Competition

Sixteen

Thirty-eight. (It's my birthday today and god I'm really getting old.) Married – (got married three weeks ago). Childless... Six months pregnant. Successful career. Content... Happy... Nervous. Excited.

'We were together six years,' I laughed over lunch. 'Would you believe?'

'That's such a long time,' Karen replied. 'I would never have known. The first time I met you; I just supposed that you two were very close friends.'

'Don't make me laugh,' I laughed. 'He didn't seem to understand what it meant to have a secret relationship.'

'I'm not sure if you were stupid or courageous for doing what you did.'

'How is he?' I asked. 'Does he have another girlfriend?'

'You'll be surprised to know that he hasn't strayed since you,' Karen replied. 'It's just him and Marsha.'

I nodded not sure if I ever wanted to see him again.

'You must have been something really special,' Karen went on. 'I didn't think cheating was something Howard would do.'

'Hmm,' I replied. I looked around the restaurant to see if Ava was on her way.

'So tell me about the honeymoon,' Karen said. 'I want to know all about it.'

I had just returned from a two week honeymoon in Dubai. We had stayed in the Royal Suite at Burj Al Arab and it had been divine. The hotel had been a dream and all I had wanted to do was to stay in our suite and order from room service. Partly because I was pregnant, but partly because it was so luxurious. The views had been breath-taking, the staff very pleasant, nice and helpful. Returning to England had been like waking from a dream.

I turned and saw Ava, who was also pregnant, walk into the restaurant.

Ava and Vladimir were engaged and had been together for seven years. In those seven years they had: broken up several times; had had Alfred Phillipa, who was now five years old, and were expecting a second child. Not to mention, they had moved in together and were currently working on their differences, for the sake of their child(ren).

'Sorry it took me so long,' Ava said sitting down. 'How are you two?'

'Good thank you,' Karen replied. 'You're looking good.'

'Thank you,' Ava smiled. 'You would think I'd be used to this bump, but it still feels strange.'

'And how's Vlad?' I asked. 'Is he doing okay?'

'Yep,' Ava nodded beckoning for a waiter. 'He's just awesome.'

'Trouble in paradise?' I asked. 'Again?'

Ava smiled. 'We're fine,' she said. 'We're still working on sorting some stuff out.'

'Right,' I nodded. 'Well that's always promising.'

'How about you?' Ava asked. 'How is Mr Francis?'

'He's fine,' I replied. 'Working, as usual, but what can I do?'

'Make sure he's buying you some really nice gifts,' Karen laughed. 'Otherwise it's all been for nothing.'

Ava laughed.

'Anyway,' Karen said. 'We were just talking about Howard...'

'Oh please,' Ava said. 'You would think that after two years she was over him already. I mean six years is a long time to be having an affair for.'

'I was saying how I didn't realise they were kind of together,' Karen said. 'So for me to hear that they had been together for six years, was quite a shock.'

'I only met Howard a handful of times, but he seemed nice enough,' Ava said. 'I think it's better now that they've moved on. No more drama or stress...'

I thought about Howard and I thought about the way he had made me feel. He had made me burn with passion and rage and jealousy. He had made me smile, and grin and moan in ways that nobody had ever done before. Howard had been different and in all honesty, I think that Howard had been just what I needed.

For a brief moment I heard Howard whisper something soothing and soft in my ear. I felt how his powdery hands caressed my body; his lips against my lips and his body against my body. We had had so many good times together, but our breakup had been inevitable. I couldn't help but think of Howard from time to time, and when I was with Francis, I couldn't help but imagine Howard next to me. There had been times when I had had to bite my tongue, just so that I wouldn't say his name.

Howard.

* * *

Forty two and feeling it.

Georgiana Luna is finally dressed and at school.

Francis is abroad on some business trip, trying to close a deal.

My heart is racing like never before. With each beat, I feel as though it could shoot out at any moment. These flashes and sparks ripping inside me are electrifying.

I think about the months before Francis proposed. We had been dating for almost a year. Our relationship, I thought, wouldn't evolve much more. I loved my apartment and my life too much; Francis was a workaholic. I had dreaded the thought of leaving Mayfair and moving into the neighbouring Belgravia; trading in my Mini for a more suitable and planet-friendly Prius. But somehow it had all managed to work out. Well kind of.

'David...'

'Who is he?'

I finally understood what it was like and the competition was back on.