Arkham High

Chapter 10

"Where is Edward this evening?" asked Jervis Tetch, looking around the auditorium. "You think he'd be a Shakespeare fan."

"He said he had some important work to do," replied Crane, sitting down next to him. "Though what work can trump the words of the immortal Bard, I haven't the foggiest."

"Is Harley coming?" asked Tetch.

"I didn't get a chance to speak to her today, but I'm sure she will," said Crane. "An intelligent woman like that wouldn't pass up a performance of Hamlet."

"You should have asked her to go with you," said Tetch. "I wouldn't have been offended if you wanted to take her here on a date."

"My dear Jervis, this isn't a Midsummer Night's Dream or some sort of frivolous musical!" retorted Crane. "This is Hamlet! Shakespeare's greatest tragedy! It's full of violence, murder, and madness! It simply isn't the thing you take a nice girl to on a first date!"

"Apparently the Joker doesn't agree with you," murmured Tetch, looking past him at the door.

"What?" demanded Crane, turning around. He jaw dropped in astonishment and fury as he saw Harley enter the auditorium with the Joker following close behind.

"So...they're here together," snapped Crane, as Joker and Harley took their seats a few rows in front of them. "That doesn't mean they're on a date! You and I are here together, and we're not on a date!"

"True," said Tetch, nodding. "But contrariwise, if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't."

"Yes, quite right," agreed Crane, folding his arms across his chest.

The play began. As Arkham's finest actor, Basil Karlo, took to the stage declaiming Hamlet's most famous soliloquy, Crane was distracted from the contemplation of conscience making cowards of us all by seeing the Joker yawn loudly, stretch, and then drape his arm around Harley's shoulders. To Crane's fury, Harley made no attempt to remove it.

"If I did that to you, would we be on a date then?" murmured Tetch, leaning over.

"Shut up," growled Crane.

The Joker didn't wait until Karlo's five curtain calls were over at the end of the show - he took Harley's hand and hurried from the auditorium the moment the curtain came down. "Geez, that guy really puts the ham in Hamlet, don't he?" he asked once they were outside.

"Basil? I thought he was kinda good," said Harley. "Didn't you enjoy the show?"

Joker shrugged. "I ain't the kinda guy who enjoys nonsense, toots - that's more Tetchy's thing."

"It...wasn't nonsense," said Harley, slowly.

"Are you kidding? They were speaking in gibberish the whole show!" exclaimed Joker. "I would've fallen asleep, or stood up and interrupted him, but I didn't wanna embarrass the pretty girl sitting next to me," he added, smiling at her.

Harley smiled back, feeling guilt gnawing away at her. It was wrong of her to be doing this to use him, but she didn't feel like she had a choice. If she wanted that scholarship, she had to go through with this.

She took his hand. "So...you wanna go for a walk?" she asked, gently. "It's a nice night."

"Yeah, I need to stretch my legs after sitting still for hours," agreed Joker. They headed for the school grounds, hand in hand, in silence.

Harley was consumed by guilt, but she cleared her throat and said, "So...how's the campaigning going?"

"Oh, really well, toots!" he chuckled. "I hope you got a prom dress picked out, because that election is as good as mine!"