Drive//L.H.

~20~

It's officially been one week of this "relationship" Calum and I are working on. We went to a nice diner and drive in movie after for our first date and I have to admit that it was adorable. I'm not sure about my feelings for Calum. We've gotten a little bit closer but I find myself comparing him to Luke. Speaking of Luke, he has no idea that we're seeing each other. The only one that knows is Michael. He's been supportive I suppose.

I glance over and see Calum stroll into school like he runs it. I think it's funny how his behavior changed after we got together. There's this essence that follows with him. He's very confident and it's attractive to see, but I don't want to be the one the destroys him if this doesn't work out.

He smiles at me as he walks over to my locker. "Morning babe. Are you ready for that test today?" He asks.

"Sure." I mumble distracted. All day I've had this sense of dread deep down. Today was the first actual display of affection between me and Calum and people are already talking. I'm afraid of what Luke's reaction is good to be. I keep reminding myself that I shouldn't give a shit about him, and rightfully so I shouldn't. There's something in the back of my mind that keeps telling me that his opinion matters. A lot. It's not fair that he continues to play me like this and always seems unaffected while I go through world war 3 with myself.

The bell rings and Calum grabs my hand and interlocks our fingers as he walks me to class. And I'm more focused on the whispers.

--

It was finally the end of the day and everyone had seen Calum and I together. There was no sign of Luke, which didn't help my nerves. Now I'm more worried about what he's heard from his 'friends' who love to bullshit everything. I said goodbye to Calum before walking to my car. I know that I'm acting like a bitch, but I'm so stressed out. It sounds stupid that I'm worrying about another boy who's not my boyfriend, but there's something about Luke. Calum is a great guy who doesn't deserve this and I'm a selfish girl who wants everything and nothing to do with him.

I was almost to my car when I hear Ashton. It feels like he's always there to make everything worse when I don't feel like it could get any worse. "Camari talk to me, or Michael, or I don't know maybe Calum since he's your boyfriend now." He sneers in disgust.

"Go the fuck away Ashton. I don't want to deal with your shit." I groan annoyed. I know boys are dumb but he needs to take a hint.

He scoffs. "Yeah right, like you ever have to deal with anything. Tell me Cami, when was the last time you dealt with any of your problems?" He says in a descending tone like I'm a mer child.

"Are you serious? I deal with you and your friends shit everyday!" I snap defensively.  I hate that I come off that way, like some girl who has to justify my actions. I don't have to justify anything, especially to him.

"I hardly count running away a and ignoring your problems as you dealing with them. You need to see a therapist or talk to someone." He says.

"Why do you care what I do? I'm sure you're loving this on the inside hmm? You just love to see me fall apart and for the record asshat I'm not 'running away from my problems' I'm still alive and I still attend this school and I always see your ignorant ass so tell me how I'm not dealing with it?!" I snap. I've had enough. He begins to open his mouth but I cut him off. "And as for seeing a therapist, I don't need one. I'm not mentally fucked up and they aren't going to tell me anything you haven't so that's Doctor Dickhead for telling me about the pain he caused because in case you haven't seen, I'm already aware."  His shocked face is enough to prove I've won this round of back and forth. I get in my car, slamming my door. If it were my real car I would have been gentle, but considering its a piece of shit rental until I get my other one, I could care less.

I get home and through my bag on the counter. I was so frustrated and for the first time in a while I'm glad my mom isn't home. Her and I are still feuding and my dad and I still aren't speaking. I can't believe my mom wants to me to move in with a stranger that she's kept me away from. Some people just aren't supposed to be parents.

I open the door to my room and go through my things. I guess I should start packing if I have to go live with my father. I sort through my endless pile of clothes when my phone rings. I let it go to voicemail. I look and see they've left a message. I listen to and begin to get happy as the people have called to tell me I can go get my car. At least there's a positive side to this day. I glance at the clock seeing that it's already 7:00 p.m. The dealership closes at 8:00 so I have enough time to get it. I jump up in excitement and find the keys buried under all my clothes. I grab them and run out to the car.

I hand over the rental keys as I'm handed my own. "She's all good to go." The nice mechanic says. I left a nice tip considering he had to go out of his way to find the right parts to fix my car. He smiles as I get in.

I take a deep breath as I rest my hands on my steering wheel. This moment right here feels like coming home. I can already feel myself relax. I thank the man for the hundredth time before starting the car and pulling out of the shop.

I decided to take the long way home, which coincidentally is in Calum's neighborhood. I park in his driveway and texted him to meet me out front. He comes out looking happy yet confused. His facial expression makes me laugh to myself. "You got your car back?" He asks excited. I nod frantically, equally if not more excited than him. "What are you doing here then? Shouldn't you be out driving all over?" He asks. I smile at him.

"Why do you think I'm here? I've got a full tank of gas, an aux cord, and a highway with our name on it. Get in." I say laughing. He looks surprised by my offer. Usually I take these drives alone to get away from people. I've explained to Calum a lot how this is my escape. It strikes a feeling inside me to see him cherish this moment. Most people would think nothing of it, but it means a lot to him. I can't tell if that makes me nervous or ecstatic.  I can't help but maybe think I'm letting him get to close. The fear is that I'll fall for him and then have to choose. The worst part is deep down I think we both know it won't be him.

"Well what are we waiting for? Let's drive!" He cheers excited. The last thought I have before pulling onto open road is maybe, just maybe, I'm falling in love with him.

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Wow friends it's been awhile! I've been so busy with this stupid school but I'm glad to get back in the swing of writing. My goal is to hopefully finish this before the end of the year. I have many ideas whirling around I can't wait to write😌😌 anyway happy reading.xx

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