Rebecca murmuring soothing words while Jessie tucked even fallen strand of Rachel’s perfect hair behind her round ear.

Then, silence. I could hear myself again, breathing like a panicked mental patient.

“Katherine, I think you should-“ Jessie started, but I cut her off. “I think you should be quiet, okay?! You don’t know what I’ve been going through these past days! Everything has been taken from me, Jessica! Everything I’ve ever loved. My horse, you two – I wouldn’t be surprised if my trainer’s given up on me TOO. And it’s all been because of Rachel!” I screamed, pointing to her. I was about to push Rebecca away so I could shake some sense into Rachel. So she could quit all her dramatic crying because she didn’t even feel half of the pain I was going through. But once again, someone held me back, dragging me away.

“Katherine, you need to calm down,” the voice whispered into my ear. It was David. Of course it was, I said sarcastically in my head. He was the last person I wanted to see, right before Rachel. I attempted to elbow him, but it didn’t work out well since my aim was off. It felt like my head had been thrown into a pit of fog, and I couldn’t think straight. Maybe it was the anger? The adrenaline?

My horse whinnied nervously, disturbed by all the shouts, screams, and hysterical cries.

“STOP!” a voice bellowed. I stopped my struggling, breathing heavily as David let me go. Rachel was still crying, but Jessie and Rebecca were in a little corner, scared out of their minds.

“Jessica. Rebecca. Kid,” my father said, pointing to David. His voice was full of authority and he glanced at me with a stony glare.

“They need to settle this out themselves,” he said pointedly, pointing to both me and Rachel, who held her head low.

They all left, leaving me and Rachel alone. The tension was suffocating, unbearable. Yet neither one of us knew what to think or say. Rachel reached out to feel Tequila’s mane, and I was about to stop her but I didn’t.

“I’m sorry,” I said instead. “For being jealous of you, Rachel. I’m the worst friend ever. Ever.” She was looking up at me know, her eyes puffy and swollen from all her crying. “It all started when I saw you on Tequila. You look so good on her, Rach. And she was so obedient to you; I wondered why she couldn’t do that for me.” I watched Rachel look up to me, taking her hand off Tequila slowly.  “And then you got close with Jessica and Rebecca. They were my friends and now they were yours. And then,” I bit my lip as I sighed. “David. When I heard that you two were going out I was so furious. So jealo-“

“We’re not going out,” Rachel said, her voice crisp and confident.

“What?” I stammered in disbelief.

“We’re not going out,” she repeated, her voice almost emotionless. “You don’t get it, Katherine.  I’m the one that’s been so jealous of you.”

I snorted. Why would someone want to be jealous of me? Well, apart from my riding career, I was a dorky girl that could never land a date. But the words that came out of her mouth sounded true, as unreal as they were.

“You’re an amazing rider. I only ride Tequila and talk to her and spend so much time around her because I want to be more like you. I want to have friends at the barn like you, but whenever I talk to Jessie and Rebecca, we talk about you, and how you are doing and how they want to be more like you. Then when David came around, I finally felt like maybe I could be good at something. Maybe make you jealous,” she admitted.

“Well, it worked,” I snorted.

She went on, her voice faltering a few times. “But today, when I tried to kiss him he told me he couldn’t because he liked you, Katherine. And then I really hated you for being who you were. So accomplished, so pretty, so friendly.”

I looked at her in shock. “That’s exactly how I felt…”

She looked up at me, walking over to me. “I’m really sorry for being such a horrible friend. And if you want to get together with David, screw sister code, because I’m letting you.”

I jumped up and hugged her, squeezing her like I had back when I was 10 and leaving for a 2 week cruise. “I love you, Rachel. And I’m so sorry, because I was an even worse friend…”

We finally let go of each other, smiling and looking at our red-eyed selves. “You know what, Rachel?” I said, my voice a whisper. “You can have Tequila. She can be yours.”

Rachel was thrown totally off-guard, yet she remembered that I hated it when anyone turned down my offers. “Y-You would do that for me, Katherine?” She sounded like a 5 year old on Christmas morning with her squeaky, excited voice. I nodded, pulling her into another hug. “She’s all yours.”