*Lexi's pov
"Dinner was amazing, thank you Patsy you didn't have to do that though." I said hugging her. "Call me mom dear and anything for my daughter in law" she said smiling. "Thanks mom" I said and hugged her and then Michael and Liza before turning to Sam who hugged me tightly. "Can Adam tuck us in tonight?" Sam asked as he looked over at Adam who was making his way over to us. "If he wants" Patsy said. "Please Adam! Will you sing me to sleep?" Liza asked as he picked her up. He laughed and kissed her cheek, "okay, Lex mind if I sing a couple of lullabies?" He asked. I smiled, "no way, come on" I said and we all went to the cars. Sam and Liza came with us. Adam held my hand in the car the entire way to his mom's kissing it occasionally. Something incredible about that moment made me think about a family, it made me think about wanting to bring a child into this crazy, screwed up world. It honestly scared me. I looked back at Liza, who was almost asleep, and Sam, who looked worried about whatever he wanted to talk about, and I realized that I loved them. I would do anything for them and I couldn't imagine hurting them, so why was I so scared of hurting my own child? Why did the thought of having a baby scared me so much?
These thoughts were pushed away as we pulled into the driveway. Adam carried Liza in and I walked in with Sam. They said goodnight to Patsy and Michael and we walked them up to bed. "I'm gonna tuck her in first okay Sam?" Adam asked. "Okay night Liza. Lexi will you sit with me?" He asked and I nodded. "Night Liza" I said kissing her head and following Sam. He took his pj's and went to the bathroom to change and brush his teeth. He crawled into bed and I turned on his lamp and sat with him. "So what's going on Sam? How can I help?" I asked quietly. "Well um, at school there's this kid," he started. He looked nervous, "and well he's been kinda mean to me and I don't know what to do" he said. "Mean to you how?" I asked feeling anxious. "He calls me names and pushes me around" he said. I bit my lip, "how does he push you around?" I asked. "What do you mean?" He asked confused. "Does he push you around with his words? Like telling you what to do? Or does he push you around with his hands? Is he physical? Has he put his hands on you?" I asked trying to get to the bottom of this. "He's physical" he said and lifted his shirt to show a couple of bruises. "I haven't told anyone. I don't think I can" he said. "Look Sam, I know how you feel, it's hard to see a way out, a way to get help but there are ways, you have Liza, your mom, Michael, Adam and me all here to support you." I said looking at him. "You don't know what it's like Lexi, to be hit and kicked and have no one believe you" he said scared, tears falling. I pulled him into a hug, "I do know Sam, my parents used to do it to me" I said softly. He pulled back and wiped his eyes, "th.. They did?" He said nervously. I nodded and he hugged me tight. "Are you going to tell everyone?" He asked. I bit my lip, "Sam I have to, this is important. I know it's scary but it will work out, trust me." I said kissing his head.
"How do you know?" He asked. "Well when I was dealing with all of this Adam told me with help it would all be okay. I didn't think it would be but it's better now. And it's all because of Adam and your mom and all of the support they've given me." I said. "Can we wait to tell them?" He asked. "If you want but it won't make it easier, I waited to tell Adam and it was still hard." I replied. He nodded and hugged me tightly. Adam walked in then and looked at us confused but shook it off and kissed me. "okay sir, what song?" He asked happily. "Surprise me." He said sleepily. I kissed Sam goodnight and went downstairs to wait for Adam.
Patsy and Michael were relaxing when I joined them on the couch. "Everything okay?" Patsy asked as I plopped down. "Everything's great." I said with a smile. We talked for a few minutes and Adam came downstairs and collapsed next to me. "God I'm so tired" he whined. "Oh poor baby, then I guess you have to go right to sleep when we get home." I teased. "What? No!" He almost shouted kissing me. "Come on future Mrs. Levine! Let's go home and celebrate privately" he winked kissing me. "Adam Noah!" Patsy said. He laughed, "oh mom relax" he said and kissed her cheek. We finally left and got in the car headed home.
"Lex you okay?" Adam asked finally as he pulled into the driveway. "Yea I'm okay" I said softly. He park and stared at me a moment. He looked concerned but got out and opened my door. I looked up at him and I could feel the forced smile on my lips. So much was running through my head and I knew Adam could see through my lie. He helped me up and held me close kissing me. My fake smile faded to a real, genuine smile as I kissed him back. "I love you" I whispered. "I love you too" he said and carried me up the stairs and into the house. I unlocked the door and kicked it shut, locking it behind us. I wrapped my arms around his neck again and he carried me up the stairs. I laughed kissing him as he set me on the bed. He kissed my neck trailing down to my chest. I arched my back and Adam slipped his arms around me. I bit my lip and pushed up his shirt. Our clothes soon formed a pile on the floor. I looked up at him and kissed him deeply. He kissed me just as deeply as he pushed into me.
*******
The sheets were tangled around us and Adam's fingers trailed along my side and back in a slow seductive way. "Baby?" He said softly his chin resting on my head, my head on his chest. "Yea babe?" I asked back, the beating of his heart relaxing me and preparing me to answer the question I knew was coming. "When you were with Sam, you looked kind of scared" he started, "are you okay?" He asked kissing my head. I looked up at him, "Adam I'm fine, really trust me." I said lying again. Why don't I just tell him? Why is it so hard to talk about this? I bit my lip, "I love you Adam," I said kissing him and settling back against his chest. "I love you too Lexi" he said kissing me back
"No! Let him go! Take me!" I screamed. The man with the hood looked up at me and tossed Sam aside and came after me. "Run Sam run!" I screamed but he stood there. The man forced me to the ground and ripped my jeans and underwear. I kicked and hit and screamed for Sam to run but he didn't. The hood fell off and I was looking up at my uncle Jack. I screamed but he coved my mouth and raped me. When he was through he grabbed Sam and beat him. He beat him until...
I woke up covered in sweat and shaking. Tears flowed down my cheek and Adam jumped up his arms around me. "Lexi, Lexi please its okay. You're okay." He said and held me tight. "Nightmare?" He asked a while later as my breathing relaxed again. "It wasn't just about me. It was about Sam too. About what he told me earlier. The nightmare was kinda expected after that." I said looking at him. "I promised I wouldn't tell, he wanted to..." I said trailing off. I finally sat up and looked at him, he was going to interrupt but I continued, "but I have to tell someone." I said. "He told me that there's this bully at school, and he... He's been hurting him. He has a couple of bruises, nothing compared to what I've been through, but he's scared, he doesn't know how to handle it, but he said he'd try after we talked about my past, in a very broad way." I said quickly. Adam was angry but he held me and kissed me tenderly. "He confided in you?" He asked rubbing my back. "Yes, he wasn't going to because I'm not family but I told him I think I count because I'm engaged to you" I said holding his hand. "You are family and I'm glad he confided in you, no one should handle that alone." He said kissing me. "He'll tell everyone, he promised me, he's just scared." I said. "Thank you baby, for being there for him and for telling me." He said. "Lex, I've been looking into this house." Adam whispered changing the subject. "I know I shouldn't have been lying about those past few interviews that I didn't let you in on but I wanted to check it out and make sure it was good enough for you, I mean my place is out cause of the roomie and this is small..." He said motioning to my apartment. "But it's just us" I said. He nodded, "but I want a family Lexi, I want you to have my kids." He said looking into my eyes. I was glad for the darkness of the room because I cried silent tears. "I don't think I can Adam." I started, "but I'd like to move into a home with you" I whispered kissing him. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me hard and long until we fell back to sleep.
