To save a Life

chapter 17

Blue

Louis met us outside where the fans couldn't see, to let Tyler and Josh in. Workers gave then a pass just like mine so they wouldn't be thrown out. They nudged each others shoulders as the looked around. "Hey Lou? Can I show them the stage?" He smiled and nodded. "Just be quick, the doors are about to open and you don't want to be on the stage when people start walking in." I nodded eagerly and started to lead one of my favourite bands to the stage.

"So how did you get so tight with the biggest boy band on the planet?" I scratched behind my neck nervously. "Erm, I used to be best friends with Harry." They gave me a look, but being that I just met them, I didn't really want to go more into my story. "We'll get that story of yours out of you eventually-" Tyler cut of as we entered the stage. They were in complete awe. I giggled.

"Sing something! Put on a show for me!" I exclaimed. They looked at each other and thought for a minute. Looking back at me Josh asked, "what's your favourite song?" My eyes widen. "Are you serious? I can't pick just one!" They laughed. Either 'Time to go' or 'Drown' or 'Lovely' but I don't know they're all so relatable and good."

They gave me a brief sad face then brightened and said "Let's do a bit of both!" I nod and jump up and down a bit. "You want to sing along?" Tyler asked as he stood behind a piano in the back and Josh sat down at the drums. I shrugged. "Why not? I'm not the best singer but I'll try to keep up with the rapping!" "Good spirit! Josh exclaims as he points his drum stick at me.

Tyler begins playing the piano, it's quiet because it's not being fed through the sound system but that's okay. I instantly recognise it as Drown. Tyler starts singing and I instantly get goose bumps rising on my skin. 

"Here I come, come to you in the very clothes
That I killed, killed you in and now I know I'm alone
I walk to you, rain falls from you
Can you wash me, can you drown me?"  Tyler sings.

I take a breath and begin to speak the words with Tyler as he raps along.

"I wanna be a lot of things, so much pent up inside of me
I wanna be stronger, too long I've sat here undecidedly"

"Louder Blue!" Josh yells as Tyler and I continue to rap.

"Planning strategy, half of me know it's all just a fallacy
Failing miserably, drastically and then I crash dramatically
Into a wall I've hit a hundred times before
And yet I still ignore the dark red blood stains on the floor
And I'm back in front of you, Lord, with the blood on the floor
Is the blood mine or yours? Don't wanna do this anymore"

Tyler fades out as he continues playing the piano, letting me carry on, but I'm so into keeping up with the rap to realise.

"Back and forth between being me and who you call me to be
You see a man free who thinks he has to buy a key
To a door but he can't 'cause he's poor and he can't
Fall down anymore 'cause he's already on the floor
And his heart is broken and all and this is his scar
But it's warm from crying 'cause he will try nine times
To realize nine crimes but he has more than nine lives
So he picks himself up and keeps fighting for the prize again"

Josh cheers as Tyler takes on the chorus.

"Here I come again to you
Just to show the blood soaked through
Through my bones and all I own
Is there a way for me to grow?
I walk to you, rain falls from you
Can you wash me, can you drown me, please?"

"Let's switch to screen!" Tyler says as he bins playing a different rift on the piano. And Josh joins in. "Both of us Blue!" Tyler says as he motions me beside him and makes me

"I do not know why I would go
In front of you and hide my soul
Cause you're the only one who knows it,
Yeah you're the only one who knows it
And I will hide behind my pride
Don't know why I think I can lie
Cause there's a screen on my chest
Yeah there's a screen on my chest

I'm standing in front of you
I'm standing in front of you
I'm trying to be so cool
Everything together trying to be so cool
[x2]"

As I start singing, not as well as Tyler but not complete crap either, my eyes close and I start seeing Harry as I sing the words.

"I can't see past my own nose, I'm seeing everything in slo-mo
Look out below crashing down to the ground just like a vertical locomotive
That's a train, am I painting the picture that's in my brain?
A train from the sky, locomotive, my motives are insane
My flow's not great, okay, I conversate with people
Who know if I flow on a song I'll get no radio play"

Tyler stops raping and lets me do the rest of the rap part.

"While you're doing fine, there's some people and I
Who have a really tough time getting through this life
So excuse us while we sing to the sky."

My voice breaks as wetness gathers in my eyes, but I continue anyways.

"I'm standing in front of you
I'm standing in front of you
I'm trying to be so cool
Everything together trying to be so cool
[x2]
We're broken
We're broken
We're broken
We're broken people, oh.
We're broken people, oh.
[x3]
(We're broken
We're broken
We're broken
We're broken people, oh.
We're broken people, oh.)
[x2]
I'm standing in front of you
I'm standing in front of you
I'm trying to be so cool
Everything together trying to be so cool
[x2]"

"Are you okay?" Tyler asks after the song finishes. I nod and suddenly register a sound. "I think the doors are opening let's get off the stage." They both nod but still look at me with a concerned look. I hate that look. I tore more of my emotions open with that song. First it was opening up to Harry and not this. If I kept opening myself to this pain, i might not survive.

"Hello, my name is Harry, who are you?" A deep voice says as Harry comes out of the shadows. God how long was he there? So I asked him.

"Not long." He said but didn't look at me.

Harry

I was walking around trying to figure out what my brain was think when I heard some laughs coming from the stage area. Were the doors already open and fans were already starting to fill the arena? I peaked out onto the the stage to see Blue and two males talking about performing. Suddenly one of them went to the drums and Blue and the other went to the piano which was closer to where I was.

They started to play. They were good. As they started singing I could hear Blue singing too. She wasn't too bad.
But the pain in her voice as she rang out the heartbreaking words is what killed me most.
Was she singing about me?

I shook it off. It wasn't her song so she  obviously wasn't singing about me. As they ended, Blue sounded so broken, like she had opened a valve of emotion. She brushed it off though and begun to leave. I decided to make myself known and introduce myself.

"How long have you been there?" Blue asked. I could tell she didn't want me to have seen their little performance. Maybe she did connect the song with me. I shook the thought off. And told her I hadn't been here long. The two men introduced themselves as Tyler and Josh.

I didn't like the feeling that was growing in my stomach and chest. What even was that? Before I could try to identify it, Blue ushered the guys and herself away from me.

What was that all about?