I never want to be without you

Part 1

  One.. Love never dies a natural death. 

 It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source.

It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. 

It dies of illness and wounds.It dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.

So,if you don't want love would die...take care of it as you more care for yourself.

----

[I'm here with Mark Dennis,my only true bestfriend and as usual he is shouting at me because of my foolisness.Because I'm keep on loving the guy that doesn't carring me.The guy that doesn't loved me.]

Dennis:I keep telling you to stop being fool ,Sam!He doesn't deserve your love.....please stop being stupid!!because of that stupid love...Im begging you Sam....Please stop!Learn to appreciate those who are still there for you........Look you need to see today's possibilities,you need to close your eyes and forget all the pain that he did..HINDI KA NIYA MAHAL!!!

[And with that he leave]

'Did I being to much?Ehh?I just loving the guy that makes me happy,makes my day perfect.Whats wrong with that?'

[I go to my room just to change my clothes then I will go to meet my bf,Nathaniel Davidson.Well Nathaniel is a handsome man but he known as the 'cassanova' of our campus.He's 20 y/o while Im 19 y/o.And it been a 5months since we are together.But in that 5months together he doesnt show care or love to me.Halos ako lang yung umiintindi sa kanya,ako lang yung nagpapakita ng sweetness,akolanv yung nagmamahal sa kanya.And almost the time when we are together he almost shouting at me.He almost anger eventhough I didn't do anything bad or anything that he doesn't like.Minsan kung hindi ko na talaga kaya sinasabi ko sa sarili ko na give up na ako but How can I give up the man that I love?the man that my life?the man that can control me?...hahahaha....It's hard to think but its true..WEIRD BUT IT IS TRUE!]

*** 

here at park

[And as usual ako nanaman yung naghihintay.Palaging ganito naman yung set up namin ehh.I swear wala pang time na nauna siya sa meeting place namin,na siya yung naghihintay..kasi ako nalang palagi yung naghihintay ehh.....haist...Love!love!Love!love is suffering....love nga naman...]

Nathaniel:oh?bat nandyan ka nakaupong naghihintay sa akin?!,diba sabi ko naman sayo na kapg hinihintay ako ayaw na ayaw ko yung nakaupo?  

Sam:Sorr---

Nathaniel:Sorry?!how many times you said that to to me!!?your sorry is useless you know?Because you didn't follow my rules!!!

Sam: Nath---

Nathaniel: Nathaniel,sorry?yeah.bitch I know that line and I already memorize it...

[Hes too rude]

Sam:I'm not a bitch and I hate you calling me bitch

Nathaniel: Your not a bitch?oww!!!how come that your not a bitch?

Sam:Im not a bitch

Nathaniel:oh really?then why are you not following my rules bitch?

Sam:Not always following your rules does it mean that Im a bitch

Nathaniel:ohhhh really?!

Sam:hmm...

Nathaniel:How do I believe you?

Sam:By listening all what I said...thats it

Nathaniel:what if I dont like to listen you?

Sam:then Im the one who will understand to you...so please Nathaniel ..bring back the sweetness before of Nathaniel Davidson.I miss the Nathaniel na malambing palang...maunawain at minahal ako pero bakit nag-iba simula nung sinagot ko?...Promise its just a little patience that left...so please kahit maaga pa pakitunguhan mo naman ako ng madanda...huhuhu

[While Im saying that line I was crying...wala na ba talagang pag asa sa relationship namin? Grabe na kasi ehh...nahihirapan na ako na palaging ganito ehh...na palaging sinisigawan niya ako]

Nathaniel:Sam,sorry

[Sorry?did he just said sorry?oh well ngayun ko nanaman siya narinig na nagsabi ng sorry sa akin for the last five months...kasi dati yung nanliligaw pa lang siya palaging siya yung umiintindi sa akin pero simula talaga nung sinagot ko siya nagbago na lahat pati siya]

Nathaniel:Sorry for being so rude,careless,heartless,hard,inhuman,cruel,harsh,bad,brutal,cold,grim,making you sad and worry,ungentle,unkind,and being anger in everysecond that we are together.I know even I said a million of sorry to you,but it doesnt really change what you feel.But promise!from know on I will change.My attention is all yours.And I will take care of you Sam...I Love you...please dont give up to me...

[With that he hug me,And I felt him crying and next thing I knew I felt myself crying...Crying of tears of joy...I have been waiting this day...Day that he will apologize to me all of his bad attitude...And finally he apologize to me and I felt so much beatitude.]

Sam:You know what Nath? everyday I've been praying na sana isang araw maging sweet ka rin sa akin yung tipong maging mabait ka na sa akin...then God is good because all my prayers he granted.....and I will always love you Nath..

Nathaniel:Am I forgiven?

Sam:yes!you always forgiven Nath because I love you

Nathaniel:then what is your wished?

Sam: Everyday ipinagdarasal ko na sana bumalik na na yung pagmamahal mo sa akin

Nathaniel:hindi naman nawala yung pagmamahal ko sayo ahh.....

Sam:But you actions can-----

Nathaniel:Action are not always true as you see because there are peoples that doesnt true with their actions or they know as 'plastic people'......and its the matter of what you felt...

Sam:Looks like you know everything

Nathaniel:yeah...I love you more

[He laugh and still hugging me....I really miss this guy.His laugh making me smile and making my day complete]

Sam:anong iloveyoumore?wala akong sinabing I Love You ah..

Nathaniel:so?hindi mo ako mahal?

Sam:hey!I didnt say that I didnt love you.....I said earlier 'looks like you know everything' then sahot mo 'Iloveyoumore'?

Nathaniel:whats wrong with that?

Sam:nothing...

Nathaniel:hindi mo lang ako mahal ehhh

Sam:hey nath---

Nathaniel:hindi mo nga ako mahal!

[Huh?if I know nagpapalambing 'tong isang ito]

Sam: Mahal kita....

Nathaniel:Say it with my name!!!

Sam:I Love You Nathaniel Davidson

Nathaniel:Good!!I Love You more Samsea Gasmen

[I love you Samsea Gasmen....its been a long since I hear that sentence..that he is saying that he love me...Im really really happy because I will always love this man of mine]

(A/NThis is dedicated to YanaJIn...hehehe...Shes one of my boss..hehehe.)