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"[Y-y/n] It really isn't what it looks like I swear!"

Petra tries to reassure me that this was a misunderstanding. Is it really? She moves closer. I step back. I'm lost at words. I don't know what to say. Everything is happening too fast for me I can't catch up. So Many tears flow out of my eyes I couldn't keep count anymore.

Petra, she looks terrified. Why should you be scared? I'm the one who should be horrified by all of this. I look at Levi. He stands still, not even moving a muscle. He stares down at the sand. He looks guilty.

Why aren't you saying anything.....

"I-I shouldn't h-have came"

It doesn't even take me a second and I instantly running. It's just like that same exact scene from two years ago. I run away from Petra and Levi. Except this time, Levi doesn't call out for me...

I can't face anyone right now. I text Eren saying that I'll walk home. He says okay and I start running again. I want to run away from this reality. From this nightmare. I hate this. I hate all of it. How could I? I'm so fucking stupid. Why did I let him fool me? All those fucking lies. All for what.

I want to scream. Scream until I loose my voice. I want to beat myself up. Multiple times until I become numb to the feeling. I sprint even faster knowing that he could arrive at the house before I do.

I'm fucking done. I grab my keys out of my pocket. My hands shake slightly as I turn the knob. I ignore the side of me that's telling me to stay. That's telling me that all of this was just not real. But how can I. It's real. And Levi. If it wasn't. Why didn't you tell me right then.

No, I ignore that part of me that still cares. I'm focusing on one thing. I'm leaving.

In a flash, I pack all my bags containing everything I owned. I don't care if I left a mess. I really don't. I Lock the front door leaving this house that once made me happy. I can't believe all of this is happening.

I can't face my friends right now. They've always told me. At least once that Levi might do something. I accepted the possibility that it might happen. But I never imagined for it to be like this. I'm afraid that if I face them. They might tell me they were right. And I don't need that right now.

There was no where else to go since I don't have an actual house to myself. The only person I knew I could go to was Hanji. I desperately need to get away from this. I quickly make my way to Hanji's.

I violently knock on her front door. In a matter of seconds, she opens the door.

"[Y/n-]"

The sight of her makes me burst into more tears. I drop my bags unconsciously to my side and immediately hug her. Causing the both of us to fall on the floor.

"[Y/n] oh my God what happened?!"

She helps me up off the floor and instantly starts to comfort me. I never let go of her. I can barely speak. I sob even louder into her shoulder. With her question my mind recalls what happened moments ago.

I wish I never saw that. I wish I never woke up to begin with. I should've just stayed home. Let Levi hurt me without knowing. Anything so it could just be like how it was before.

"Hanji! I-I'm so f-fucking stupid! I'm so fucking..... Stupid..."

My tears of sadness slowly turn into tears of rage. I hug her like I'm holding on for dear life. Like I'm afraid that if I let go of her, I'll fall into a deep dark whole that never ends. Her grip on me tightens as well.

"[Y/n] What happened?"

She asks me calmly. Her soothing voice makes me cry even more. I clench my fist with a handful of her clothing on her back. I can't stop.

"L-levi a-and Petra I-I......"

I can't even fucking finish my sentences. I'm hyperventilating. Hanji quickly gets up and rushes towards the kitchen grabbing a water bottle.

"[Y/n], [Y/n] here drink this and take deep breathes. Calm down."

My body shivers as I try to breathe in slowly. I can't. I close my eyes and try to exhale as smoothly as I can. I do the same routine in and out until my breathes settle down.

"I-i...... Saw them..... on the beach t-together... And I just can't anymore... Hanji... It hurts so much. It hurts so.... F- fucking much."

She stares down at the floor while rubbing my back. I feel bad to have made her worry about me. I wipe away my tears with my already soaking sleeve. There was no use into doing so. No matter how much I try to calm down I can't bring myself to stop fucking crying.

My phone starts to ring, with that one special ringtone. Now all of it was shit. I nod my head regretting everything. I take out the battery of my phone and toss it away from me.

"[Y/n], What if all of it was a misunderstanding? I'm not saying it because I'm trying to defend him or anything but did you at least gave him a chance to explain?"

"I-I can't! Cause he didn't even fucking say anything to me! H... He just stood th..there......without saying a thing.."

Hanji's phone starts to ring. Over and over again. Minutes later I sigh and just let her answer it. I stay quiet as I possibly can by covering my mouth with my hand.

-Hello? Levi?-

-Hanji! I fucked up! I fucked up I fucked up I fucked up..-

I thought I can do this but I couldn't. I race up the stairs once I heard his voice through the phone, practically yelling. Bullshit. I slam the door shut, zoning out their conversation by drowning into my thoughts. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear his voice. I don't want to face him anymore. I don't even want to hear the mention of his name. Fuck you Levi.

I scream into my hands, falling slowly down to the cold wooden floor. Breaking down. I punch the wall.... Over and over and over. Hitting it harder than the last. Over and over until it satisfies me.

I'm tired. All of this guessing, us dating. Was it really worth anything. If he was just going to go back to Petra he shouldn't have even asked me in the first place. My head hurts. My heart hurts. My body is aching from all that running. From all that crying. My knuckles a swollen. My eyes are red and puffy. There's just so many feelings and thoughts stirred up inside of me I just can't think straight.

Hanji opens the door to her dark room. I've finally calmed down. My eyes have dried up, I couldn't express my feelings with these tears anymore.

"[Y/n]...."

She squats down to my level and smiles.

"You want to know what Levi told me?"

I want to do bad. So desperately bad. I force a chuckle.

"..... No..."

She sighs and carries me over her back. I feel like shit. I feel mad. I feel sad. I feel like laughing. I feel stupid.

Shit because everything around me isn't clear anymore. Mad because of my foolish decisions. Sad because of what I saw. He was lying to me about the things he used to say. Laughing because... I should've known he wasn't going to be mine forever. It's so pathetic it's hilarious. Stupid because I let him sweep me off my feet and actually thought he meant everything he said. Maybe he did. I remember him saying what if I get bored of him. Little did we know it'd end up the other way around.

But the other side of me keeps telling me I should've just let Hanji tell me what he said. Keeps telling me that Levi He didn't mean to do this. That what I saw wasn't what it seemed. There was something behind what I saw. What exactly though.... Why did Levi have to do that behind my back. Why did he have to leave. What was he planning to gain after that. I should've just let Petra explain to me. But I had to be so stubborn.

"I want to help You two out but I also want the two of you to work it out yourselves."

She says as she tucks me into her bed. I soon start to feel myself getting sleepy.

What a day......

That High School Love ·Levi x reader·Where stories live. Discover now