Complicated People, Complicated Love

What happened

Maya

      I open my miniature locker, deciding that today I'll actually bring my textbooks to class. I can practically see dust on the hinges considering I maybe open this thing once a month, not to mention the slight damage from how carelessly I care for them. I take out my history book, which belongs to the only class I don't mind, and that's just because Mr. Matthews doesn't care how much I tease him. If I don't tease someone in bound to go crazy and he's used to my antics, having been around me for years.

     The bell rings and I take my time walking down the rapidly emptying hallway. It's not like my tardiness record could get any worse, I reason.

      "Ah!" I suddenly yell in pain, now glad for the empty hallway. I feel my books slip out of my hands as I raise them to my head, but don't hear them hit the floor. My head is too busy trying to murder me with a sharp searing pain for my ears to be working properly. Not my head, I think to myself, my brain. It's on fire. My now empty hands hold my head and I push hard against my temples, as if the pressure might my brain from falling out of my head because surely it's melting.

       My vision blurs and I close my eyes, waiting for the white hot pain to go away. Please, please go away. Oh my god my head's going to explode, I'm going to die in school for God's sake. I lean against the lockers to my right, trying to make the dizziness stop. When the pain starts to subside, I open my eyes. My vision is blurry for a second and then I feel back to normal... Ish. There's a pounding that won't go away, but nothing compared to the pain that was there a second ago.

     I pick up my books and look around to make sure no one saw me. I'm clear, still empty hallways. I take a deep breath and continue on my way to class. I close my eyes once again, focusing on my breathing. I open the door as soon as I reach it, quickly going to my seat next to Riley and in front of Lucas, as always.

      The pain hasn't been back for a long time, maybe a couple years. And whenever I did feel it, it never lasted long and it was never a constant thing, just every once in a while. No need to worry. My mom and I don't know what triggers it, or if it's just random. I do know how it started. I unfortunately remember all too well.

     I was in the backseat of my moms car when I was ten, just before my dad left. My dad was driving too fast, drunk. I was too young to know that he was drunk, but I knew something was wrong, the car swayed and he smelled awful. He would swerve and cut people off constantly. Like most people driving recklessly,  my dad cut off a car a little too closely and it hit us really bad. My head rammed into the door to my right and I blacked out.

      When I woke up, my dad was carrying me on his back and running. I could feel incredible pain every time his foot hit the ground. When he saw that I was awake, he set me down and looked around frantically. And then stared into my eyes sternly.

     "You can't tell anyone that you're hurt, when they ask you, deny it. Say that you're fine, got it?" He asked aggressively. I nodded beside the pain. He cursed under his breath and touched my head. I yelled out in pain, turning to the side to heave. He pulled his hand back revealing blood. He looked at it and cursed.

      He finally took me home, where he told my mom what happened and made her swear not to tell the police.

     Only my mom and the Matthews know of my head injury. I don't want to worry any of them that it's back, they'll insist I see a doctor and fuss which is the last thing I want. Not like my mom could afford a doctors visit anyway. I decide to keep this morning's incident a secret, if something else happens I'll consider telling one of them.

     I must have looked a little pale because Riley immediately asked me if I was okay. I gave her a smile and a nod, because I was, I felt fine, I didn't even need to lie to her.