Finding Paris(part 1)

Chapter 5

GO! GO! GO! GO! The crowd cheered Mia on as the guys held her upside down over the beer tank. I don’t know how the hell she does it; I thought I was supposed to be the one getting drunk. I actually felt a little drunker than usual, my legs felt hot, my lips felt numb. I heard my favorite song boom through the speakers and my body responded with no permission necessary. The bass felt so good against my skin, I took my full cup of Long island ice tea to the head and I knew I was gone for the night. With my hands in the air I sang along with the music "My baby shot me down down.” I spotted Alan across the room, as he continued to watch me I sang to him with my hands to him at gun point. “Shot me down with a love and it go POW POW.”

“Ouch.” He mouthed with his hand over his heart. He walked over to me mouthing the rest of the song. ”I love my baby freaky style.”

At that moment as I headed towards him Mia grabbed my hair from behind gently singing loudly in my ear. ”But my baby is always sneaking out.” I stared at Alan watch us and smiled with innocence “Sneaky bitch.”

The lights were off and all I could see was the Black flashes. I was enjoying myself with my best friend and I couldn’t have it any other way. Everything that made me stay up late nights crying and questioning myself about life and love trouble disappeared. I wish I could have this feeling forever. I spotted Stephen across the room behind the breakfast bar and something came over me, I wanted to approach him but I hated to see his face with another girl. I watched her kiss all the places on his neck I knew he liked to be kissed. “Ugh.” I walked away heading I don’t know where but I knew I needed to get away from them. I headed down stairs to the basement almost falling over my own two feet down the stairs. It was dark and hot and muggy feeling, I searched for the light and by the time I found the light switch, Stephen was in front of me.

“Why are you here?” I asked with all the anger hidden inside me. I waited for him to answer but he just stared at me. “Ok I’m done with this, I’m done with you and you could tell that trash upstairs to walk the fuck out right behind you.”

“You really need to calm down.” He said simply not even budging to leave.

I stared deep into his eyes searching for his soul but it seemed too dark for hope. Tears pooled in my eyes as I turned away from him, I was hurt and I didn’t care if he heard me cry, I wanted him to hear what hurt sounds like from someone he so called loved. I sat down on the couch with my hands covering my face; I couldn’t believe how easy it was for him to watch me break down like this. He sat down beside me and touched my shoulder. He felt like a stranger to me, his touch threatened me. ”Don’t.”

“I wish I could explain the reasons why I have been acting the way I have but…I just can’t. I love you and…”

I jumped up out of my seat the moment he said those three words that obviously meant nothing to him. “JUST STOP.” I screamed so loud I almost scared myself. From the looks of it I might have scared him too. “Just stop talking. Do you know how it feels to love someone and wants nothing to do with you, to sleep at night with the one person on my mind that I shared everything, with besides my best friend I looked for your helping hand. You broke my walls down and showed me that life just might not be sucky as I thought. I gave you everything; we use to talk what the hell happen. You use to spend days and nights with me and you’re just gonna throw it all away…” I paced up and down the room thinking of reasons as to why I’m standing here explaining myself when I should be walking out.

“Paris…” the sound of my name coming out of his mouth in his accent tore me up inside. Whenever he was beginning to get emotional or angry his British accent came out strong. “I really need you to relax…I know you hate me right now and I’m sorry…I”