Over Time

Chapter five

For the days that followed the night we all went to the mall, Leesha and Miranda called daily just to say hello and check in on me. They would get frustrated every time I complained about them doing so but they always turned it right around telling me the same thing over and over again.

They'd say "We're doing this because we care, Brook. Just know that".

Then I'd shake my head and sigh and mumble some more complaints. Lucky for me they didn't lecture me on how rude I was being to them at the moment. They would just change the subject to something else and try to get me involved in on it.

Today it was a Monday morning and I had found out only a couple of days ago that I was to be forced to go back to school and face the kids there again. I to be honest was not ready to be stared at every single waking moment and being asked if I was okay or if there was something anyone could do to help me. No. There wasn't. There was nothing anyone could do to help. Not unless they could bring my dead boyfriend back from his grave or turn back time to when we had even decided to drink and drive. And it seemed to me that with each passing minute I only regretted my decisions even more, but nothing could match up to the guilt as of the night it actually happened.

I looked myself over in the mirror and noticed that for once my hair actually looked decent for the first time in a while. It was up in a high pony tail, silky and smooth from the never ending shower I took this morning, and my eyes were a bright color along with my lips covered in clear glossy lip gloss. I was actually happy with myself at this point. I may not be ready to go back to school but I looked ready. It looked as if nothing had ever happened, as if the past two weeks hadn't even occurred.

I smiled at my reflection in the mirror then picked up my green purse from the counter before heading down stairs and out the door.

I spotted Miranda and Leesha in the driveway in Miranda's car, waiting patiently for me to finish getting ready.

"Hey Brook!" Leesha said with a smile.

I waved slightly then slid into the back seat of the car and sighing. I smiled faintly at Miranda giving her the cue to back out and get us to school already.

When we had finally arrived at school I hopped out of the car and instantly I could feel all eyes on me. Kids I didn't even know, kids I used to talk to and even kids I had been friends with were gawking at me in a manner that made me feel more than uncomfortable. It would have been a huge understatement if I had said that this was the most uncomfortable I had felt in all my seventeen years.

I walked passed people as they stopped and stared, some even looked like they were ready to approach me and say hello but didn't quite have the nerve to do such a thing. And to be honest I sort of wished they would have come up to me and said something, or do anything really. Just want to get people to see that I was okay and that it was safe to reach out to me and have a conversation with me instead of being so afraid of my sudden existence.

"Hey!" I said with a slight smile as I approached my best guy friend Nathan.

He looked up from his eye phone and just gawked at me like everyone else. His mouth hung open in a shocked sort of way and his eyebrows were raised a little.

"H-Hi" Nathan responded as he put his phone back into his right coat pocket.

"What's up?" I asked, hoping he would just get over the fact that I was talking to him and just join me in the conversation, but he still remained slightly shocked and looked as if he was about ready to turn and run from me.

"Nothing..." he started "Look" he paused, licking his lips as he rubbed the back of his neck in nervousness. "I uh...I got to get to class early...so....I guess I'll see you later" He turned away from me, heading in the opposite direction than I stood.

I gripped his arm in mine and pulled him back gently, looking him in the eyes.

"Nathan, I don't want you to be so afraid of me. Please just stay and talk" I begged him, giving him the saddest puppy dog eyes I could muster up in an instant, knowing that he couldn't and wouldn't back away from me ever with the looks I always gave him. But somehow this time it was different than the other times I had used my eyes to get what I wanted.

This time he just shook his head and sighed "I really have to go Brook" he said pulling his arm out of my reach and quickly walking back towards the school which was now filling itself with students.

I sighed as Leesha and Brook both gave me a concerned look.

"I'll be fine" I answered their question that had not even been asked yet.

I, myself followed the rest of the school inside and gathered myself together just enough to start my day and end it.